elloihallvard Posted June 19, 2017 Author Share Posted June 19, 2017 Maybe we could do something tomorrow? That is not a concrete date. However: The bottom line is that he's likely given up on you because you are taking things too slow for him and your coldness he has had enough of. It takes two people to make a relationship work... not just the guy to jump through hoops for you. If you wanted to communicate more through text message in between your dates then I guess you're going to have to request such a thing, initiate some of the contact and not "act" anyway but rather communicate your needs in a way that is not over-the-top or pre-mature. He's likely moving on or doing the slow fade on you. Did you contact him and ask him if you were still on to do something together on Sunday? I asked him Sunday night and said maybe you realized things werent working out between us? So I wanted to make him talk and say something because I see this change in his behaviour like no good night text anymore and no texting at all during these 2-3 days. He responded and said noo..thats not the case. and trhat he had to work. But nobody works on Sunday I know he wasnt working. And then asked but about next weekend If I will be here. But a cold conversation. Do you think it is over now? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tygerlyly53 Posted June 19, 2017 Share Posted June 19, 2017 I asked him Sunday night and said maybe you realized things werent working out between us? So I wanted to make him talk and say something because I see this change in his behaviour like no good night text anymore and no texting at all during these 2-3 days. He responded and said noo..thats not the case. and trhat he had to work. But nobody works on Sunday I know he wasnt working. And then asked but about next weekend If I will be here. But a cold conversation. Do you think it is over now? You are not being ghosted if he is still responding and talking to you. The man I was seeing for the last five months has stopped responding to me and haven't heard from him in 9 days. We talked every day or every other day until last week when he just disappeared. That is ghosting and it is devastating. : ( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted June 19, 2017 Share Posted June 19, 2017 What? People do work Sundays. I genuinely don't understand what you're upset about. Not to mention, if there weren't problems, you're certainly creating them now with your insane insecurity! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elloihallvard Posted June 19, 2017 Author Share Posted June 19, 2017 You are not being ghosted if he is still responding and talking to you. The man I was seeing for the last five months has stopped responding to me and haven't heard from him in 9 days. We talked every day or every other day until last week when he just disappeared. That is ghosting and it is devastating. : ( It is not ghosting but breadcrumbing. I wont see you in two weeks cause I have to work, I wont text you but I'll reserve a date with you for the next weekend, just to have you as a reserve, in case I dont have someone else. They are being too mean, but what is the point of discussing such small things? If someone does this to you, you never care. Text a " off" message smile and move on. Then focus on yourself and improve it. Do things for yourself like reading, having fun, learning new things and at the end someone better will come to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tygerlyly53 Posted June 19, 2017 Share Posted June 19, 2017 It is not ghosting but breadcrumbing. I wont see you in two weeks cause I have to work, I wont text you but I'll reserve a date with you for the next weekend, just to have you as a reserve, in case I dont have someone else. They are being too mean, but what is the point of discussing such small things? If someone does this to you, you never care. Text a " off" message smile and move on. Then focus on yourself and improve it. Do things for yourself like reading, having fun, learning new things and at the end someone better will come to you. I agree I need to move on but I am stuck on why he didn't even think I deserved an " F off" message from him. Instead I have no value so he just went silent. I imagine he met someone better. There's ALWAYS someone better than me... 😔 Breadcrumbing sucks as well. I hope he either steps up or gives you a reason and moves on. Whatever you want to happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capricorn3 Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 I don't know about others, but quite frankly, if you treat someone coldly then expect to get ghosted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boxingguy Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 Overly passive-aggressive. Talk about it with him, or cease the relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 I work on Sunday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thealchemist Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 If you want to date someone then date them, don't play childish games. You want him to know what you are thinking without letting him know what you think. You act a way because you think it will get you the desired outcome, instead of passive aggressive manipulation try have a conversation. Also, I work on Sundays frequently, why so you think that no one works on Sundays? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatwasThen Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 There's ALWAYS someone better than me... 😔 Op: I agree with the others in that you need to stop with your passive aggressive way of communicating and learn to spell.it.out. If this sort of thing is happening to you often then you have to agree that you are the common denominator and you need to change up your dating modas operandi. Did you have sex with this man? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annia Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 It is not ghosting but breadcrumbing. I wont see you in two weeks cause I have to work, I wont text you but I'll reserve a date with you for the next weekend, just to have you as a reserve, in case I dont have someone else. They are being too mean, but what is the point of discussing such small things? If someone does this to you, you never care. Text a " off" message smile and move on. Then focus on yourself and improve it. Do things for yourself like reading, having fun, learning new things and at the end someone better will come to you. But why do you hold off your plans for the weekend if there isn't a specific plan? You could still do your life and plan things on Sunday that are not related to him. If he came to talk to you about the date you could say that you ended up getting other plans or stuff to do. I've learned (through my mistakes) that I can't hold my life for vague plans or leave a day vacant just in case someone wants to be with me. And this doesn't mean that these people are bad... I do that with my friends who I love also and who also do concrete plans with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annia Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 You are not being ghosted if he is still responding and talking to you. The man I was seeing for the last five months has stopped responding to me and haven't heard from him in 9 days. We talked every day or every other day until last week when he just disappeared. That is ghosting and it is devastating. : ( Hold on strong. I was once ghosted after five months too, out of nowhere. But in my case a lot of time later he texted me again like nothing had happened after him having expressed to a mutual friend that he was shocked and oblivious to why I ended up deleting him from my social media (lol?). It hurts but it does get better, I promise. Take the ghosting as the answer and closure that you needed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cope Posted June 20, 2017 Share Posted June 20, 2017 I've learned (through my mistakes) that I can't hold my life for vague plans or leave a day vacant just in case someone wants to be with me. And this doesn't mean that these people are bad... I do that with my friends who I love also and who also do concrete plans with me. Amen. NEVER hold back your life for anyone that's a "just in case" NEVER. Learned from my mistakes too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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