The Cold One Posted October 15, 2016 Share Posted October 15, 2016 I just started attending college and I have developed a crush on someone , I'm insanely insecure and has zero idea about how can I talk to her , and it's kinda more difficult because I live in a third world Arabian country where culture kinda tightens the social interaction between females and males (although it started to loosen up recently , especially in higher social classes) , but still I think I'm quite unattractive(physically) and in terms of personality I'm really nothing special or noticeable , I'm not smart or funny or talented at anything , I'm not even good at talking . I'm quite young and inexperienced (only 18 ) so I'd really appreciate any advice .(bear in mind the culture part please , thanks ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wordsleftatsea Posted October 15, 2016 Share Posted October 15, 2016 We miss 100% of the shots we don't take. You're a young guy, just started college, your life is just beginning. Use this as an experience, if nothing else. If I were you I would strike up a conversation with her. Be the most confident form of yourself. Ask her to dinner and drinks at a specific place and time. Women like it when you plan things out. If she says she can't and doesn't give an alternate date/time, give her your number and tell her to contact you if she wants to go out. Basically, put the ball in her court. Hopefully she says yes though. Take a deep breath and be brave. Best of luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aspencer Posted October 16, 2016 Share Posted October 16, 2016 Hi!! Totally agree ^^ a guy asked me out when I first got to college and we ended up being best friends! If anything it could lead to a best friend or maybe it will work out! You will always sit there wondering what would or could have happened. Have fun in college you don't HAVE to have someone, a lot of people forget that have fun!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catfeeder Posted October 16, 2016 Share Posted October 16, 2016 If you're all that shy, I'd put less pressure on myself. I'd go about making friends 'around' the crush, and I'd allow myself to grow into feeling more socially comfortable over time. From there, I'd pursue getting to know the girl and see what happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Cold One Posted October 18, 2016 Author Share Posted October 18, 2016 Hi catfeeder, thanks for the response. I'm not really shy and I've already made some friends, it's just her that I was scared of talking to , although yesterday I managed to just do that , it was in the Graphic Design tutorial and we were working on our drawings next to each other and I just asked her about some stuff regarding the drawings , but I don't know how to actually be friends with her without crossing any of the cultural boundaries , worlsleftatsea suggested I should ask her out , but practically that'd be extremely awkward and inappropriate unlike in the more open western culture where it's perfectly acceptable in most of cases , I also don't know how talk to her when she's surrounded by her friends (which is most of the time) , it's confusing and as I said I really have zero experience with these stuff and each step feels like dilemma to me :S Note: she seems to be sorta more open minded than most of the other females in the community, it's just that I don't know how to determine her boundaries exactly . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someday_Soon Posted October 24, 2016 Share Posted October 24, 2016 For now, keep discussing things related to your studies and eventually you will be able to jump into other conversations as you become more comfortable with her. She may even be the one to approach other topics as well, and then you can continue to build your comfort level and normalize conversations that have nothing to do with school. Eventually that will lead you to find out what you want to know about her personal boundaries. The key is to try to talk to her as often as possible (without being too pushy) until you becomes like friends with her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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