Larkin Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 No, not yet but soon...unless I change my mind...I can't believe someone can be so stupid. You, and your swollen eye; him, being late...and stupid... Down the road, when you're celebrating your anniversary, you'll look back at this and laugh... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 16, 2015 Author Share Posted January 16, 2015 You, and your swollen eye; him, being late...and stupid... Down the road, when you're celebrating your anniversary, you'll look back at this and laugh... LMAO..thank you, that really made me laugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 I hope after all this you enjoy meeting him! I do tell people these days that I do not get emails on my phone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 16, 2015 Author Share Posted January 16, 2015 The date with Pedro was...interesting. He looked exactly like his pics but was much better than I expected. Very open or so he seemed..conversation really flowed. He told me about his last relationship (3 years ago) and that he hasn't slept with anyone since then (I asked him). Also about his family, job, colleagues, friends etc. I liked his way of talking...sweet, quiet and like he didn't have anything to hide. I opened up as well..he was easy to talk to. Then....after about an hour, he..let's say...stopped being shy...lol. He told me he was very attracted to me, that he didn't expect it or even hope for it, that he came over here expecting a nice evening, that he was sure we would do well communication-wise and that he was shocked he felt so attracted. He kept holding my hand, caressing my cheek and all that. I was keeping my distance at first (both because it was just a first date but also because it's just how I am) but, eventually, I relaxed and let him hold my hand. He tried to kiss me...oh, about 10 times..lol..but he wasn't aggressive..he just looked deep into my eyes, kissed my cheek and tried to go for the lips...and, well, after 2 hours (the date lasted for 3) I kissed him...but no tongue He was too enthusiastic...I don't know if he meant what he said but he kept complimenting me (in a sweet way) and asked me if I liked him. I told him the truth..that I did like him but it's too soon and I want to get to know him better. He said he wants the same. However, when I asked what he's doing tomorrow he said he's going to catch up with friends, etc...he'll call me in the morning though. Overall he said a lot...that he thinks distance can be overcome, that he'll definitely come back soon to see me again (he said he'll be here for my b/day week..end of January..and maybe next weekend, too, but nothing definite). I don't know what to make of this all..I'll take it one day at a time...but I did have a good time PS He said I'm the first person he meets from that site and his first attempt at online dating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 It all sounds good - sounds like he wasn't that aggressive and he sure was open about his feelings! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 16, 2015 Author Share Posted January 16, 2015 He was more open than most guys I've gone out with through online dating..but then again I don't usually talk so much before the first date as I did with him..we did talk every day for 10 days. Anyway, I'm glad I got that excursion planned for Sunday...it will help me not focus on him so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 16, 2015 Author Share Posted January 16, 2015 Oh, by the way, in person he's a spitting image of Jake Gyllenhaal, the guy from Brokeback Mountain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthDallas40 Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Obviously it's too soon to tell PEDRO's real intentions - and I doubt he truly knows them himself at this point - but it's great to read that you FINALLY went on a really good date. High-five! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 woohoo!! promising!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Oh jake. He's hot. Woohoo hope you two meet up tomorrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 17, 2015 Author Share Posted January 17, 2015 hope you two meet up tomorrow We won't as he never asked me to...and that brings me to the 'negatives' of the meeting...which I didn't mention last night as I was still 'under the influence'..lol 1. This could be a possible dealbreaker for me...he's either stingy or very careful with his money. When I asked him why didn't he take his car and chose to come by bus he said gas is expensive (which it is but we're only talking 3 hours round trip and he told me he rarely uses the car in that town as everything is in walking distance). Then, that led to a discussion about money and him complaining life is expensive and that he doesn't earn much (our salaries are almost the same...not much but not that little, in my opinion)...which then led to me offering to pay the bill at the end of the night..and he said 'ok'. No thank you, I'll pay next time, nothing. It was just 9 euros (10 USD) and I didn't mind paying as I had a cup of coffee and a glass of wine and he had only had coffee and he did make the trip to see me, after all...BUT I didn't like that 'ok'. Then, I started thinking that he's 46, he's never been married, no kids, doesn't support his parents or anything (his father has a good pension and they live with his sister who also has a good salary) and he's been working for 20 years...and all he has to show for it is a car he rarely uses. I, on the other hand, although not rich, I have my own flat and I can afford to go on holidays a couple times a year, go out for drinks or eat at a nice restaurant a couple times a week, for example..oh, and I smoke, too (which is an expensive habit these days...lol)..he doesn't. I don't want someone who is rich or can spoil me but I don't want someone who counts every penny either. So, this is something that makes me sceptical. 2. When I asked him (again) if he's leaving today (Saturday) or tomorrow, again, he said he didn't know...which I find strange, at the very least...especially since he seemed so enthusiastic about me. 3. I didn't expect him to ask me to meet tonight as I had already told him I had plans but he could have easily asked me to meet this morning...I told him I'l be at home. Instead, when I asked what he's doing tomorrow (today) he said he'll see his friends, his parents, etc..and nothing about Sunday...which makes sense as he didn't know how long he'll stay! 4. I told him that on Sunday I'll be near his town (the excursion I'm taking is, coincidentally, less than an hour from where he lives)...I didn't give details (that it's organised by a singles site etc), I just said I'll be with a group from a travel agency, not with friends. I expected him to say something like we could meet for a coffee or something..but he didn't. So, because of all of the above, I'm not getting my hopes up about him just yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 17, 2015 Author Share Posted January 17, 2015 UPDATE: Well, I think he was just full of it. He called me, as he had said. At 1pm. He said he was on his way to meet some friends. No mention about seeing me again or about anything from last night, just a nice chat for about 15 