Remoolb Posted October 19, 2017 Share Posted October 19, 2017 I've been dating this girl for two months now. We're very in love and she makes me so happy. But... (1) she cuts herself and has eating problems. This wouldn't be a problem if I wasn't just three months clean from self harm and just got out of two clinics, lots of therapy,and, I only just stopped purging. (2) She gets insanely jealous of my friend, let's call her Emma. Emma and I used to like each other but we realised it would've been terrible for us to date. Now, when my girlfriend gets jealous she gets anxiety, her bad self esteem nags at her, she thinks of the worst but most of all, she starts to resent me even though I did nothing and Emma and I are just friends now. I can't mention Emma at all. (3) She'll obsess over her eating and I can see her going down a dark slope. I love my girlfriend so much. She makes me so happy and she treats me so well. I want to stress that, she's so great to me. It hurts me to think of her hurting. What do I do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rosephase Posted October 19, 2017 Share Posted October 19, 2017 break up. She is a threat to your own newly won stability. You have to take care of yourself first, before you can start to think about taking care of other people. Her issues trigger yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweetGirl28 Posted October 19, 2017 Share Posted October 19, 2017 You should break up. Not only is she a threat to herself, she will drag you down again. Love her from afar. I'm dealing with this right now with my daughter and her ex BF. They are 14. Whatever dating is at 14, lol, more like saw each other in school and supervised hang outs. He was insanely jealous and felt threatened buy her male friends. One recent night on snapchat he made her watch while cutting himself, saying she caused it. Luckily I happened to overhear it. He then threatened suicide. After gently expressing my concerns she did end it. He is still manipulating her, I'm fortunate she trusts and confides in me so that I can keep her from allowing it. Your gf's issues and behaviors are not owned by you, they are hers. Just like you owned your behavior. I'm glad you sought help. Be strong, take care of you, and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pippy longstocking Posted October 19, 2017 Share Posted October 19, 2017 You are two very vulnerable people who have subconsciously attracted one another because of the intense similarities in your lifes . You are both impulsive and addictive and this manifests in the deep love you feel you have after only two months and the intense jealousy she is showing , this will only get worse . You sound like you are well on your way to recovery and the road is long as you know , but you have got on the right road . For her however , she is still in that place and it will affect you hugely . You two together are like a recovering alcoholic going out with a bottle of vodka ... I fear for you that if you let this relationship go on , her personality and what she is showing is very typical of people who then use emotional blackmail to prevent someone ending it with them . As for Emma , I have a certain degree of empathy with your girlfriend on that one ..you and emma are NOT just friends ..there was an attraction , that is hard for most to get over but for someone who is emotionally unstable it is nigh on impossible to get passed . I may be assuming many things with my post , but in short , I would seriously re think this . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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