Blue Spiral's Adventures in Solitude

[Blue Spiral]

On the cam model plan. Does it have to be so much? Or even so much at once. If you don't like to be noticed maybe you should send a couple of smaller payments.

 

I've almost never had extremely hot women notice me, so, I'd like to find out what that's like. Y'know, before I die. Also, a lot of little gifts might give them the impression that this is going to be a regular thing, as opposed to a one-time thing. I don't want to get their hopes up. (Am I extremely considerate of all women's feelings, including cam models? Yes. Yes, I am.)

 

You could make it look like they came from different people as well, if you're worried about pimps.

 

I'm not. I'm sure their software could see right through that, anyway.

[Batya33]

They would not be noticing you. They would be noticing your wallet and potential wallet if anything. You also cannot be sure that they are women.

[Blue Spiral]

They would not be noticing you. They would be noticing your wallet and potential wallet if anything.

 

Semantics. Look, yeah, I'm Mr. "Women Are Too Concerned About How Much Money a Man Makes", but that's just female provisioning, and it's a fact of life. Let's face it: men are expected to impress women, not vice-versa. And how do they usually do it? Status, which is frequently tied to money. I think it's pretty clear that I'm never going to impress an extremely hot woman with my charming personality, or my height, or my success. If I want to experience something that most men get to experience at some point in their lives, I am going to have to splurge a bit, sadly. I'd sort of like to do it before I die.

 

Also, though I'd enjoy the attention, this is still more about them than me. It's a thank you.

 

You also cannot be sure that they are women.

 

We've been over this, Batya. It's video chatting, they're taking their clothes off, and it isn't pre-recorded. I've seen enough to be able to tell. Plus, a friend of mine used to be on the site.

 

In other news: so much for my female-free week. That FWB candidate sent me more pics, apparently.

[annie24]

Semantics. Look, yeah, I'm Mr. "Women Are Too Concerned About How Much Money a Man Makes", but that's just female provisioning, and it's a fact of life. Let's face it: men are expected to impress women, not vice-versa. And how do they usually do it? Status, which is frequently tied to money. I think it's pretty clear that I'm never going to impress an extremely hot woman with my charming personality, or my height, or my success. If I want to experience something that most men get to experience at some point in their lives, I am going to have to splurge a bit, sadly. I'd sort of like to do it before I die.

 

Also, though I'd enjoy the attention, this is still more about them than me. It's a thank you.

 

I am having a hard time wrapping my head around this. (Of course, it's your decision, so I don't have to understand). It's just that, if you have extra $ at the end of the year, why not make a charitable donation to a cause you support? I understand that you like and support the cam girl, just know that it won't be tax deductible, and you won't have any tangible benefits (other than feeling good about yourself?). I can see why you'd want to impress an extremely hot woman, but wouldn't it be more worthwhile to do that in person? I guess I don't know what you get out of it, giving it as an online gift, rather than say, meeting her at an expensive restaurant the way other guys might. Just last night, I was at a restaurant, eating dinner at the bar. Next to me were 2 hot women, with men old enough to be their dads. I have no idea what was going on, but I mean, at least these guys had arm candy and seemed to be having a fun night with these women.

[Blue Spiral]

I am having a hard time wrapping my head around this. (Of course, it's your decision, so I don't have to understand). It's just that, if you have extra $ at the end of the year, why not make a charitable donation to a cause you support?

 

Women taking their clothes off is a cause I support! If you want to encourage behavior, you reward it, so...!

 

Seriously, annie. I know that you aren't an alien that's never met a man, before. You have to know that the sex part of our brain isn't related to the altruism part of our brain. "Well, I can't get laid, so I guess I'll give my dating money to the March of Dimes instead." Okay.............?

 

I understand that you like and support the cam girl, just know that it won't be tax deductible, and you won't have any tangible benefits (other than feeling good about yourself?). I can see why you'd want to impress an extremely hot woman, but wouldn't it be more worthwhile to do that in person?

 

I'm too chicken, and I can feel good about myself from right here, thank you. I'm also celibate, which sort of rules out the whole "tangible benefits" thing.

