Sportster2005 Posted February 5, 2017 Share Posted February 5, 2017 Here is the final draft. One happy, passionate, man whose life is wonderful seeks one and only one happy passionate woman who loves her life to bits and wants to share. My mission here is to meet a friend, a lover, a confidante. A partner to explore life with. Someone to embrace adventure with. A lover and friend to grow old with. A woman to protect from whatever they need protecting from. Live music and and guitar playing are competing and complementary passions. Talk of alternate tunings is the ultimate pillow talk for me. What is yours? My photography enables the observation of all the stories around us. All the world's a stage. There is beauty all around us, when we choose to pause and search for it. My preference is to be a traveller, not a tourist. Running, sometimes marathons gives me immense satisfaction and joy. The endorphin rush is immeasurable. Logging hours in the gym keeps me disciplined and strong. Mentally and physically. I hope to be in this body for some time to come. Getting the most out of it is a priority. Would love to compete in ballroom dance someday. It’s a stretch goal, starting this late in the game. Easy goals are no fun. Currently dancing a few hours a week. An eclectic mix of latin and ballroom. Thinking of taking some swing classes next. Want to dance? Correcting people that mix up “there” and “their” doesn’t make me smarter. It makes me a bore. Falling behind in conversations about popular culture is something happens to me often. The sound of falling rain is the most peaceful and romantic thing in the world. Let's stay in bed and listen. Do you believe as I do? Honesty without discretion is cruelty. Maintain the dignity of the other person, even if they sometimes don’t deserve it. Never say words in anger that can never be taken back. Hold people when they cry, no matter why they are crying. Be kind to everyone, you never know what struggles they have. Dauntless is my search. We will meet, we will live happily ever after. I’m serious. I’m funny too. My cat laughs at me all the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 I like it! A bit too much on the references to sex and being in bed for a profile (would work fine once you get to know the woman!) (and not trying to correct but I'd add "that" before the word "happens" in the line about pop culture. Really well written, compelling and inspiring! (especially if you leave off the Abe Lincoln quote below lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 6, 2017 Author Share Posted February 6, 2017 I like it! A bit too much on the references to sex and being in bed for a profile (would work fine once you get to know the woman!) (and not trying to correct but I'd add "that" before the word "happens" in the line about pop culture. Really well written, compelling and inspiring! (especially if you leave off the Abe Lincoln quote below lol) Thanks Batya. I was a little concerned about the 'staying in bed line'. Consider it stricken. I agree, "that" does belong. Really appreciate the input Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 Thanks Batya. I was a little concerned about the 'staying in bed line'. Consider it stricken. I agree, "that" does belong. Really appreciate the input I really, really like it -when I was dating through on line sites I likely would have responded. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 I like it a lot! Agree with Batya on the reference to pillow talk and being in bed. Otherwise, great profile! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 6, 2017 Author Share Posted February 6, 2017 I like it a lot! Agree with Batya on the reference to pillow talk and being in bed. Otherwise, great profile! Thanks !!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 6, 2017 Author Share Posted February 6, 2017 I really, really like it -when I was dating through on line sites I likely would have responded. I would have been honoured. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 I would have been honoured. LOL I don't think so - I would have been too direct about the marriage/kids thing. Ironically, I stopped dating in 2005 in August of that year but from January-August my on line dating accounts were mighty active/busy. I liked the style of profile you have the best as far as who I was most likely to contact. My husband had an online dating profile for a short time. And there was one reason I never ran into him on line before we got back together. He listed his primary language as English (true!) but mistakenly listed French only when it came to what he would like a potential date to speak (he speaks some French but of course didn't mean to list it that way!). So we never came up in each other's searches lol. I digress only because it's so easy to make a mistake like that (I once had a match.com account where by mistake I checked off "Mormon" as the only religion I would date --and my religion was not Mormon. A few days later I wondered why I only got viewed by one person and only matched with him in the entire major city I was living in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
