Hazyillusions Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Was hanging out in town today around the waterfront with guy friend, while chatting away and in hysterics I happen to see the guy I'm dating (been abit over a month and a half) walking with colleagues coming in our direction. I say hey and start laughing nervously? Didn't give him a hug bc he didn't seem like he was going to give me one. Told him I had a strange feeling I was going to run into him today and introduced frd and guy vaguely. Guy looked caught off guard abit and I really didn't know what to say (normally we're never awkward with each other) bt today ended up being really awkward. My friend greeted him with a what's up, they shook hands bt he looked uncomfortable. I laughed nervously out of irony bt after walking away felt mortified. Anyway, besides acting less than composed, what should I do to possibly rectify the situation? Am I overthinking. Was he thinking I was possibly dating my friend? Link to comment
wlh22 Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 You have been dating a month and a half so probably a manageable situation. Every guy would get some level of supiscion about your interst level in him (and/or the guy friend) based on what you described. If you really like this guy, you should just let him know that "hey, just to be clear, the guy you met today is blah blah just a friend and we were doing blah blah. I really like you and you have nothing to worry about etc...." of course this is without me knowing all the details of your 1 and a half month so you can be a better judge of the situation. I remember I was dating a girl briefly and I saw her having coffee with a guy friend. I still don't know what she was doing.... Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 There is nothing to rectify. You are allowed to have male friends. Link to comment
Hazyillusions Posted February 11, 2015 Author Share Posted February 11, 2015 Well we've had 6 full day dates so far. So not like afternoon dates bt whole day hang outs. He seems like he's really trying to get to know me, bt seems alittle wary based on past baggage. We haven't gotten physical, and I like that. He's a really good guy. I just thought i acted like an idiot. Bt that's cos I was thinking 'what are the odds...?' ^ even if he looked caught off guard? So I don't need to explain. Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 I was once out to dinner with my entire family...and walked past my bf having dinner with a woman. I said hello..he introduced us..and I followed the group to the table. They were still there on the way out...and I said good bye...it was awkward. Turned out it was a client/cousin. Shake it off. Link to comment
Hazyillusions Posted February 11, 2015 Author Share Posted February 11, 2015 So no need to clarify anything? He knows I'm dating other people, but yeah...That's a whole other topic altogether. I did text him afterwards though. Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 It's not like he saw you kissing someone else. I wouldn't mention anything unless he asked. Link to comment
Denguin Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 So no need to clarify anything? He knows I'm dating other people, but yeah...That's a whole other topic altogether. I did text him afterwards though. I think you have to be the judge of that. I think it would be understandable if he was insecure about the situation, and you should be able to tell by any change in attitude towards you. If he's truly interested in you, I'm sure the thought of you being on a date with your friend has crossed his mind. For now, I would act like nothing happened, but if you detect something is off (or he asks), tell him this guy is just a friend. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 If you are dating others no need to clarify. What if he runs into you while you are on a date? Would you tell him that? Link to comment
DancingFool Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Yes, I think you do need to clarify since you acted like you were caught doing something bad. It's fine to date and have opposite sex friends. If the guy you are dating has a problem with that, then I would rethink the idea of dating him. Don't make his issues your problem. As for the future, maybe just be calmer and more direct, "Bob I want you to meet my good friend Jim." or colleague, co-worker, client, customer, etc. You are liable to find yourself in these situations from time to time. A simple introduction that briefly places a person and their connection to you does wonders. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 I agree that you should say something because of the way you acted. Deep breathing/being a good actress works well in those situations. Link to comment
suhbliem Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Chances are yes he thinks that may be another guy you're dating. I think you need to be clear to him in a sweet way that he was just a guy friend. If your dating interest is still not ok with it even though your guy friend is just a friend, then the dating interest may not be so valuable after all. Link to comment
manyworlds Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 So no need to clarify anything? He knows I'm dating other people, but yeah...That's a whole other topic altogether. I did text him afterwards though. So if you're dating other people and he knows, what's the big deal about him seeing you with your "friend"? Even if he assumes he was one of your other "dates." Sure, it's uncomfortable. If he decides to bail, don't be too surprised. Is he "dating" other women and how do you feel about that? Link to comment
Hazyillusions Posted February 12, 2015 Author Share Posted February 12, 2015 Its not about it being a big deal. As i said I was thinking about him and how coincidental it would be if I saw him that day. He works around there bt the business area is pretty spread out. Well I know he went out once or twice with another girl very recently and I don't see it being a problem. For one thing I'd be a complete hypocrite seeing I've hung out with the other guy for 2 months. We're both taking our time properly getting to know each other and not rushing it. He's a really great guy and I really like him, he's different. I'm guessing based on what you wrote, you're not the type that would be cool with dating around? Link to comment
manyworlds Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 I'm guessing based on what you wrote, you're not the type that would be cool with dating around? If I were cool about it, I'd let everyone know, and not get embarrassed when the inevitable or likely happens. I'd be cool about it! Link to comment
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