Blue Spiral Posted June 20, 2015 Author Share Posted June 20, 2015 Well, I made the mistake of talking to my ex, again. I swear to god, it's like we're an old married couple--we talk about the most routine/monotonous stuff imaginable. (By her choice, not mine. As ever, she does most of the talking.) It isn't just her, though; I've had the same problem with other women my own age. I try to have a conversation with them, and the stuff they talk about...look, I know that I'm a bit immature, but I'm not that immature. I can talk about day-to-day adult stuff. But when it's all they ever talk about, going on and on about the driest stuff imaginable...yikes. Obviously, I'm one of the common denominators in all of those conversations, and I suspect that they're telling me about boring stuff because they don't view me "that way", and don't care about flirting with me or making me think they're exciting. I've never had this problem with women that are into me. (Not this much, anyway. I don't value intellectual conversation as much as ND40, but there have been a few women that were into me, but sort of...bland outside of that.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted June 21, 2015 Share Posted June 21, 2015 Interesting dream BS. Here is a guess in dream analysis - but of course only you can accurately interpret the dream. James Bond script - that is about the adventures of Blue Spiral. The songs about journeys which you want to see on YouTube represent life choices - life's paths which you are considering. Being interrupted by the need to have a shower - distraction from focusing on focusing on a life path - possibly because of sex, sexual attraction, or totally different - could be guilt or something to want yo "wash from your life". What do you think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 21, 2015 Author Share Posted June 21, 2015 Interesting dream BS. Here is a guess in dream analysis - but of course only you can accurately interpret the dream. James Bond script - that is about the adventures of Blue Spiral. The songs about journeys which you want to see on YouTube represent life choices - life's paths which you are considering. Being interrupted by the need to have a shower - distraction from focusing on focusing on a life path - possibly because of sex, sexual attraction, or totally different - could be guilt or something to want yo "wash from your life". What do you think? Very interesting, thanks. I personally think that the shower represented mundane, everyday crap that gets in the way of what I really want to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 21, 2015 Author Share Posted June 21, 2015 Well, I was having a very peaceful, solitary weekend...and then I had to come on ENA and talk to people. Ugh. I don't regret it, though--certain things shouldn't go unsaid. I think I'll take a video game break to recharge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 22, 2015 Author Share Posted June 22, 2015 I feel better now! I had a chance to initiate contact with BETTY...and did not. I'm proud of myself. And now for what will be a very rare feature: Blue Spiral's fashion corner. The heat has finally forced me to wear shorts. In the summer, I wear shorts and a short-sleeved t-shirt; in the fall, I wear jeans and either a short-sleeved or a long-sleeved t-shirt; in the winter, I wear jeans and a long-sleeved t-shirt; in the spring, I wear jeans and either a long-sleeved or short-sleeved t-shirt. I wear whichever jeans are on top, and it takes me approximately five seconds to pick a shirt. A FWB once told me that I should "dress to impress", but the concept was/is completely alien to me. I literally forget that men do things to impress women. I mean, I remember after a while, but... In continuing with my alphabet of women, I now have candidates for D and E...but it's late, and I'm lazy, so I'll do it tomorrow. Maybe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 What games do you like? What consoles do you have? I let my ex have the ps3 and I feel like that was a horrible mistake. I think I may need to buy my own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 ooh, blue spiral's fashion corner! I hope this becomes a regular feature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 What games do you like? What consoles do you have? It's sort of embarrassing to admit this, but, I haven't played a new video game since about 1999 or so. The newest game I played was Super Mario 64, and that was for like five or ten minutes. I still play my old SNES games, because, if I got into new video games, I'd never get anything done. I imagine I'll eventually get a new console of some sort, though. I was strongly tempted by Super Mario Galaxy and those new Batman games... ooh, blue spiral's fashion corner! I hope this becomes a regular feature. I'm not against that, but, it'd be extremely basic and repetitive. Much in the same way that I play old video games, I keep my clothes for a long time. I only recently threw out a pair of jeans I'd had since high school--they still fit, and I only used them every few years, for physical-work-type stuff (cleaning out my grandmother's garage, etc.), but they were really falling apart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 If you do get a new console, I suggest a ps3. Awesome library and you can snag