The Random Thought Thread, Part 6

[Coily]

5 hours ago, ShySoul said:

Have you seen it directly? Any chance you could talk to him?

Not that his mom would mislead you, but there are always multiple sides. Something may be going on in the marriage that others aren't aware of. Unless it comes from the source, I try to keep an open mind.

My brother dealt with a messy situation between his wife and our mother. Neither woman helped matters. Both made good points and both were way off on others. Put my brother in a tough spot. I wonder what your friend is going through and how he feels. Maybe he could use a friend like you?

Hope things are ok for him. And if you need any support, you know where to go. Take a break from giving sage advice and be on the receiving end.

I've seen some of it first hand,  through some social media, from his extended family and very rarely from my friend (on his commute is the only time he can talk freely all 25 minutes). It's rather a bizarre and troubling change to see in the guy I've known most of my life.

Let's just say after the gaslighting extravaganza I received on here in the past on this topic, I will keep it on the random thoughts threads. Haha

[Batya33]

1 hour ago, Coily said:

I've seen some of it first hand,  through some social media, from his extended family and very rarely from my friend (on his commute is the only time he can talk freely all 25 minutes). It's rather a bizarre and troubling change to see in the guy I've known most of my life.

Let's just say after the gaslighting extravaganza I received on here in the past on this topic, I will keep it on the random thoughts threads. Haha

I'm sure he knows you are there for him as a confidante. You are such a good friend and I'm glad you are in touch with his mother.

[ShySoul]

11 hours ago, Coily said:

I've seen some of it first hand,  through some social media, from his extended family and very rarely from my friend (on his commute is the only time he can talk freely all 25 minutes). It's rather a bizarre and troubling change to see in the guy I've known most of my life.

Let's just say after the gaslighting extravaganza I received on here in the past on this topic, I will keep it on the random thoughts threads. Haha

Hope he is okay and can come out of it. I'm sure you're a good friend to him and he knows he can talk to you. Good luck with it.

[yogacat]

Give me the strength to be there for my father during this difficult time.

Help me to be a source of comfort, strength and support for him.

Give me the words to say and the actions to take to show him how much he is loved and how much he means to me.

Help me to be patient, understanding and empathetic towards him.

Give me the wisdom to know when to give him space and when to offer a helping hand. Let me be a source of light in his darkness, and guide me to be a constant presence in his life.

Help me to cherish every moment I have with him, and to make lasting memories together. I pray for his healing, both physically and emotionally.

Give me the courage to face this situation with strength and positivity. Give me the grace to handle any challenges that may arise.

[ShySoul]

20 hours ago, yogacat said:

Give me the words to say and the actions to take to show him how much he is loved and how much he means to me.

Help me to be patient, understanding and empathetic towards him.

As someone who had a mixed relationship with his father, I had to repeat everythng you said to myself countless times. As much as you love them, sometimes it can be difficult.

Whatever you are going through, you have the all the strength, courage, and compassion inside of you. Hope things turn out well.

[yogacat]

1 hour ago, ShySoul said:

As someone who had a mixed relationship with his father, I had to repeat everythng you said to myself countless times. As much as you love them, sometimes it can be difficult.

Whatever you are going through, you have the all the strength, courage, and compassion inside of you. Hope things turn out well.

Thanks shys, I hope it does too 🙂

It's hard when you have a mixed relationship with a parent, I did with my father when I was younger but we've both grown and mended our ways. He became such a supportive rock for me and I wish the same for you too! 💮

[ShySoul]

49 minutes ago, yogacat said:

Thanks shys, I hope it does too 🙂

It's hard when you have a mixed relationship with a parent, I did with my father when I was younger but we've both grown and mended our ways. He became such a supportive rock for me and I wish the same for you too! 💮

He passed away end of 2018. Don't think things were ever fully settled, but I at least came to terms with what happened and don't have any kind of anger or resentment to hold me back. For all his faults, I know he loved as best as he was able. 

Glad the two of you fixed things. Always nice to hear postive outcomes

[yogacat]

28 minutes ago, ShySoul said:

He passed away end of 2018. Don't think things were ever fully settled, but I at least came to terms with what happened and don't have any kind of anger or resentment to hold me back. For all his faults, I know he loved as best as he was able. 