journeynow Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 Sounds good! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abitbroken Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 Do you want to get married someday? Do you want kids (with a slightly younger woman - to adopt or have bio)? A woman to protect from whatever they need protecting from. No. you don't want to attract women who are looking for a rescuer and can't handle their own life. Talk of alternate tunings is the ultimate pillow talk for me. How about "the ultimate coffee talk?" Also, are you employed? Can you say "i work in a creative field" - "i travel a lot with work" - "i work in a profession i feel passionate about". Women want to know you aren't some dude who is a wannabe rock star living in mom's basement. They don't want to know your income, but want to know you are a responsible person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 Do you want to get married someday? Do you want kids (with a slightly younger woman - to adopt or have bio)? A woman to protect from whatever they need protecting from. No. you don't want to attract women who are looking for a rescuer and can't handle their own life. Talk of alternate tunings is the ultimate pillow talk for me. How about "the ultimate coffee talk?" Also, are you employed? Can you say "i work in a creative field" - "i travel a lot with work" - "i work in a profession i feel passionate about". Women want to know you aren't some dude who is a wannabe rock star living in mom's basement. They don't want to know your income, but want to know you are a responsible person. I did wonder about the protection thing, whether that would attract the wrong people or alternatively turn off people who identify themselves as independent and capable of holding their own. I like the "ultimate coffee talk" suggestion, could be that or something similar. Good to mention briefly about work, just so women know who they're dealing with. I never mentioned marriage or children on my online dating profile, other than listing "long term relationship" in the what you're looking for section, also answering questions (on OKC) that is consistent with wanting marriage and children. Men I've met never mentioned marriage or children on their profiles either, but I general can tell from reading their responses to questions on OKC. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 I did wonder about the protection thing, whether that would attract the wrong people or alternatively turn off people who identify themselves as independent and capable of holding their own. I like the "ultimate coffee talk" suggestion, could be that or something similar. Good to mention briefly about work, just so women know who they're dealing with. I never mentioned marriage or children on my online dating profile, other than listing "long term relationship" in the what you're looking for section, also answering questions (on OKC) that is consistent with wanting marriage and children. Men I've met never mentioned marriage or children on their profiles either, but I general can tell from reading their responses to questions on OKC. Different strokes -I made it clear I was only looking for marriage/children and only responded to men who were looking for the same thing. I met over 100 men in person, was in contact with hundreds of men, most of whom contacted me (I wrote in my profile "if that is not what you are looking for I wish you well and feel free to move on to the next profile") Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reinventmyself Posted February 6, 2017 Share Posted February 6, 2017 Awww. . Loved it. Can't improve on that. It's as good as it gets. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 7, 2017 Author Share Posted February 7, 2017 I was surprised that some women I've tried talking to before, are showing an interest. I have lost about 25 pounds since I was last on there. Almost all of it belly fat and around the hips. I also started lifting weights and am getting nice and toned. That and I have had such great advice writing my profile I'm really excited about one already. But I'm trying to keep my expectations low. It's a case of too fast. We have talked quite a bit in the past. Going back quite a while, now that I think of it. We never seem to meet. Usually that has been my fault, I think. It was definitely me the last time. I stopped talking to her to pursue, ahem, someone else. She's OL. I think she's 45? Very attractive, and has a positive disposition. She's from Columbia. Dances Salsa, yaaayyyyyyyy. We are going to meet next Monday for coffee. We're both very busy. She texted me a bit tonight. HT is one I met in 2013. We went on a motorcycle ride. I called her a couple of days later and left a message. She never returned it. Over the years I would see her online. Would send a message, not returned. Most of the time, I would just ignore her. She emailed about an hour after I created the profile. I'm not so sure about her. I guess I don't know why for sure she wants to talk all of a sudden. And through or emailing she revealed she lives quite far away. About an hour ish. I don't have two hours to travel to see anyone. Will continue talking. KM She was at the dance studio. Saw each other on Match. That was last summer. She stopped dancing a few months ago. We went for a walk/diner last summer. I asked her out again. She said "she was busy". Didn't pursue. Some mixed signals after that. We had a good rapport. I emailed her. I was genuinely interested in how she was doing. Positive response. Said it was great to hear from me. I ended my last email by saying it would be nice to grab a coffee. I'm not sure how I meant it. I would like to have a coffee with her again in any context. We'll see. Added a couple of favorites. Emailed them. If I don't hear in 48 or so I'll email a couple more. I think that's it. OL is the front runner so far. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 7, 2017 Author Share Posted February 7, 2017 Feeling a little overwhelmed. Texting a bit with OL KM agreed coffee would be good. Will set time and date. She's the same height as me, but always wears heels. I don't care if she doesn't. Chatting with HT. Maybe drive halfway on the weekend for a coffee.??? Hard to imagine this one. I'm not available Saturdays until about 13:00, and 14:00 on Sunday. And Sunday I usually need to crash. I've done my Sunday morning long run, and hour of Salsa class. Started talking to another one that is very funny and attractive. HM. She goes to the top of the list with OL for now. Another emailed me, EP. Very attractive, excellent profile. Seems a bit too serious for my taste. Two other women who used the "Meet Me" function look very promising. One is probably the most attractive woman who has ever shown an interest. But I don't think we are a good match. She wants a travel partner, I want a dance partner. I don't have the freedom to globe trot right now. I may still message her. The other one is even more attractive. She just wants to date, but she says it could lead to more. Will definitely check her out. There's more, but I don't have time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 8, 2017 Author Share Posted February 8, 2017 Asked HT if she wants to go for a coffee. Going to call OL tomorrow during the day to chat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 8, 2017 Author Share Posted February 8, 2017 Interesting. After last year I thought KM's interest was low to non-existent. We went on, what I thought was a very pleasant date. It went from a coffee to a walk to a pub for super. I asked her out again, she said she was tired. I never looked back. I think I have a tendency to be decisive when I shouldn't be, and indecisive when I should be. She remained friendly to me when we were at the dance studio. One day the studio put on a dress rehearsal for an upcoming competition. They're awesome to watch. We chatted a bit while we were there. She commented I was dressed lightly, given how cool the room was. I made a comment about burning hotter than the average human. She made a quip about me being "hot" in general. I thought she was just being flirty friendly. My thinking was, she didn't want to go out again, so no matter what she does, she's not interested. Another flaw in my dating. I tend to look at interest in black and white. And once they show non-interest I'm done. Which really sucks, because black and white thinking doesn't belong when it comes to the complex and sometimes subtle world of emotions and dating. When I mentioned coffee earlier I was kind of feeling her out. She said something to the effect "that would be nice". With the ball in my court I was going to suggest something this weekend. She took the initiative though and emailed me this morning asking if I was free this weekend for coffee. I was pleasantly surprised. I offered a time and place. I don't know when I'm going to find time to tend to my other emails. I think I will just try to keep in contact once a day to the ones I'm interested in. The truly interested ones will bubble up to the top. The so-so ones will fall off the list. KR. She emailed me and asked where a picture was taken on my profile. I never know if this types of emails are interest, or are they just asking a question. So I only provided a curt answer. Another reason I kept it brief is her preference is for a man taller than me, and in a higher income bracket. She replied to my answer. I decided to pursue a bit. I'll let her reject me, instead of rejecting myself. I would have contacted her earlier, but her preferences kept me away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 8, 2017 Author Share Posted February 8, 2017 KM is confirmed for 1:00 on Saturday. Kind of surprised, but not going to second guess it. It will be nice to see her again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 12, 2017 Author Share Posted February 12, 2017 That went pretty well. It didn't dawn on me until later, KM was the last woman I went out with. After that I took a much needed break. She didn't cause the break. She looked really good. I was a little surprised. I know she's a good looking woman, but she brought it today. Very sharply dressed. Her demeanor was a little different than last time. She seemed more relaxed and more authentic. More laid back. We had a few good laughs. Very few awkward pauses. I think we talked for two hours. Good signs of interest. Some light touching of my arm. Lots of eye contact. I reciprocated. The cafe was close to where she lived. I offered to walk her home. Last year she stopped about half a block from where she lived. She didn't want to reveal where she lived, understandably. So I joked I'll work her as close as she feels comfortable. She laughed and said don't be silly. I walked her all the way to her home. It was a little awkward. I didn't want to make a big deal of it, but I was curious as to what happened last year. I said, "I'm not sure what happened last year, I'm terrible at reading things". She said not to worry about it at all. Then she said something to the effect. "I was/am all over the place". I'm hoping she said was. But I'll find out soon enough. I asked if she would like to go out on a real date next weekend. She said "yes, I'm sure we can find something to do". I asked for her number, and she gave it to me. Will text her a couple of times during the week. On Thursday try to firm up some plans. I need to block of some time tomorrow. I have received some awesome emails from some presumably great gals. I find during the week I'm too busy, and then I'm too tired. The trail may have gone cold on a few of them, or all of them. That would be too bad. But that's where I am right now. Received kind of a weird one today. She said she initially wasn't attracted to me, because I'm blonde. Then she said "To be honest, you looked