SunshineHeart Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 Hi. I haven't posted for a while and I'm feeling a lot better than I did the last time I posted because I'm making myself busy with work. Today I just need a bit of validation that I made the right decision and inspiration. I'll briefly list what happened with my ex. I don't get into relationships unless marriage is on the card and he knew that very well: - he promised me everything I wanted as long as I was patient with him and wait a few years - he treated me well for the first few months and was romantic and made me fall in love with him sooner than I would've liked because of what he said - he was planning our future and the next day he suddenly out of nowhere told me he didn't love me - even though he had that same day - I wanted to break up with him so so much despite loving him. He told me to stay and that things will get better as long as he can talk to more girls whilst with me (I don't believe in being friendly with other girls outside of a work setting at all when you're with someone) - he said he didn't think I would leave him - he started to insult me and bring my past up a lot and I would cry everyday - he started talking about marriage again and I stayed - everything was getting back on track and he told me to wait for him because he will love me soon - he left to go to work (long distance) and started going out without telling me, posting pictures very close to girls and texting girls (which I discovered after breakup) especially one girl - his friend sent me a video my bf had sent him showing girls at his house - he was ignoring me for days and not telling me where he was + saying he was busy when I wanted to talk - I was treading eggshells as I didn't want to leave him but ultimately I told him I wasn't happy so he said I don't see a future with us - Despite talking about how excited he was about our next few years together - I decided to break up with him, but I was too weak to do it when I saw him so he did it, but I asked for him back. He said we'll trial again. He was hurting me so much that I broke up with him a few days later and he agreed. Very easily - he insulted me to my friends with some bad allegations I know I did the right thing. I need others sometimes to tell me maybe that I do deserve better and that I'll find better. I'm still heartbroken. I've been on no contact for a while so that's good. I find it so hard to accept that someone who was so pushy talking about the future and loving me could leave so easily Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
confusedchel12 Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 My ex promised me the world, was amazing with me but he just one day changed, I wasn't happy then, he started putting his life and friends before me, we split up and for few months after he used me for sex and to help him get used to life without me. I've not seen him for 5 month but been 2 month nc, seen a picture of him on fb today and it's made me cry how happy he looks. I'd never break no contact and I don't think you should. You really have done the right thing, if they loved us they wouldn't have treated us that way, keep it up ☺ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 Generally, we have to remember that promises of marriage after dating for only a few months are a red flag. It's not really normal because you don't know the other person very well yet. I would just caution you to recognize that in the future. It just seems like you were not a good fit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jobelle Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 You absolutely did the right thing and you are so much better off!! There are so many reasons to break up with him, I don't even know where to start. I'm so glad you got rid of that loser. You should be proud of yourself! You do deserve better, and you will find someone who loves and respects you and wants to be with you and you only. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hazyillusions Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 If someone talks marriage anytime before a year, I would be skeptical. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunshineHeart Posted February 22, 2016 Author Share Posted February 22, 2016 If someone talks marriage anytime before a year, I would be skeptical. He moved on from the relationship the easy way - by cheating and finding a girl who lived close to him. I'm the one stuck here now with no intention of dating for a long time because of work commitments and he's having the time of his life. Thing is, I always knew I deserved better and I gave him the benefit of the doubt. He exploited the fact that I stayed with him for an ego boost and now he thinks I'm lower than him and he's so much better than me. That hurts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LovelyDani87 Posted February 22, 2016 Share Posted February 22, 2016 I feel your pain, I stuck around my ex for an entire year after our break up, it seems I helped her move on while now I'm in 3 weeks NC in misery, but I continue to tell myself this feeling can't last forever. Just know that you're not alone dealing with some sort of heart ache and to hang in there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunshineHeart Posted February 22, 2016 Author Share Posted February 22, 2016 I feel your pain, I stuck around my ex for an entire year after our break up, it seems I helped her move on while now I'm in 3 weeks NC in misery, but I continue to tell myself this feeling can't last forever. Just know that you're not alone dealing with some sort of heart ache and to hang in there. you know, im just so so embaressed that I asked for him back and tried to make him nostalgic about us after I broke up with him. Thing is, I know i deserve better but the week after the breakup, I had never gone through that kind of emotion in my life - of loss and betrayal - and that made me do that. I still feel like he 'won' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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