Glad the two of you fixed things. Always nice to hear postive outcomes

Oh, sorry. Not being around here long enough to know. My condolences. I'm glad though that you have found a way to make peace. Not always easy to do so. 🤍

[Capricorn3]

Just lost all respect for someone I always thought was so cool.  Just goes to show that you never truly know someone.  Very disappointing. Ugh.

[itsallgrand]

It was said a while ago but it still bothers me when I am reminded of it: someone who is an acquaintance saying that animals have no souls while a dog was there on a leash as part of the group chatting. He identifies a lot with his religion but to me that is no excuse, even though his sect teaches that animals are here simply for human use. 

To me, it's a giant red flag about this person. He gives me the icks now. You've rationalized not seeing animals as fully living things according to your own beliefs, that seems a bit sociopathic to me.

 

[Batya33]

2 hours ago, itsallgrand said:

It was said a while ago but it still bothers me when I am reminded of it: someone who is an acquaintance saying that animals have no souls while a dog was there on a leash as part of the group chatting. He identifies a lot with his religion but to me that is no excuse, even though his sect teaches that animals are here simply for human use. 

To me, it's a giant red flag about this person. He gives me the icks now. You've rationalized not seeing animals as fully living things according to your own beliefs, that seems a bit sociopathic to me.

 

Ug what an awful thing to say and why even say that? On the flip side I'm sometimes treated with disrespect and dangerously by people who have their dogs off leash or block entrances to buildings with their dogs such that I'd have to be inches from a strange dog just to enter a building or store.  I also wonder why those who keep them off leash risk them being taken/dognapped. I like dogs fine- adore cats- and I don't like dog owners who choose to put me, others and often their dog at risk.  

[itsallgrand]

1 hour ago, Batya33 said:

Ug what an awful thing to say and why even say that? On the flip side I'm sometimes treated with disrespect and dangerously by people who have their dogs off leash or block entrances to buildings with their dogs such that I'd have to be inches from a strange dog just to enter a building or store.  I also wonder why those who keep them off leash risk them being taken/dognapped. I like dogs fine- adore cats- and I don't like dog owners who choose to put me, others and often their dog at risk.  

Right? The guy seems off.

And absolutely, no one has to like dogs or any animals and people need to respect someone who doesn't want to be near them for any reasons . 

In this case, it wasn't like that at all. There were no issues or anything, he just casually mentioned how dogs don't have souls. It was the weirdest thing honestly. 

 

[Batya33]

4 hours ago, itsallgrand said:

Right? The guy seems off.

And absolutely, no one has to like dogs or any animals and people need to respect someone who doesn't want to be near them for any reasons . 

In this case, it wasn't like that at all. There were no issues or anything, he just casually mentioned how dogs don't have souls. It was the weirdest thing honestly. 

 

Terrible and creepy! I like certain dogs and have loved certain dogs.  I don't like dog owners who act irresponsibly and put me in harms way.  I mean when my son was young and ridiculously adorable I didn't assume that random people would want him running in front of them or blocking them from entering a building even if they liked kids lol.  

I'm sorry you had to be around this person.  Ugh.

[ShySoul]

Have multiple friends who have been chased by and even bit by dogs without a leash. It's crazy to do that. Have a little courtesy and stop putting people in danger. 

Few weeks ago friend was volunteering in a library. Despite the rule clearly listed saying no dogs, they brought in a large dog with no leash into the small bookstore, with young children sitting on the floor looking through books. When asked to please take the dog outside, he claimed it was a service animal. Person was clearly not disabled and could not explain why the dog was needed. He just insisted the library had allowed him to bring the dog in before, so he should be able to now. Yet when my friend went to confirm with a librian, he took off. If he was in the right, why run away?

Treat people with more respect and watch over your pets. And don't take advantage of rules set in place for people who actually do need things like service animals.

 

[ShySoul]

On 7/31/2024 at 8:05 AM, itsallgrand said:

You've rationalized not seeing animals as fully living things according to your own beliefs, that seems a bit sociopathic to me.

Just because we may not speak the same language as them, or that they are different then us, doesn't mean they don't have souls. They are living beings and should be respected as any other living being should. You're right, there is something really wrong with that.