too old for me, but you seem confident that it won't bother you." She did say something about my profile didn't seem like a young person's profile. It was more poetic and blah, blah, blah, would you like to talk? Ummmmm that would be a no. I'm not concerned she initially wasn't attracted. I'm concerned she's not smart enough to realize she added nothing by saying those things. Am I supposed to feel honored she overlooked my blond hair, and old looks? She's 47. Her pictures are very vague. Can't tell what she looks like. Found that ironic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 13, 2017 Author Share Posted February 13, 2017 Talked on the phone for over an hour tonight with OL. I really enjoyed talking to her. It was natural. We seemed to get along just fine. We were originally going to meet for lunch, but it looks like the city is going to be closed down. A major snowstorm is on the way. Even the government is shutting down, and transit, and schools and malls. We agreed it might be irresponsible to venture out on the roads. We are going to play it by ear, for the rest of the week. Still haven't responded to any emails. Match sent me an interesting email. It compared my activity with what "successful" users were doing. It said I sent ten emails less than a successful user, but received one more than a successful user would receive. Meh, I would rather be receiving more, than sending more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 13, 2017 Author Share Posted February 13, 2017 The city is cancelled today, and by extension coffee with OL. Fired off a quick text to KM. Took her a while to respond. She stated she did respond earlier, but didn't send it. She offered that unprompted. I don't expect immediate responses. Well, under most circumstances. Just simple 'hi how ya doin' texts can wait. I finally dealt with some emails. I responded "I'm not getting less blonde or younger", to the one that said she found me too old looking, and typically didn't like blondes. Said no thanks to a few more. I did respond to KR. She's high on the list. Runner and singer. Blonde, athletic body. Very well written profile. Quite a bit of compatibility. She emailed me back a couple of hours later. Which actually kind of annoys me. I'm done with online for the day. I like it when women take a day or two to respond. I find instant turn around times create unneeded pressure. Relax gals. l I might tend to some pof emails this afternoon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 14, 2017 Author Share Posted February 14, 2017 I had some interesting emails with KR. In retrospect her quick turn around time made sense after I read it. She sent me an email explaining some frustration and outright asked me if I was truly single. It struck me as a little negative. But I cut her some slack. This is her first time dating online and she had two very negative experiences over the weekend. The other amber flag, that may get upgraded to red, is she has only been single for nine months. It was a 37 year relationship. Yikes, as I right that and do the math, I may have to backtrack on this one. Probably won't get out to see OL tomorrow. Much of the city will still be shutdown while we get dug out. I'm actively engaging three women right now. I want to talk to another before she loses interest. If she already hasn't. Shouldn't have hesitated. Well, timing. I reached out to OL and KM. KR came later. I don't like missing an opportunity, and I don't like talking and dating to a bunch of women at once. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 15, 2017 Author Share Posted February 15, 2017 Texted OL over an hour ago. The streets are clear. Asked her if she wanted to meet tomorrow. I'll see what happens in the morning. If I don't hear from her by lunch, I'll send another text. I will text KM tomorrow. Try to make some plans for the weekend. Something simple. She likes blues. There's a very popular blues matinee on Saturdays. KR is away for ten days, but we are keeping in touch. I think she's the frontrunner. I'm not used to this. She seems to be the right level of interest. Not too strong, but making a good effort. It's comfortable. I like it. For some reason I feel absolutely no anxiety with her. No insecurity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IAmFCA Posted February 15, 2017 Share Posted February 15, 2017 This is so much fun! Sat down and read to here all at once. Love it. Came over to say HVD, S! Oh, and yes, my OLD success changed dramatically with 20 pounds gone. I was surprised. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sportster2005 Posted February 15, 2017 Author Share Posted February 15, 2017 I did receive a response from OL this morning. She apologized for not texting last night. She said she was too busy this week to meet. That's fine. I will keep in touch. If next week doesn't happen, then I think I will move on. I don't care if women are not interested, or if they are truly that busy. The end result is the same. You don't get to spend any time with them. I don't want, or require a lot. But if you can't meet for an hour over a three week period, it seems pointless to be dating. She is a single mom. I think she has him a %100 of the time, and he is only 11. I empathize it might be hard for her to meet. But maybe we are just in two different places in our life. Need to set some time aside after dance tonight to do some email. Especially KR. I'm not excited about asking KM out. I will. If she initiated a text I might be more interested. So far she's very quiet this week. Hi ITIC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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