Opinions on FWB (Friends with Benefits)?

[Edmund Exley]

Yeah like around 100 years ago... LOL

 

What are you suggesting though? That sex prior to "relationship" never leads to an actual relationship?

 

I don't think that is true anymore. In fact, many men (NOT all), including men who have posted on message forums like this, won't even consider a relationship until they have had sex with a woman.

 

Not players, good honest decent men.

 

As for me, I have had sex with every single long term boyfriend I have ever had prior to a "relationship," a RL that lasted YEARS.

 

Heck, my ex (the six year guy to whom I was engaged) and I had sex the first night we met.

 

Two dates later he asked me to be exclusive.

 

I do think that may be true for some guys, but certainly not all. Not in this day and age anyway, jmo and experience.

 

HE apparently gave HER a lot of attention too, texting/talking all night, discussing future, so it went both ways, which is how it's supposed to be.

 

I dunno I am sure he had his reasons. Perhaps HE was a commitment phobe ... plenty of guys are. So are many women!

 

But who knows.

 

Im not suggesting sex first doesnt lead to long term. Hell me and my wife did it on our first date (we had been talking and kinda knew each other from the past) but yes there are guys, and girls, who will keep coming back just for the sex, not caring if the other person is catching feelings.

[rayfutz]

Is it possible? What do you think makes it successful? Would you do it?

I guess I don't understand why you are asking the question. Is it possible? I mean yeah, people do it. What makes it successful? Um, sex. If you mean turning it into a relationship, I cant give advice cause success rate on a turnover like that is so low, its really not worth typing out reasons. Would I do it? Well, I believe in commitment, and even if I wanted to do a FWB thing for a while just for fun or pass time, it will weaken my own commitment standards and view of relationships. Ive seen how its damaged a lot of relationships, even if just 1 partner did that in the past. In real life, over and over, not just thousands of horror stories you can read on forums like this. So no, I would never even consider a FWB arrangement.

 

Sex like that isn't worth the troubles that typically follow. If you need examples, just keep reading on this website and see how it damages trust and connection in relationships once someone wants to settle down

[Doc Blaze]

depends on what your definition of FWB success is...