Any pet owner will deal you animals feel just as much as humans and carry the same emotions. I don't even have a pet, but I've seen enough Youtube videos to know that. And the way my squirrel friends look at me, I know there is a soul and heart with real feelings inside of them.

[BeaTlesFan77]

[Batya33]

5 hours ago, ShySoul said:

Have multiple friends who have been chased by and even bit by dogs without a leash. It's crazy to do that. Have a little courtesy and stop putting people in danger. 

Few weeks ago friend was volunteering in a library. Despite the rule clearly listed saying no dogs, they brought in a large dog with no leash into the small bookstore, with young children sitting on the floor looking through books. When asked to please take the dog outside, he claimed it was a service animal. Person was clearly not disabled and could not explain why the dog was needed. He just insisted the library had allowed him to bring the dog in before, so he should be able to now. Yet when my friend went to confirm with a librian, he took off. If he was in the right, why run away?

Treat people with more respect and watch over your pets. And don't take advantage of rules set in place for people who actually do need things like service animals.

 

Thank you. I was bitten in 1992 by a dog I did know who was on a leash actually in the home -my boyfriend's home -he lived with parents.  Unprovoked. I had a generalized fear of all dogs for years after. I had to go to the doctor and get a tetanus shot. I've been chased/leaped up at/had to leave playgrounds with my son because of off leash dogs.

I hate -have had to do this twice last few weeks -to ask a dog owner to please not block and entrance to a store with their dog so that I have to pass by within inches.  I was mindful when my son was young of not letting him do that or run around like in a restaurant or store and get in people's way and he never bit or barked (well, loud but not barking loud LOL).

And yes we have the same issues in public spaces.  I've been invited to volunteer at a library nearby (my branch closed for 6 months-year for reno!) with the nonprofit I sometimes volunteer with -like to have a  table/give out swag.  I'm going to try to do it schedule permitting.  I really miss volunteering -been over a year.  Pandemic really shut down the main thing I did although for a few months I called senior citizens weekly to see how they were doing - different one each time from a provided list (meaning they wanted the calls).

[ShySoul]

11 hours ago, Batya33 said:

I've been chased/leaped up at/had to leave playgrounds with my son because of off leash dogs.

Why I will always before cats. They generally leave you alone.... unless it's dinner time.

Haven't been chased or attached, but had several bark at me for just walking by them. Stayed with my mother for Christmas once and could barely go out of my room as their chihuahua would not stop barking at me. That was a fun week. 🙄

Used to volunteer in the evening for the library but the stores hours changed after the pandemic. Now there are no evening shifts and I have to work during the day. Don't get as many opportunites to help out as I would like.

[Batya33]

9 minutes ago, ShySoul said:

Why I will always before cats. They generally leave you alone.... unless it's dinner time.

Haven't been chased or attached, but had several bark at me for just walking by them. Stayed with my mother for Christmas once and could barely go out of my room as their chihuahua would not stop barking at me. That was a fun week. 🙄

Used to volunteer in the evening for the library but the stores hours changed after the pandemic. Now there are no evening shifts and I have to work during the day. Don't get as many opportunites to help out as I would like.

My husband and I grew up with cats and cannot have one now.  I totally agree! Oh -I used to volunteer at my son's school library reshelving books -bc if I would volunteer where he could see me he'd want to come home/cry!

[Capricorn3]

11 hours ago, Batya33 said:

 I was bitten in 1992 by a dog I did know who was on a leash actually in the home -my boyfriend's home -he lived with parents.  Unprovoked. I had a generalized fear of all dogs for years after. I had to go to the doctor and get a tetanus shot. I've been chased/leaped up at/had to leave playgrounds with my son because of off leash dogs.

