Bubblegum2991 Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 I am trying to get out of an abusive relationship. The abuse is largely verbal. There have only been a few isolated incidents in which he has laid hands on me. We have 2 children, under 5, and I am trying to get out of this situation. I need help in finding a place to stay and childcare. I actually get free counseling through my EAP benefits at my company. However, I can not find any of this sort of help. I tried calling women in distress and they weren't at all helpful. In fact they just kept putting me on hold, and telling me they could not help me. Does anyone have any suggestions or resources? This would be greatly appreciated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WithLove Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 You can start by calling the non-emergency police number in your area. They should be able to direct you to the right resource. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gebaird Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 I'm so glad you have made the decision to leave. Do you have family you can turn to for assistance? This might be helpful: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 Some things, you'll have to do on your own like this. It's your job to look for a place and daycare. Ask your employer about day care and contact some realtors about apts. You live with him and he watches the kids so you'll have to adjust to this. However that's not all you'll have to do. Contact an attorney about leaving and what the ramifications may be as well as visitation/custody, etc. He doesn't work, you're supporting his mr mom choice so you may end up paying child support. There are much more urgent and dire cases than yours, so you won't qualify for a shelter, etc. You'll have to begin by stealthy severing things and contacting an attorney about your specific situation. Domestic violence agencies handle the neediest cases first, not just those who expect someone to browse through apt. ads and daycare centers.I need help in finding a place to stay and childcare. I actually get free counseling through my EAP benefits at my company. However, I can not find any of this sort of help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 Your kids will thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubblegum2991 Posted February 6, 2017 Author Share Posted February 6, 2017 Some things, you'll have to do on your own like this. It's your job to look for a place and daycare. Ask your employer about day care and contact some realtors about apts. You live with him and he watches the kids so you'll have to adjust to this. However that's not all you'll have to do. Contact an attorney about leaving and what the ramifications may be as well as visitation/custody, etc. He doesn't work, you're supporting his mr mom choice so you may end up paying child support. There are much more urgent and dire cases than yours, so you won't qualify for a shelter, etc. You'll have to begin by stealthy severing things and contacting an attorney about your specific situation. Domestic violence agencies handle the neediest cases first, not just those who expect someone to browse through apt. ads and daycare centers. I am fully aware that finding a place and childcare is my responsibily to find a place and childcare. Its just that I also recognize that the childcare situation is going to change drastically. He will be difficult about helping me in anyway, which I know from experience. Affording a place on my own is one thing, and I can possibly manage that. Childcare is an entirely different story. I realize that there are maybe no programs aimed to help people like me. After all, you can survive verbal abuse right? But I have to ask. Just in case. Because right now, I will honestly take all of the help I can get. There is no point in being ashamed to ask because everyone seems to agree that I need to leave. When it comes to actually doing it, the fact is I will be alone. Its pretty terrifying. Thanks everyone for the suggestions. I will probably just end up pulling up my big girl panta for this though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reinventmyself Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 I am so sorry you are facing this. Do you have family or friends near by? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubblegum2991 Posted February 6, 2017 Author Share Posted February 6, 2017 I am so sorry you are facing this. Do you have family or friends near by? Ya I do. My mom is kind of running a full house, but I know she wants to help any way that she can. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qwaspolk82 Posted February 7, 2017 Share Posted February 7, 2017 I am fully aware that finding a place and childcare is my responsibily to find a place and childcare. Its just that I also recognize that the childcare situation is going to change drastically. He will be difficult about helping me in anyway, which I know from experience. Affording a place on my own is one thing, and I can possibly manage that. Childcare is an entirely different story. I realize that there are maybe no programs aimed to help people like me. After all, you can survive verbal abuse right? But I have to ask. Just in case. Because right now, I will honestly take all of the help I can get. There is no point in being ashamed to ask because everyone seems to agree that I need to leave. When it comes to actually doing it, the fact is I will be alone. Its pretty terrifying. Thanks everyone for the suggestions. I will probably just end up pulling up my big girl panta for this though. Then don't depend on him for anything. Get a lawyer. Get custody. Get child support set up but be prepared you might get nothing. You can't depend on him to help at all. You have to figure it out for the sake of your kids. It will be tough. But the resources provided should help you finding employment or low income housing etc. Abuse is abuse. Doesn't matter if it's physical or not and he said he has physically assaulted you. Yes you do have to put on your big girl pants when kids are involved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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