 

I guess I don't know what you get out of it, giving it as an online gift, rather than say, meeting her at an expensive restaurant the way other guys might. Just last night, I was at a restaurant, eating dinner at the bar. Next to me were 2 hot women, with men old enough to be their dads. I have no idea what was going on, but I mean, at least these guys had arm candy and seemed to be having a fun night with these women.

 

I don't have enough money for a trophy gf/trophy wife. If I did, ENA would never have had to put up with me, because I wouldn't have anything to complain about.

 

I think I know what's confusing all of you. Most guys in my situation would do one of two things: spend money on expensive dates, impress women that way, and then get ditch them after getting laid; or, they'd just hire prostitutes. Well, I don't like dating (or leading on women) and I'm not a criminal (outside of jaywalking from time to time), so my options are a bit more limited. These cam models are literally the only non-depressing human interaction I have, and I don't even talk to them!

[annie24]

yeah, but at least with a donation to the march of dimes, you will get a tote bag and a receipt for your 2014 taxes. I mean, spend your money in the way that makes you the happiest. We can't judge. Some people like to buy Rolex watches, when a watch that costs $20 tells time just as well. Whatever makes them happy, right? If spending $100 on a cam girl makes you $100 happier, then do it. The question is - is that going to be the best use of your $100 (by your own standards, not ours).

[Batya33]

We can agree to disagree -it doesn't matter if their clothes are off or what "friends" know and of course they might use the money to shoot heroin up their veins or worse -is that what you want to support?

 

Obviously there are many alternative ways to spend your money to feel happier -or to save/invest it -whatever floats your boat.

 

Since these people (whatever gender) are strangers you have no idea if they will be impressed with your gift and certainly they will not be impressed with you - because they don't know you -for all they know you have a trust fund and $100 to you is like $1 to someone else.

[Blue Spiral]

yeah, but at least with a donation to the march of dimes, you will get a tote bag

 

I'm...I'm straight, remember?

 

We can agree to disagree -it doesn't matter if their clothes are off or what "friends" know and of course they might use the money to shoot heroin up their veins or worse -is that what you want to support?

 

So...what you're saying is that I should never go to the mall again, because god only knows how those employees spend their money?

 

Since these people (whatever gender) are strangers you have no idea if they will be impressed with your gift and certainly they will not be impressed with you - because they don't know you -for all they know you have a trust fund and $100 to you is like $1 to someone else.

 

I'm long past the point of believing that a woman could ever be impressed with me. The models do get excited about gifts, though, even if they aren't huge. (I'm sorry; there's no way to make that sentence sound less phallic.) However: you're wise to prey on my insecurity. Maybe they won't be impressed with my gift. Ugh.

 

I just want...hmm. It's late, and I'm too tired to type all this out, now. I'll take a shot at it tomorrow.

[Silverbirch]

Maybe you live in the wrong country or at least the wrong state. Where I live, prostitution has been legal a very long time. I don't consider the girls (or boys) as criminals just for that, but yeah, some of the people who manage it are involved in all types of crime. Surely though, there would have to be some prostitutes local to you who meet your criteria in hotness.

[Batya33]

I'm...I'm straight, remember?

 

 

 

So...what you're saying is that I should never go to the mall again, because god only knows how those employees spend their money?

 

 

 

I'm long past the point of believing that a woman could ever be impressed with me. The models do get excited about gifts, though, even if they aren't huge. (I'm sorry; there's no way to make that sentence sound less phallic.) However: you're wise to prey on my insecurity. Maybe they won't be impressed with my gift. Ugh.

 

I just want...hmm. It's late, and I'm too tired to type all this out, now. I'll take a shot at it tomorrow.

 

LOL - I think you can do better than these types of exaggerations/accusations. Obviously it's your money -I think your expectations about how it will be received and who actually is receiving it is unrealistic and nothing to do with whether you have insecurities or otherwise.

[Blue Spiral]

Maybe you live in the wrong country or at least the wrong state. Where I live, prostitution has been legal a very long time. I don't consider the girls (or boys) as criminals just for that, but yeah, some of the people who manage it are involved in all types of crime. Surely though, there would have to be some prostitutes local to you who meet your criteria in hotness.

 

I'm not moving, and prostitution is illegal, here.

