Personal Narrative Poem (long)

[From_Now_On]

Craziness Runs Out

Love Would Last Forever

 

It'd been so long

I'd seen so much

I could not remember

A gentle touch

 

But your eyes on mine

It felt so right

And your hand in mine

So soft, so tight

 

My head was screaming

'it's all just too fast'

My mind was insisting

'this can never last'

 

When you told me you loved me

I just looked away

You waited for the words

That I just couldn't say

 

It wasn't that I didn't care

Nor that I didn't want to believe

It's that I knew the truly good things

Have this tendency to leave

 

And I wanted you to hold me

When I moved out of your grasp

And I wanted to hold you're hand tighter

Even when so loosely I did clasp

 

I know that I hurt you

With my nonchalant tough act

I know that my neglect

Was lacking of any tact

 

But I didn't know how to go about this

I didn't know where to begin

How to hold back just enough

To not get hurt but let you in

 

You pursued me for awhile

Perhaps from sympathy or pity

Maybe it was just because

You thought me some sort of pretty

 

I do not really know

It doesn't really matter why

I suppose I could figure it out

If I'd take the time to try

 

The point is that although I never said it

In the way you needed to hear

I really did care for you

There was just so much to fear

 

I thought to let you go myself

Until I saw the tears in your eyes

That's when I buried away my doubts

And put my luck on post-second tries

 

Then in the little things I noticed

I felt you pull away

I didn't know what to do

I didn't know what to say

 

Everything inside me

Sang 'I told you so'

Still something said to let you be the one

Who choose to let me go

 

You did and said 'I'm sorry'

'I know things have been rough'

'I hate to tell you this now'

'While you're struggling with so much *stuff*'

 

The thing is I understand

And I'm sorry you saw me cry

I held it in and played strong

But you caught me as I walked by

 

It wasn't that you broke this off

I'm too old for silly dreams

I'm over childish heartbreaks

And taking everything as it seems

 

I guess what really got me

Is that you said we would be friends

But both of us are broken hearted

In the way that only time mends

 

I'm leaving soon to somewhere far from here

And time's a luxury I lack

I need you to know

That I won't be looking back

 

There's too much pain in the past

The present hasn't been so great

I need to live my life

Before it's just too late

 

You said that maybe later

We could try all this again

But I try to learn from my mistakes

And not tread back on where I've been

 

As friends we could have made it

As friends this could have last

But there's no use on looking back

Because we can not change the past

 

There's a lesson to be learned here

Betwixt the guilt and the good-byes

Even we can fool ourselves

If we live to love these lies

[unexpectedvictim57]

omg! i love this poem so much........ it describes me so much in the beginning, but since im still in the relationship, i can't say that we are both broken harted and im leaving and stuff........ but he's so hurt because i just can't say i love you....... even though i care so much i m afraid of caring for him because good things tend to stop...... just like you said.....

[From_Now_On]

unexpectedvictim57:

Yeah...actually...the title is kind of an ode to the whole "love" dilema we had in our relationship. I would not say I "loved" him...but he insisted he "loved" me...and I really truly did/do care about him...but things were just going so fast and I didn't trust myself to be able to honestly define it as "love". So instead we just compromised to laugh and call our fondness for eachother "craziness". We'd ask eachother if craziness ever runs out. Both of us truly hoped it didn't...but it does and did. Soon his "love" for me faded...and I was at least relieved that I had not told him I 'loved' him...because that would have meant I had given him my heart...I'd be entirely broken. I knew it was all craziness...even though I had hoped it was really something more. Just be careful and know you are right not to say you 'love' him...even if you truly care a lot about him. Only say it when you're sure. Chances are you care about him just as much as he does for you...you just hold the value of the word to be a lot more.

 

Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed the poem, and thanks for your comment.

[ang3l2004]

You are a very talented poet,Keep writing I will be looking out for your poems as you post them,Great job!!!

[Delaurence23]

It is a beautiful poem

i love the way you rhyme

and it doenst sound cheesy like a lot of other poems

it is great in every way

the way you persuade us all to see your situation is amzing

keep writing

you are very talented

[From_Now_On]

ang3l2004 and Delaurence23:

 

I'm glad you enjoyed it. The postive feedback is what inspires me to keep on posting here...I like to know that someone can enjoy 'em...so thank you muchly for your comments. =)

[unexpectedvictim57]

ya i don't want to say i love him, cause im 14 and i know i don't....... but he keeps saying it...... and im afraid that he'll keep saying it and will get mad at me or dumpme because i won't say it and he would never understand why i can't! even if i did try to explain to him why........ its so confusing........ what did you tell your bf when he told you he loved you and ou wouldn't say it back? advice maybe? remember im 14, not 19.....

[From_Now_On]

unexpectedvictim57:

 

hey hun, yeah I'd absolutely be willing to give you some advice and explain my situation and what I did and the like. Feel free to PM me if you'd like my MSN IM, Yahoo IM, or email...although I think they are already listed.

 

Hope to hear from you.