should i give it up?

[avustt]

i have been dating this guy for 6 months, basically what happened is he broke up with his gf oof 6 years and started dating me. he doesent want a gf but anyone would say he acted like my boyfriend. hes always with me we do everything together, we have a strong bond. well im started to really fall for him, hes perfedt for me and we have the perfect relationship except for the commitment part. he is still friends with his ex but she recently told him she cant handle talking to him and seeing him and his family as she was very close to his family. hes having a hrd time dealing with the fact that hes losing his best friend, the only girl hes known. they broke up before hes been with other girls! hes says he doesent want to date other girls that hes happy with me, but he doesent want me all the way. i dont ave a problem with this too much, i know we really care for each other and have strong feelings for one another. but do u think hes having a hard time letting her go becasue he misses her? or becasue he really does see her as a friend and doesent want to lose that? should i back off so i dont get hurt? or stay around and see what happens give him time? what if im really suppose to be with him? im very confused and hes very confusing! any advice would be great!

[tiger_lilies]

It sounds like you've reached a boiling point...meaning you want to give him an ultimatum. Either her or you.

 

It's not fair for him to have you but "not all the way". In fact, it sounds like you are his backup plan. You are there to console him when he's down, provide companionship (which he would be feeling very lonely with out you I'm sure) and all other aspects of a gf/bf relationship. Yet, he says he doesn't want a girlfriend...that usually means that he doesn't want to put in the work/effort/commitment to strive for a healthy long term relationship.

 

This sooooooooo unfair to you. Maybe the only way for him to come to terms with the ending of his last relationship is for you to back off of him for a while so that he can feel the pain of not having you? This is just a suggestion based on your post.