Thoughts on wishing an ex Happy Birthday?

[Honeycomb8]

I was only asking to see other people's perspectives. I asked a couple of friends and they said emailing is fine. Regardless of the past, I do wish him well. I guess I'll just wish that silently then lol.

This statement here is showing there’s more under the surface.

 

We don’t block people who meant a lot to us.

 

If this was a cordial, drama free breakup he would not be blocked and communication would be open.

 

It’s not and there’s a reason.

 

You’re a regular here, you already know, if you have to ask there’s ulterior motives.

 

So as blue said, the question isn’t so much should I but why?

 

Explore that. Come to peace with it. Then and only then decide.

[reinventmyself]

I don't agree with the notion that we don't block people that meant a lot to us. Our relationship was very complicated and I needed to move on with my life. It wasn't cos I didn't care; it was the exact opposite.

 

I don't agree with it either, but the mere fact that you are barred from communicating to begin with should be your answer.

[figureitout23]

I don't agree with the notion that we don't block people that meant a lot to us. Our relationship was very complicated and I needed to move on with my life. It wasn't cos I didn't care; it was the exact opposite.

 

Please expand.

 

I’m not being condescending, I’m truly asking. It’s not a concept I comprehend. If you cared about someone and simply moved on what’s the point of blocking them? I’m FB friends with my high school and college sweethearts, no reason not to be.

 

Not stating this in an accusatory manner but the only reason I can come up with that isn’t unpleasant ending would be unresolved feelings or manipulation as in a power move and that’s opening a whole ‘nother can of worms... making you reaching out an even more bad idea in my humble opinion.

 

Indifference isn’t hate or love, I post happy birthday on my long gone romantic partners Facebook pages without second thought because I’m just that indifferent, the only reason I even remember is the little reminder on top of my page. That doesn’t mean they meant nothing to me, hell one of them took my virginity, they were important to me and made impressions on my life and who I am today but they are part of the past. This post SCREAMS there’s more going on but if it’s not clear to you, there’s no point in saying as much, just as you said let it go.

[Honeycomb8]

I blocked him because he kept messaging me, and I couldn't do it anymore-being in that cycle of us talking then not. I was emotionally unavailable for ages after we ended and sabotaged things with other people simply cos I still had feelings for him. Just cos you love someone doesn't mean they were healthy or good for you. He was what I needed at the time but our relationship wasn't healthy. It was serious and intense and life changing, yes...But it wasn't healthy the way I wished for it to be. He wasn't a healthy indivdual so those issues were reflected onto me.

 

Anyway, I'm over things now. So there is indifference. It doesn't take away how I do think wishing someone a happy birthday, that once upon a time meant the world to me to be a bad thing. I didn't mean it to be disruptive to his life or malicious or manipulative or a curve ball; it's just meant to say 'hey, I remembered your bday, and hope you have a good one.'

 

We were each other's most serious relationship. But since you guys say don't do it, I won't.