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Online site "last online" etiquette


Brokenheart99

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So what's the etiquette for logging back on to a dating site after you have been on a first date with someone, especially when there is a time stamp and you can see when the person logged in? I know early on in online dating, you assume everyone is talking to many people and there is no exclusivity yet, but it still seems like poor form/rude to log on right away. And it also might lead your date to believe you aren't interested in them because you're already back online looking for others? What do you guys think?

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Yes, logging in right away will definitely make the other person think you weren't quite happy with them or the way the date went. But then again, in my short experience with online dating sites, nobody ever cared about what I thought, they went online right away after the date (and so did I!) because when it comes to online, the lines get blurred. I don't think there's an etiquette in place, everybody does what they want, because it's mainly a numbers game and until both parties establish they want to date exclusively and delete their profiles, everything goes. It's less about feelings and more about efficiency and numbers. That's how I realized online dating isn't for me lol.

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Do what feels right to you, if you think they will be hurt to see you log in quickly after and you liked them enough to worry about that, don't log right back in and wait a bit, maybe contact them again have a talk about how they see the etiquette on that also. I have never done OLD so I wouldn't know from personal experience.

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If I met someone online, went on one date, and they had a problem with me logging into the site the next day, that would actually creep me out. The last few people I met on dating sites immediately deactivated their account after I sent them a message. That seemed kinda weird to me.

 

If you want to log in, then log in. If you don't, then don't.

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So what's the etiquette for logging back on to a dating site after you have been on a first date with someone, especially when there is a time stamp and you can see when the person logged in? I know early on in online dating, you assume everyone is talking to many people and there is no exclusivity yet, but it still seems like poor form/rude to log on right away. And it also might lead your date to believe you aren't interested in them because you're already back online looking for others? What do you guys think?

 

Create another dating profile (generic, no pics), and use that right away. You can then take your time in logging in with your regular profile (if you find someone else to contact for a date).

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Years ago that's how you were able to measure the success or lackthereof of a first meet 'n greet.

If they didn't log on or at least slowed down their activity it was seen as a sign of interest.

 

Heck, nowa'days I've had guys log in during the date, maybe while in the restroom and still call me the next day.

Don't overthink it. . Just live in the moment and manage your expectations. . that's about all you can do.

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Until you are exclusive, I think it's best to assume the person is dating (online and/or in person).

 

So as not to drive yourself crazy, I wouldn't check up on their profile to see when they were last online.

 

In short, the only etiquette is to stop going to the dating site when you are exclusive and/or in a relationship.

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It depends what level of dating experience the person you met is "playing" at.

 

The girl I met and who I'm currently with was going on 1st and 2nd dates with multiple guys off of match.com ...and so was I. I emailed her first and on her 2nd message exchange she asked if we could meet up for dinner&drinks. She preferred to meet guys up front rather than waste days emailing back and forth then meeting a dud.

 

We clicked pretty well..and after our 5th date and became exclusive.

 

 

I also want to add she's the coolest girlfriend and had the most sexual history out of any of my past relationships. Im 39 and in search of my best friend so I'm not worried about her notch count.

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If I met someone online, went on one date, and they had a problem with me logging into the site the next day, that would actually creep me out. The last few people I met on dating sites immediately deactivated their account after I sent them a message. That seemed kinda weird to me.

 

If you want to log in, then log in. If you don't, then don't.

 

Often if they block you, it appears like they have deactivated their accounts.

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