 

What I really want is something that I never got enough of--a woman's best. As in, "a chance to be with a woman, for a significant period of time, during her hottest years". My teenage/twentysomething years weren't as fun as most people's.

 

Obviously, I realize that I'm not going to get that, anymore. I'm no longer in that age-bracket, and I don't have the money necessary for a trophy gf. But I can still interact with women that are at their best. (And before someone says, "omg, you think sleazy cam models are 'the best'??", please remember that I don't think that anyone is sleazy, and that I'm strictly talking about the physical, anyway.)

 

When it was theoretically possible that I could get women at their best, I was willing to put in a teensy bit of effort. Now that it isn't, well...

[annie24]

It's kind of sad and depressing to me that you have a binary view of women and what makes them worthwhile (i.e., hot or not). There's so much more to life and women than looks, and there is so much more we have to offer. Highly accomplished men come to me all the time, asking me for assistance with their projects, because of my particular area of expertise. I'm not the hottest woman out there by any means, but then again, hiring a hot woman without the skill set they want isn't going to get them very far. Anyway, when you have these "female free days" it's sad to me because you aren't really getting the most out of life. imho.

[Firiel]

I may be wrong, but it seems like you view most/all human interactions as transactions, where a woman's only currency is sex and a man's is... I'm not sure. Money? Power? Then you extrapolate that because you, as a man, interact with the world that way, all men must interact with the world that way. In fact, I would venture to say that seeing every interaction primarily and explicitly as an economic transfer of goods and services is not the most common way to interact with the world.

 

Do unattractive women frustrate you as much as attractive women? I know you don't really like people at all, male or female, but you have a lot less frustration overall with men. I would assume that's because men don't have anything you want (sex). If that's the case, it would only make sense if you didn't mind interacting with unattractive women on the same basic level on which you don't mind interacting with men (co-worker, bank teller, etc.). Because they don't have anything you want (sex). Is that the way it shakes out? Do you generally have no issue interacting with women that you find unattractive? If you dislike interacting with unattractive women (more than you dislike interacting with men), why is that?

[Blue Spiral]

It's kind of sad and depressing to me that you have a binary view of women and what makes them worthwhile (i.e., hot or not).

 

Someone's attractiveness has nothing to do with their intrinsic worth as a human being. That just happens to be the only part I'm interested in. Now, without a doubt, there are a lot of men who think that a woman's worth is solely based on her attractiveness. Please remember that there are multiple factions of us men, over here: one anti-marriage guy may want to drag women back to the 1950s, while another is a radical modernist that wants to destroy various relationship traditions.

 

There's so much more to life and women than looks, and there is so much more we have to offer.

 

My version of that would be "There's so much more to life than women, but, when it does come to women, looks are the only thing I'm interested in.

[Blue Spiral]

I may be wrong, but it seems like you view most/all human interactions as transactions, where a woman's only currency is sex and a man's is... I'm not sure. Money? Power?

 

Status.

 

Then you extrapolate that because you, as a man, interact with the world that way, all men must interact with the world that way.

 

We (unfortunately) live in a status-based society, and we're (unfortunately) a hierarchy-based species, so, yes, I believe that most people interact with the world on those terms, even if the vast majority of them are doing it subconsciously.

 

In fact, I would venture to say that seeing every interaction primarily and explicitly as an economic transfer of goods and services is not the most common way to interact with the world.

 

I think that just describing it as "economic" is too simple. Money is obviously part of it, but not the whole thing.

 

Do unattractive women frustrate you as much as attractive women? I know you don't really like people at all, male or female, but you have a lot less frustration overall with men. I would assume that's because men don't have anything you want (sex). If that's the case, it would only make sense if you didn't mind interacting with unattractive women on the same basic level on which you don't mind interacting with men (co-worker, bank teller, etc.). Because they don't have anything you want (sex). Is that the way it shakes out? Do you generally have no issue interacting with women that you find unattractive? If you dislike interacting with unattractive women (more than you dislike interacting with men), why is that?

 

I don't have much to do with unattractive women. They're like men...I don't really notice them at all.

 

Thank you for bringing up the transaction issue, though: I have something I've been meaning to say about that. Unfortunately, it will have to wait until later tonight.