a great bundle for now for really cheap. You should even continue to get new games added to the already vast library until at least 2016, I hear. Can't promise that it won't make you less productive, haha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 If you do get a new console, I suggest a ps3. Awesome library and you can snag a great bundle for now for really cheap. You should even continue to get new games added to the already vast library until at least 2016, I hear. Do you have to hook it up to a network for it to work? I'm a grumpy old man--I don't want to have to sign up for stuff. In other news, my best friend totally thinks I should steal my first girlfriend away from her husband. I told him that, while I theoretically have no problem with that, I'm not a fan of her current mental/physical condition. He thinks I can magically "change her back", but I told him that she has to do it herself. (The three of us--myself, her, and my best friend--were sort of a trio when we were younger.) Ideally, she'd change and leave him for me...but I seriously doubt that will ever happen (both the changing and the leaving). Even worse, I already had the perfect opportunity to do this, some years ago, and I idiotically passed on it. If I'd known then what I know now... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 No, you don't. In fact with ps3, you don't need a ps+ membership to play games online. Of course, you don't have to play online (so you don't need a connection at all) but if you want to play online, it connects via wifi or ethernet and you're good to go without any added cost. I do think the ps+ membership is worth it though. It's $50/year and every month, you get to download new games for free. And they aren't all crap either. When I had it in 2013/2014, I got BioShock Infinite for free. Ps4 is a different story. But PS3, you don't need ps+. This is one of the reasons why I think PS > Xbox because on the Xbox, you need a membership to do ANYTHING. And I mean ANYTHING. There are a lot of nerd guys in my area and I see a lot of cheap used ps3s on CL and oh my, it's just so tempting, I want to have one again so badly. I think if your first girlfriend wants to make a change, she will do it herself and divorce him. You shouldn't have to "steal" anyone or have to convince someone to be with you. I'd rather someone be with me because they want to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 Interesting. I'll have to keep that in mind. I agree--and, obviously, I'm using "steal" in the colloquial way. Unlike some men, I realize that women aren't property. The thing is, my friend wants both my ex and myself to be happy, and he thinks we'd be better off together. He doesn't like how she's changed since she's married him, or how her husband has treated her. (And before anyone says "But how do you guys know what's really going on??", well, she's told us. Though she doesn't tell us as much anymore, for reasons I won't go into at this point.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 Well of course I know you realize that. I always put "steal" into quotes when I talk about people. It's hard to say whether your friend is right or not. What do you think about the situation? It sounds like she has changed for the worse since marriage but how can one predict that she would just "snap back" if she were divorce and go back to her old life? She probably wouldn't, at least, not right away, and she may be permanently changed. I can say for myself, I changed when I was in a relationship with my ex N and not in a good way. I did not revert totally to my old self after coming out of that relationship. In many ways, I have the old me back but I have changed some as a result. Twice bitten, once shy, and I think I am more closed off. I think many people are like that. You don't know what she would be like post divorce and I bet she doesn't really know either. Girls are hard...get a ps3! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 It's hard to say whether your friend is right or not. What do you think about the situation? The super-abridged version is that I think she's doing what she really wants to do, and she views any harmful side-effects as unrelated, temporary things. She thinks that she has to do this, that, and the other thing to be a happy/moral person, and it isn't working, and it hasn't worked for a decade or more, but she still believes it. This will sound convoluted, but, I want to believe that who she was when I was with her is who she really is, and that this is just a phase...but I think it's actually the opposite. I think she went through a phase when she was younger, and this is who she really is--and even who she was back then, but it was hidden underneath and/or not as pronounced. And it isn't a bad thing, it's just unhealthy and unnecessary, IMHO. Granted, I am far from neutral when it comes to this particular situation. And I'm sure she'd say the same thing about me: that I've changed, that she hopes my current attitude is just a phase, etc. But I haven't really changed all that much. We were both too different, we just didn't realize it at the time. Also, as much as it pains me to admit it, this whole thing is partially my fault. She and I had a very symbiotic/co-dependent relationship--and I'm sure that we still would, to some degree, if I hadn't greatly minimized contact--and, even after she was married, there was a time when she relied on me for the emotional support that her husband just couldn't give her. So, in that sense, I "saved her" from having to deal with the full weight of her (in my opinion) mistakes, and thus made her situation seem more manageable. Maybe if I'd stayed out of it, she would have realized the truth and changed her life. Or, maybe something bad would have happened, instead. I didn't want to take the risk. (And please don't think I did it for purely heroic/noble reasons, I was getting something out of it, as well.