no contact, or stick around and let thing develop?

[Zuzii]

My ex and i have been broken up for almost 4 months after 2 1/2 years together. The first 2 months of the break up i starterted working on myself lost alot of weight got in touch with friends and would hear from the ex every few weeks we brefly hung out a few times for about a week and hooked up which got messy so i went no contact for a month and randomly started getting contact from him again.when we first saw eachother after the month of no contact he told me how bad things have been hes been drinking alot and all that but hadnt drank for about a week and was trying to do better in school basically get himself back on track. We talked alot he was surprised i hadnt moved on and said he still loves me and always will and wants to marry me but is afraid of hurting me. We talked for hours towards the end of the night he took my hand and said i need to chang things and i know i have to get you back. We agreeded to start seeing eachother casually once ina while and he seemed so eager to see me the next day. About a week later we are hanging out and he brings up how i we are friends and he wants to get back with me but knows he isnt ready yet and will mess up which im okay with i know we need time and i want to take things slow. But he kind of confused me because he would say like i wanna marry you but i need time but then go on a say i know you can find someone who will sweep you off your feet without the bull that goes on with me. I think he hasnt forgiven himself for our relationship ending even though ive forgiven him, i believe he thinks that he needs to lower himself and doesnt deserve me or something but im not sure. But he said he still wants to see me and wants us to do fun stuff together just take it slow for now. Im just a bit confused weather this is like we are just friends or we are building a relationship over and hes probably just as confused. I dont know if at this point its better to go no contact and let him figure himself out but thats scary im scared he will think i moved on like he did before and just think he doesnt have a chance, or i can keep seeing him and see how things develop between us as we spend more time together but im worried that puts me in the friend zone. Im not sure what to do i really dont wanna lose this guy.