[annie24]

Someone's attractiveness has nothing to do with their intrinsic worth as a human being. That just happens to be the only part I'm interested in. Now, without a doubt, there are a lot of men who think that a woman's worth is solely based on her attractiveness. Please remember that there are multiple factions of us men, over here: one anti-marriage guy may want to drag women back to the 1950s, while another is a radical modernist that wants to destroy various relationship traditions.

 

 

 

My version of that would be "There's so much more to life than women, but, when it does come to women, looks are the only thing I'm interested in.

 

Why are you not interested in women beyond their looks? I kind of don't get that. I can't possibly have a "Man-free Monday" or whatnot. That would last all of 5 minutes, seeing as how I work in science. I kind of just don't understand how that goes - trying to avoid 50% of the population on a given day. I'm curious what you do for a living. In a collaborative environment like mine, I have to deal with all sorts of people every day. Do you not value men either? I just don't get it.

[Firiel]

Yes, by "economic," I didn't mean simply financial. Rather, I meant the broader idea of "trading" various goods and services, whether they be physical or non-physical.

 

Unfortunately, I do believe that a lot of our society operates under a transactional standard, though I would see that as a negative element of our (in my case, American) culture. I do not agree that the terms are as you have set, where men value only (or primarily) sex while women value only (or primarily) status. That removes the potential for friendship (for straight men) and familial relationships (for both sexes-- most siblings do not want to have sex with each other and would not disown each other based on a "low" status).

[Blue Spiral]

Why are you not interested in women beyond their looks?

 

I've never been all that interested in people. If not for these infuriating sexual urges...!

 

Do you not value men either?

 

I value them even less than women.

 

And, Firiel, I'll be addressing the transactional issue either tomorrow or Friday. I'd do it tonight, but I'm behind on sleep, so I'm wimping out and going to bed early.

[ApocalypseDreams]

BS - are you a MGTOW?

[Patrick974]

I've never been all that interested in people. If not for these infuriating sexual urges...!

 

 

 

I value them even less than women.

 

And, Firiel, I'll be addressing the transactional issue either tomorrow or Friday. I'd do it tonight, but I'm behind on sleep, so I'm wimping out and going to bed early.

 

Avoiding people on off-work days I can understand, but without asking too much about your profession, I assume you have a job and can't avoid them from monday to friday ?

[Blue Spiral]

BS - are you a MGTOW?

 

That's a loaded term, but I'll tentatively say yes. When I was younger, I made a decision to never get married or have kids...which, at its core, seems to be what MGTOW is all about. I suspect that most MGTOWs wouldn't consider me one of them, though, because I don't subscribe to certain cultural beliefs.

 

Avoiding people on off-work days I can understand, but without asking too much about your profession, I assume you have a job and can't avoid them from monday to friday ?

 

I telecommute, for the most part.

[Blue Spiral]

Well, my female-free week ended in a bizarre way.

 

I recently created a new e-mail account on a public site. Then, just a little while later, this woman starts e-mailing me. "omg, I just saw you log in! Where have you been??" She seemed convinced that I was someone else, and she didn't believe me when I said that I wasn't him. It turns out that this guy didn't use his e-mail address for a year or something, so it was "recycled", and put on the list of possible addresses for me to choose from. Of course I picked the address with a quasi-stalker attached to it. Ugh, my luck. I think I've convinced her that I'm not him, though.

 

I think that I must be living in some sort of darkly comedic TV show...

[Batya33]

Oh well. Next time maybe don't choose Ipromisenot2stalku.

 

That is actually very funny!!!

[Blue Spiral]

Blue Spiral update: I have no updates. I've been doing what I enjoy, taking it easy, and generally keeping to myself. I've managed to avoid drama, the last few days.

 

It's almost 2015. I've actually accomplished quite a bit, this year...despite the fact that a lot of crap got in the way. I've also managed to maintain my ideal weight. I need to work on getting more sleep, though...

[Fudgie]

Wishing you a female-free holiday!

 

As for the sleeping bit, I've been having issues with sleeping too. My work shifts got screwed with and now I'm working alternative shifts. I started a new sleep medicine. It's an antidepressant but it makes you super tired. I don't take it every night but it helps. Weird dreams though.