teylaemmagan Posted December 5, 2017 Share Posted December 5, 2017 Okay. I'm here because I don't know what to do anymore and I need to spill it out. I'm new here, and I don't know how things work, but I hope this helps. I REALLY need some real advice right now. I started university this year. There's this guy that I really like, that I felt connected since the first day. I was like ''Cute!''. Then on the 3rd week we started making eye contact. Like, it was crazy, because I've never experienced something like this before and I liked it. On the 4th week, a tuesday morning, I went to school early. I sit on one of the tables and started listening to music. Then I saw him. He was making his way to the class. 5 minutes later, he came back. And OMG! He was coming towards me. I was talking to myself the whole time. ''Oh my god he's making a move. '' He came and sit beside me. I thought I needed to be polite and I said ''Good morning'' and I smiled. I could tell he didn't expect that. Then we started chatting about hobbies, movies, music etc. We had so many things in common and I was really surprised. So was he. Anyway, we went to class after then (and I couldn't stop thinking about the conversation the whole day) Next day, when I got out of school, I was walking towards the bus station and he was walking with his friends. I was in front of them. When they came where I was, he said ''bye'' to his friends and turned to me. I was like ''Oh my god he's making a move again.'' That day he got on a bus that wasn't going where he was supposed to go. he took the WRONG bus ON PURPOSE. And that was the day I became a wreck. After that day I was afraid I was starting to fall in love, because it's one of my biggest fears. He didn't show up the next day, he went to his hometown, and there was a weekend. Monday was really a long that and I was so tired. When I was leaving the school I was like ''I can't deal with this right now'' so I kinda ran away. And the next day, and the day after that. I knew I was scared. A LOT. Because falling in love was the last thing I needed at that time. I started reading articles, scientific explanations for the feelings I was dealing with. I WAS falling and there was nothing I could do to stop it. And it freaked the hell out of me. After that week whenever he tried to make a move, I ran away. I literally faked a phone conversation just to avoid him. I did this more than once. And I stopped making eye contact too. Because I was getting too excited and I was afraid to embarras myself. I avoided him like hell. This went on for weeks. After some point, I realized that he relized I was taking a step back, and he decided to do the same. He wasn't taking advantage of time class breaks-or anything to talk to me anymore and that made me sad. I knew it was my fault but still. At some point I started thinking, ''He thinks I hate him.'' This situation is really frustrating. We did make some short conversations after that but like , one conversation in 2 or 3 weeks. I think his friends know about the situation and my friends realize there's something too. Anyways, after being scared and avoiding him like hell for 2 months (yes, it's been 2 monhts now) I FINALLY acknowledged my feelings and embraced them. I FINALLY feel comfortable around him. It took me this long because this is the first time I actually fell in love. Zero experience, fears, self doubts, low self- esteem, it all made it so hard for me to get to this point. But I'm glad I know what I feel now. The thing is, he's still staying away from me thinking I hate him, or something. And I realized that I didn't leave any open doors for him to actually make any move. I NEED TO DO SOMETHING. Because the school will be over in 3 weeks and there will be 1 month holiday after that. If nothing happens till then, I know it will fade. I mean it's 1 month. And there's only 10 days left with classes. Now, I need some help and advice because I don't know what to do, and there isn't really something for me to do. I started making eye contact this week again and he realized it, and he didn't expect it, he was surprised. He started doing it too. But that's all and eye contact isn't going to get us anywehere in 3 weeks. ı know he's not gonna make an actual move, I know he won't because he thinks I don't want him to. I have to do something but I'm really out of options here. We're in school only for 4 hours and %95 of it is class. We only have 10 minutes of breaks, and he's ALWAYS with his friends. I'm not good at starting conversations, I know I'll be awkward, and I can't do it when he's with his friends. I just can't. What can I do? What in the world can I do? This is the first time I'm feeling something like this and I don't want to miss it. I don't want to regret it. I never wanted something like this, THIS MUCH before. I've never been so desperate. I'm so desperate that I'm thinking of calling him *accidentally*, to start a conversation. I even thought of bumping into him today. I'm not a brave person. I'm actually a really shy person. But I just HAVE TO do something and I will be brave if I have to. I just can't find a way. Please help. I can't bear this anymore, he's on my mind 24/7 and my heart aches because of the fact that we're not communicating. Like it's a real pain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DanZee Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 All right. First of all you have a crush on him. You're NOT IN LOVE yet. It's a crush. Second of all, WHY DON'T YOU ASK HIM OUT? That will tell you whether he's really interested in you or not. It could be something as simple as grabbing a Coke and a burger, or something more like a movie and dinner. I'm guessing you're about 18. Time to grow up and have an adult relationship. Since you only have a 10 minute opportunity to see him, write him a note, ask him out, and give him your phone number so he can contact you. Stop playing peek-a-boo with him and start communicating with him. He might be shy and you might be doing him a big favor! The feminist movement was 50 years ago, you have the right to ask HIM out. If he's not interested, then you can cool your hormones down and look for another cute boy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teylaemmagan Posted December 6, 2017 Author Share Posted December 6, 2017 All right. First of all you have a crush on him. You're NOT IN LOVE yet. It's a crush. Second of all, WHY DON'T YOU ASK HIM OUT? That will tell you whether he's really interested in you or not. It could be something as simple as grabbing a Coke and a burger, or something more like a movie and dinner. I'm guessing you're about 18. Time to grow up and have an adult relationship. Since you only have a 10 minute opportunity to see him, write him a note, ask him out, and give him your phone number so he can contact you. Stop playing peek-a-boo with him and start communicating with him. He might be shy and you might be doing him a big favor! The feminist movement was 50 years ago, you have the right to ask HIM out. If he's not interested, then you can cool your hormones down and look for another cute boy. Thank you for your answer. I appreciate it. The thing is, I kinda have social anxiety. I mean it’s not so bad but I’ve suffered a lot from it in the past. So, asking him out is not an easy thing for me to do. Almost impossible. That’s why I feel desperate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 Why not hit him up on snapchat instagram fb or other social media? Then start liking some posts or commenting now and then. Put yourself on the radar. Not as bold as a cold approach. The thing is, I kinda have social anxiety. I mean it’s not so bad but I’ve suffered a lot from it in the past. So, asking him out is not an easy thing for me to do. Almost impossible. That’s why I feel desperate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teylaemmagan Posted December 7, 2017 Author Share Posted December 7, 2017 Thank you. I texted him yesterday and we chatted for hours. It’s not something big, but it’s a progress. It’s the best I can do right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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