SunshineHeart Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 my friend used to love me. a LOT. for a very long time but i always told him i was unsure of my feelings towards him. we decided to carry on speaking but i realised that i actually did like him too (only recently). i dont think i handled it that well to be honest because i messaged him a lot. he pushed me to tell him and i made it very clear that i also liked him a lot. he said he wasnt interested even though it was only very recently that he was so in love. when i saw him, he acted as he always does and seemed very interested, he came to meet me from a far distance. yet he keeps saying he isnt interested. i am always realistic in these situations and for some reason i dont believe him. he said he wants to focus on himself and stay away from me for a while and hes deleted my cell phone number and me on social media because he said i take up a lot of time now i really want to rekindle whatever was there. do you think that is possible? the stuff he has told me showed he is so in love and when i asked him about it, he said he would take those things back now. i feel like he's giving me a taste of my own medicine almost. but i dont care, i just want him back. any advice would be appreciated Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jibralta Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 I think it's a dead end. But if you don't care, then go for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 It sounds like he was only interested in the chase and when you fell for him he lost interest. And it seems you are too, now that he's lost interest you want to chase him. This is not love it's a cat-and-mouse game. Find local guys where there is simultaneous mutual interest..that would be more like dating and relationships than this long distance tag game. he keeps saying he isnt interested.he said he wants to focus on himself and stay away from me for a while and hes deleted my cell phone number and me on social media because he said i take up a lot of time ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moodindigo91 Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 I think a general timeline would be helpful to sort of gauge things. You say he used to love you a lot for a very long time... how long? And how long ago was it that he was very much still in love with you and expressing it? And exactly how long has it been since you realized you felt the same way? It could be that he's giving you a taste of your own medicine, but given that you say he was madly in love with you for a long time, you'd think he would up at the chance to be with you when you finally caved. The fact that he isn't tells me that maybe he's moved on and you're too late. But like Jibralta said, if you don't care, then go for it. I guess you have nothing to lose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkellyWoozle Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 ..And you want to be with someone who plays mindgames. ..? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunshineHeart Posted September 28, 2016 Author Share Posted September 28, 2016 I think a general timeline would be helpful to sort of gauge things. You say he used to love you a lot for a very long time... how long? And how long ago was it that he was very much still in love with you and expressing it? And exactly how long has it been since you realized you felt the same way? It could be that he's giving you a taste of your own medicine, but given that you say he was madly in love with you for a long time, you'd think he would up at the chance to be with you when you finally caved. The fact that he isn't tells me that maybe he's moved on and you're too late. But like Jibralta said, if you don't care, then go for it. I guess you have nothing to lose. It was about a year and a half that he loved me for and it was half a month ago apparently that he stopped. He treated me so well too when he liked me. I think he is afraid of commitment because it would take up his time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reinventmyself Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 when i saw him, he acted as he always does and seemed very interested, he came to meet me from a far distance. yet he keeps saying he isnt interested. Was this an electronic relationship and you two just recently met in real life? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunshineHeart Posted September 28, 2016 Author Share Posted September 28, 2016 Was this an electronic relationship and you two just recently met in real life? No we met regularly actually because of work Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pippy longstocking Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 I think he is playing head games and I suspect if you back right off and detach from him , the chase will once again start . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunshineHeart Posted September 28, 2016 Author Share Posted September 28, 2016 I think he is playing head games and I suspect if you back right off and detach from him , the chase will once again start . I'll be honest. I think I can get over him even though it's extremely painful right now. I'm finding it hard to get over him because he treated me absolutely perfectly the whole time - bar a few times when he would bring up my past just to prove his own points if we argued. I don't know how I can be treated as well ever again. That scares me a lot. At least with my ex I knew he treated me very badly. How do I move on from that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pippy longstocking Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 I'll be honest. I think I can get over him even though it's extremely painful right now. I'm finding it hard to get over him because he treated me absolutely perfectly the whole time - bar a few times when he would bring up my past just to prove his own points if we argued. I don't know how I can be treated as well ever again. That scares me a lot. At least with my ex I knew he treated me very badly. How do I move on from that Sometimes you have to focus on the bad just to get you over that first hurdle . I was only posting on here the other day about this to another poster ..her ex didn't do ANYTHING bad , it made it hard for her and mine too ..he was a beautiful man and I sometimes wished he had been a monster haha just to give me something to work with. So although I preach positive stuff mostly I do think in reality it does help to recall the bad bits and that is what you need to do ..he might have been the sweetest man ever , but you saw the other side , and it must have been a shock actually ...all this loving until you finally * surrender and then he doesn't want to know . I would take that as his * other side , and quite frankly it is cruel and very much a mind game ...nah you don't want that in your life . It is also a huge rejection and I think it would make any one of us pine for all the yesterdays when he was so nice ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nas1984 Posted October 6, 2016 Share Posted October 6, 2016 my friend used to love me. a LOT. for a very long time but i always told him i was unsure of my feelings towards him. we decided to carry on speaking but i realised that i actually did like him too (only recently). i dont think i handled it that well to be honest because i messaged him a lot. he pushed me to tell him and i made it very clear that i also liked him a lot. he said he wasnt interested even though it was only very recently that he was so in love. when i saw him, he acted as he always does and seemed very interested, he came to meet me from a far distance. yet he keeps saying he isnt interested. i am always realistic in these situations and for some reason i dont believe him. he said he wants to focus on himself and stay away from me for a while and hes deleted my cell phone number and me on social media because he said i take up a lot of time now i really want to rekindle whatever was there. do you think that is possible? the stuff he has told me showed he is so in love and when i asked him about it, he said he would take those things back now. i feel like he's giving me a taste of my own medicine almost. but i dont care, i just want him back. any advice would be appreciated Hey thanks for your sharing What do you wait of him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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