^ I can so relate to all of this. Without fail, every single time I walk on the beach I get chased or leaped on by dogs off their leash. Every time. What makes it so bad is that there are signs everywhere for "Dogs Must Be On A Leash".  Not a single "dog person" takes note.  And it really P*&%$# me off when the owner comes up all smiles and happy and laughing and saying "oh he's just being playful, he won't hurt/bite you" etc.  Yeah right. 🙄 Your playful dog just ripped my clothes by jumping up on me, and yes, actually scratched my arm drawing blood.
No matter where I am dogs bark at me and come after me.  I make sure to always cross the road if I see a dog coming my way.  I head in the opposite direction etc.  I do everything I can to keep away and steer clear of dogs.  I am terrified of dogs. ALL dogs. No matter how small or big.  I have never ever had a good experience with dogs. Ever.  Ugh.  Not a fan.

[Batya33]

28 minutes ago, Capricorn3 said:

^ I can so relate to all of this. Without fail, every single time I walk on the beach I get chased or leaped on by dogs off their leash. Every time. What makes it so bad is that there are signs everywhere for "Dogs Must Be On A Leash".  Not a single "dog person" takes note.  And it really P*&%$# me off when the owner comes up all smiles and happy and laughing and saying "oh he's just being playful, he won't hurt/bite you" etc.  Yeah right. 🙄 Your playful dog just ripped my clothes by jumping up on me, and yes, actually scratched my arm drawing blood.
No matter where I am dogs bark at me and come after me.  I make sure to always cross the road if I see a dog coming my way.  I head in the opposite direction etc.  I do everything I can to keep away and steer clear of dogs.  I am terrified of dogs. ALL dogs. No matter how small or big.  I have never ever had a good experience with dogs. Ever.  Ugh.  Not a fan.

Same. Same with the owner’s comments too. I let them take the elevator first especially if I have a bag of food. I’m no longer scared of all dogs. Thank goodness. I was for so long. For 19 months during Covid I only did outdoor exercise. Same 6 block back and forth route multiple times because it was dark out and this was safe. One day I saw an off leash dog no owner come out from an apartment building garage. He wasn’t chasing me but saw me so I had to keep crossing back and forth to avoid. Not fun. Scary too. One of the times I did call our non emergency line because he could have been run over. Later that week on my Nextdoor site I saw a reference to a dog that seemed to be same dog. But that is such a fear of mine. Encountering that situation. I feel so vulnerable. And no I only stop exercising when I’m done. Not because of an obstacle. So it makes it even worse. Thanks for your validating post and I’m sorry you’ve been in those situations!

[ShySoul]

Sorry both of you have had such bad experiences.

On a related topic, owners clean up after your dogs! Especially when  there are bags provided and a trash bin right there. No one needs to see your dog's waste on the ground. Practically everyday in my community I walk by this and it's just disgusting. 

[Batya33]

My issue is when -not many times -I've been accused by dog owners of not being a dog person/liking dogs -no I like certain dogs and I don't like when dog owners put me in harms way.  I was very sad when my friend's older dog had to be put to sleep because I'd visited her and Sophie just basically curled up by me most of the visit.  I had a dog owner during a loooong elevator ride keep telling another dog owner about me "she doesn't like dogs" -the dog had been big and leaping as we got on so I took my little petite body way in the corner to avoid being leapt on. I repeated to her "I do like dogs I don't like being leapt on." 

I do understand when cats and dogs are part of the family -don't adopt one if you're not committed.  (like the pandemic puppy issue now).  I have a friend who might not go with the family to take her son back to college in a few weeks because her cat needs complicated diabetes treatment at home.  She acknowledged that if she also worked outside the home she's just not sure if they could maintain this regimen.

[yogacat]

As much as my relationship with my sister is strained at times. I love her very much.  She recently sent me flowers after I was in the ER and has been messaging me that she loves me and everything will be alright with respect to me and our parents.

So today, I am grateful for her love and support ❤️even when we may not agree on certain things. I am grateful for her efforts to maintain a relationship with me and for always being there for me when I need her. Seeing her at my side gives me a sense of comfort and reassurance. Despite our differences, she is still my sister and I am grateful for her presence in my life.

[yogacat]

On 8/1/2024 at 11:36 PM, BeaTlesFan77 said:

I've seen baby yodas (oh, their big, sparkling eyes and odd-shaped furry ears are so cute) but never quite understood how they originated from Adult Yoda. 

Reminds me of this cute little fella from Gremlins. Or the cat 'puss n boots.' I am a sucker for big, saucer-like pleading eyes, I will admit. 🫠