hclarke219 Posted December 25, 2017 Share Posted December 25, 2017 In an almost 2 year off and on relationship. The other week I went to a bar with a different guy who I was just friends with, I picked him up because he doesn’t have a car and invited other girls along but they couldn’t come so it ended up just being the 2 of us. My bf has had a lot of jealousy about this guy but I’ve never had feelings for him. I’ve had plenty of opportunity to have a relationship with this guy in the past but didn’t want it so I never pursued it. I apologized to my bf about it and took full responsibility for my actions as I realize I shouldn’t have invited this guy in the first place. Nothing happened, there was no contact and just friendly interaction and we both went home alone. When I told my bf about it he got mad and broke up with me. Then took a few days to decide if he wanted to get back together, during which I told him I had watched porn since it had been a few weeks since we saw each other. He got mad and said he wasn’t coming back. After awhile he said he would come back but told me he was gonna watch porn because I got to even though I asked him not to (I’m insecure about my body so it makes me jealous). I saw this as him trying to spite me which he’s left me for in the past. He’s done a lot of stuff to me in the past so I said that since he was gonna do that to spite me I was gonna do stuff that he did to me, not bc I was actually going to but to prove a point. He then said he wasn’t coming back and that he was planning on it until I said that. We argued and things got ugly, both said hurtful things bc emotions were high. I made the mistake of begging him to come back and he ended up blocking my number but I’m not blocked on other social media. We’re in an unhealthy off and on relationship so breaking up is just something we do when tensions rise. We’ve done worse to each other and still have gotten back together. I tried to end things on a good note but he said he didn’t believe me anymore. I haven’t tried to reach out since and it’s been only a day. We’ve only been long distance for about 6 months and he was planning on moving back to where I live in a few months after working out things with his job. We used to live together, had a very intense, passionate relationship and both felt like we connected on a deeper level than we could with anyone else. He’s 26 (I’m 21) and has had his share of relationships. We were very serious, consistently talking about marriage (he was going to get me a promise ring) and he always told me how amazing I was and the future he wanted with me, how much better I am than other girls, etc. but the problems mainly stem from insecurity, jealousy, and we both struggle with severe anxiety. My main question is whether or not he will come around and reach out to me if I leave him alone and give him time to cool down. I know this cycle is unhealthy and I’m not asking whether I should stay in it or not, just looking for opinions on his point of view if he will come around or not. I feel that I screwed up but apologized and I don’t think I did anything that was unforgivable as there was no cheating. On one hand we might be more likely to get back together because it might just be another bump in the road but I’m questioning if this might be the last time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hclarke219 Posted December 25, 2017 Author Share Posted December 25, 2017 Also, the guy I went to the bar with I’ve always been strictly just friends with. My ex had brought him up several times and was jealous of him but we never had a past together. Ex wanted me to cut him off completely and I had no reason to since we were just friends and tried to maintain the friendship while keeping it at a minimum to avoid being a b**** and cutting someone off that I had no feelings for. He had asked me out in the past but I turned him down, figured it didn’t matter if he wanted me because I knew my intentions were just friends. And my intentions for the night out was for it to be a group. The most emotional things I’ve ever talked to my guy friend about was advice on my relationship and giving him advice about other girls - which I see as more reason for my ex to have trusted me since I made it clear that I didn’t want anything more than friends and he was pursuing other girls. Since the breakup I cut off the guy friend and told my ex, told him that the friendship wasn’t worth losing him over and he said it was too late. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissCanuck Posted December 25, 2017 Share Posted December 25, 2017 Yeah, he might come back around, but he won't stay. This relationship has already passed its expiration date, so it won't become a permanent union. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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