digital fiction Posted January 16, 2005 Share Posted January 16, 2005 Well, this poem wasnt well thought out of. Its late at night, I've been racking my brain for a good poem (I liked the first lines of my poem so I knew I couldnt stop). As many of you know, I am young (twelve years old) and its late at night so forgive me if the poems not 'up to scratch' I guess you could say. I'll always be changing my poems, this is I guess, my first draft. Haha. Anyway I am open to comments and feedback, mature feedback lol. Here goes... I woke up in the dark I woke up in the rain I woke up in the eyes Of yesterdays pain (Pause) Blood hurtles below Tears begin to show Mind beings to fall fall Soul begins to call call For someones heart! For someones hand For one new start! From a true demand (Pause)(Pause) My hearts was crushed My voice was hushed My confidence once struck By my own bad luck But now, I found love 'Found new born hope... 'Found help from above Royal Rain (Wipes away my pain) (Wipes away my shame) (Wipes away my pain) (Wipes away my shame) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delaurence23 Posted January 16, 2005 Share Posted January 16, 2005 at this rate at 12 you got amazing talent the poem was great keep going.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrandonBo Posted January 16, 2005 Share Posted January 16, 2005 that was good from the heart enter that in some competitions if i was you good job Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digital fiction Posted January 17, 2005 Author Share Posted January 17, 2005 Thanks, much appreciated. This one actually took a while to do, so I'm glad my drafts good so far. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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