minutes until I said 'well, it was nice talking to you...have fun with your friends' and he said 'have a pleasant afternoon'. I talked to a friend about the whole situation and she said that he probably wanted to have sex last night and his interest in me is much less than he showed..and I think I agree...I can't imagine that someone who likes me as much as he said and who knows we can't meet tomorrow, he wouldn't have asked me to meet today..he knew that I was free all day until late in the evening...and it's not like he was busy either. I asked him what he did this morning and he said just hanging around his house. Anyway, it's up to him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 The only outlying comment I have is that maybe when you ended the conversation without referencing getting together he figured you'd changed your mind about seeing him. I only say that because why did he call you other than to try to see you again -he could have not called or called when he returned home so that he could have the excuse not being close to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 17, 2015 Author Share Posted January 17, 2015 The only outlying comment I have is that maybe when you ended the conversation without referencing getting together he figured you'd changed your mind about seeing him. I only say that because why did he call you other than to try to see you again -he could have not called or called when he returned home so that he could have the excuse not being close to you. Well, we were talking for 15 minutes about general things and he didn't mention seeing me again. I don't see why I should have been the one to ask...especially since he was the one last night who kept saying 'I don't know' when I asked him what he would do today or tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Well, we were talking for 15 minutes about general things and he didn't mention seeing me again. I don't see why I should have been the one to ask...especially since he was the one last night who kept saying 'I don't know' when I asked him what he would do today or tomorrow. I just meant that the way you ended the conversation did not show interest in seeing him again. And, I also see your point! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 17, 2015 Author Share Posted January 17, 2015 He knew I liked him, he had asked me last night and I had said yes and I want to get to know you better and I had also asked what he's doing today...not to mention the kiss. I couldn't have done/said anything more. For his own reasons, he just didn't want to/couldn't see me today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happpybear Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Ok, I'm late to the party and haven't read your whole journal, but I read your description of the date with the Jake Gyllenhal look-alike, and I also got the impression that he was after sex. He was really touchy and overly sweet and sappy like...and coming on really strong for someone he doesn't really know. Maybe that's just his temperament, but I dunno. It will be interesting to see if he does set-up another date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 17, 2015 Author Share Posted January 17, 2015 Well, the whole day went by and he never called again. Very disappointing. Thank God I have the trip in the morning to take my mind off things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Well, don't get too down. You never know. Give it a little time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 A second friend I talked with about it, same reaction as the first one...that he was after one thing, he didn't get it, he's fading out. Only one of my friends thinks that he may want time to think about it because of the distance..but I don't believe it. I think I'll never hear from him again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 I would move on completely -he is off your radar - not distracting you from what's important -you - and if he calls you'll see how you feel about it at that time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 I'm bummed for you MM. I was really hoping good things would happen with this one. It's kind of a shock when we realize someone's feet and mouths don't match up...especially when we really want them to. I agree with batya, but I know you don't need to hear it again- you're a tough cookie, and I know you'll put this behind you in no time. People suck sometimes I'm sorry he wasn't the guy he said he was (and the guy you hoped he'd be). Next!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 I'm bummed for you MM. I was really hoping good things would happen with this one. It's kind of a shock when we realize someone's feet and mouths don't match up...especially when we really want them to. I agree with batya, but I know you don't need to hear it again- you're a tough cookie, and I know you'll put this behind you in no time. People suck sometimes I'm sorry he wasn't the guy he said he was (and the guy you hoped he'd be). Next!!! I just wanted to point out that she had no idea who he was or what he was about -he was practically a stranger when they met. I'm not saying he lied but with no context what he said (without knowing him in person or seeing any actions to match his words) is basically meaningless/irrelevant. She knew he probably was safe to meet in person in a public place and she knew they'd probably have a pleasant conversation. Whether he had character/integrity/compatible values to her was unknown. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 I just wanted to point out that she had no idea who he was or what he was about -he was practically a stranger when they met. I'm not saying he lied but with no context what he said (without knowing him in person or seeing any actions to match his words) is basically meaningless/irrelevant. She knew he probably was safe to meet in person in a public place and she knew they'd probably have a pleasant conversation. Whether he had character/integrity/compatible values to her was unknown. Right. I know that and she knows that. But she was excited about him....we all were. Connections are rare, and it seemed like they had one. It's good that MM is able to keep her cool, and was able to keep her eyes open on the date and not jump into bed with him as others would have. I think when you've been OLD for a while, you know your way around...and you (General you)also get those gut feelings when something is going to go good...and it's okay to get excited about those. It's hard to be completely emotionless in dating....I mean, the whole purpose of dating is to find someone to be emotional with, right? I think MM does an amazing job of keeping her heart protected and holding herself separate from men in initial meets/dating, and every once in a while, when we get that feeling, it's okay to be excited. We're not robots. MM isn't lost in a litre of Haagen Daus.... wait....MM, ARE you lost in a tub of ice cream?!?! My guess is, she's on her day trip and meeting new people, and putting herself out there. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happpybear Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 If I could "like" this I would...but not able to in this section Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.