exxx Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 Here's the deal. First of all me and my ex weren't truly going out but we have 6 months of history. I actually broke up with him a while ago but we were still hanging out all the time months later. So it's possible there's some blame for all this on my end and to be honest I more realized my feelings after he ditched me and we did hang out pretty much all the time before regardless. Anyway he ignores for a full week, I try messaging him once then he says he wants to talk. 3 days later I say Hey and he texts me breaking up messages (which I suspected was coming but it still hurt a lot to hear)- He basically wrote a bunch of bs "Hey I'm so sorry I f-d myself over a boy came into my life and now I feel like if i see u it wouldn't be good for his sake i should have seen you before it was serious i regret it and think about it often . it's totally not of you in any way shape or form your an awesome human being and will do great thing" the only two texts i wrote in response was "okay i hear that. i will ahve to move on with my life if that is the case" and "well thank you yeah it sucks. I know was also flimsy about us but you live and learn i guess. im sure you do well too" Ever since then it has been total silence between us. I also think my reaction was too be passive and act like I don't give a kind of like he ignored me the whole week. I kind of regret being so nice though. Now I'm curious if at this point it's been friday since those text messages and he's liked posts of mine since then on Instagram but besides that there has been no contact and I have also stopped posting on Instagram since 24 hours ago and plan to refrain for a while. With that said should I have been more aggresive? I feel like I was way too passive but to be honest I didn't want to give him any satisfaction by pleading for him. Is it better at this point to simply ignore him and show him 0 signs of contact? Also I realize it's possible his new relationship could last so honestly I'm not banking on him coming back necesarialy nor would I let him do so easily if that did it happen. But I have a feeling it must bother him to some degree. I am trying to focus on myself now and forget him though but I'm curious what anyone thinks of this situation. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exxx Posted February 7, 2018 Author Share Posted February 7, 2018 Something I was thinking of maybe to give it to him is if in a month when I get back on Instagram and he likes more of my photos maybe I could message saying that I'm gonna have to block you cause I can't see you as a friend or something like that. I feel like maybe that could give a type of closure or is that a bad idea at that point? Also honestly I don't know what I'll feel like then, maybe I wont care anymore but I guess it could be a nice feeling to kind of shut the door on him as in a way to see after breaking up with me now I'm breaking up with you on social media from being friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jibralta Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 I think it's better to move on. If you need to block him, do so. You don't need to discuss it with him. I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to come back. Sounds like he was messing around with you behind someone's back (and vice versa). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snkv Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 People are actively or passively insidious creatures. This should be a separate class in school. Everyone is selfish, no matter what anyone says. Every creature's basic instinct is survival. Once they see someone that is a hair-pin better (in their eyes) than you, it's all just an avalanche from then on, even though neither of you sense it at first. Learn to be self-sufficient, ignore the idea that someone will make you full. Forget about all movie scenario inflicted romance dreams. Life is hard, and the worst part is realizing that nothing will ever play out the way you expect it to, when it comes to other people. Delete every point of contact, cut all social media contact, everything. THIS PERSON CHOSE ANOTHER FEMALE OVER YOU. HE CHOSE ANOTHER BEING OVER YOU. People are not just material belongings, this person THREW YOU AWAY. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
julius Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 She threw him away though, she dumped him initially. If she wanted him then she should have stayed with him in a relationship. Now she is seeing his worth because he is with someone else lol. Supply and demand rule. As i put on another post, her ego is bruised rather than anything else. If she wants him back she needs to ask him, however do not break the other womans heart because of selfishness, or move on and learn a lesson, to strike whilst the iron is hot before someone else gets in there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exxx Posted February 7, 2018 Author Share Posted February 7, 2018 Thanks for the ideas. I ended up simply blocking him on Instagram, so that is that. It felt pretty liberating honestly and I'm already talking with other guys here and there on OkCupid so that feels optimistic anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
julius Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 blocking him is a good idea, you have to be fair to yourself, him and the new woman. good luck with your dating Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exxx Posted February 7, 2018 Author Share Posted February 7, 2018 Thank you, it's actually him with another guy (gay) but regardless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exxx Posted February 7, 2018 Author Share Posted February 7, 2018 I think it's better to move on. If you need to block him, do so. You don't need to discuss it with him. I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to come back. Sounds like he was messing around with you behind someone's back (and vice versa). Now that you mention it, I am very curious if an ex would ever go back to someone sometime after being blocked on social. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exxx Posted February 7, 2018 Author Share Posted February 7, 2018 People are actively or passively insidious creatures. This should be a separate class in school. Everyone is selfish, no matter what anyone says. Every creature's basic instinct is survival. Once they see someone that is a hair-pin better (in their eyes) than you, it's all just an avalanche from then on, even though neither of you sense it at first. Learn to be self-sufficient, ignore the idea that someone will make you full. Forget about all movie scenario inflicted romance dreams. Life is hard, and the worst part is realizing that nothing will ever play out the way you expect it to, when it comes to other people. Delete every point of contact, cut all social media contact, everything. THIS PERSON CHOSE ANOTHER FEMALE OVER YOU. HE CHOSE ANOTHER BEING OVER YOU. People are not just material belongings, this person THREW YOU AWAY. Thank you. Very true. I usually tend to be someone who tries to view life through the lens of truth but I guess with relationships it's easy to get blind sided. That said, I definitely learnt now how it can go with relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jibralta Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 Now that you mention it, I am very curious if an ex would ever go back to someone sometime after being blocked on social. It happens all the time. I'm always seeing people on this site blocking an ex just to get a reaction. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
figureitout23 Posted February 8, 2018 Share Posted February 8, 2018 Now that you mention it, I am very curious if an ex would ever go back to someone sometime after being blocked on social. I agree with Jilbralta,it works for some it fails for some. I think the most important thing is to be honest with yourself and prepare yourself for the outcome. First off, I think based on your question you want to block or tell him you're going to block to get a response out of him. If you block and it DOESNT get a response, you set yourself back emotionally and it looks immature blocking and unblocking, it shows that they still hold power over you. If you're gonna block, do so because you're ready and you want to move on and you know exposing yourself to him will set you back. If you're doing NC in hopes of reconciliation, I think it's risky to block. Facebook has a hide option. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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