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 I hope you don't get your head messed up by the contact with her BS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 I hope you don't get your head messed up by the contact with her BS. Thank you. I think I'm safe, now...I was extremely attracted to her for a long period of time (and, indeed, in love with her), but, after the changes she's gone through, that's no longer the case. I think, anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 When one is trying to focus on something other than women, summer is the worst possible time. Whenever I go out in public, I see women running around in next to nothing, and I'm constantly reminded of what I'm missing out on. It's agony. I'm constantly tempted to re-activate one of my old profiles and go looking for new FWBs...but then I remember how much frustration was involved in that, and how minimal my chances would be. Oh, I'm sure I could find some FWBs, but, they wouldn't be nearly as hot as the women I'm referring to here. These are the times when I wish that I'd been more materialistic. Maybe if I'd cared more about money, I'd have found a way to get some, and I'd thus have a better chance with women like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 well, nothing worthwhile in life is really easy. It is so freaking hot. i'm wearing just about nothing at work, and enjoying spending time in the cold room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 well, nothing worthwhile in life is really easy. I'm sorry, but, that's a complete cop-out. Lots of people have easy lives, or at least luck out in certain areas. And--as much as I hate to drag gender into this yet again--if you flipped the genders, I would have zero problems in this area. Any remotely-okay woman can walk up to any above-average (in a normal way, not in an unattainable way) man and have no problem getting sex. Actually, no, this applies to the unattainable people, too. Look at the women that Tiger Woods had affairs with; they were hardly supermodels. What do you think my chances are with Kate Upton? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted June 24, 2015 Share Posted June 24, 2015 Isn't Kate Upton a brilliant horsewoman (as well as a supermodel). in fact, I think she is achieved at quite a lot of things. I'm sure also that I read she freaked out when she realised lots of old guys were wanking themselves off with her photos. She was very young an naeive when she started the whole modelling thing which I think has objectified her - there's a lot more to that young woman than her looks (meant in a nice way) - but I don't think that would interest you BS - and she has bad skin days too like a lot of women her age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted June 24, 2015 Share Posted June 24, 2015 I think it's kind of funny that she got upset over the guys using her photos like that. She's a model; what did she expect? Oh the naivety... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 24, 2015 Author Share Posted June 24, 2015 I'm sure also that I read she freaked out when she realised lots of old guys were wanking themselves off with her photos. I'm...I'm not old! No, I've never used pictures or any sort of visual stimulation for that. This link is relevant and SFW, however: link removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 24, 2015 Author Share Posted June 24, 2015 I think it's kind of funny that she got upset over the guys using her photos like that. She's a model; what did she expect? Oh the naivety... If they're pictures intended for release, she shouldn't be surprised, no. Those other pictures, on the other hand... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted June 24, 2015 Share Posted June 24, 2015 If they're pictures intended for release, she shouldn't be surprised, no. Those other pictures, on the other hand... Maybe I'm going to sound mean here but I think if you can't possibly stomach the idea of your photos being made public for public consumption, then it's a bad idea to share them with anyone. Which is why I don't take pics of that nature, because I can't stomach the thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Spiral Posted June 24, 2015 Author Share Posted June 24, 2015 Maybe I'm going to sound mean here but I think if you can't possibly stomach the idea of your photos being made public for public consumption, then it's a bad idea to share them with anyone. Which is why I don't take pics of that nature, because I can't stomach the thought. In her defense, I don't think she shared them--the cloud wasn't as secure as it should have been. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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