missmarple Posted September 23, 2014 Author Share Posted September 23, 2014 The date with Alonso was very good. He's not exactly my type looks-wise (a bit too skinny) but I reallly liked his personality, we were together for almost 2 hours and didn't stop talking for a second. We talked about lots of things, joked a lot and, in general, had a great time. I don't know if he'll ask for a second date, though...usually men who are interested ask at the end of the first date and he didn't. Guess we'll see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted September 23, 2014 Share Posted September 23, 2014 That sounds promising at least. And men fatten up with a little good home cooking. You can always reach out to him too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 23, 2014 Author Share Posted September 23, 2014 Nah, I don't think he's interested. I talked to him online (found him on the site), he was friendly as usual but no mention of a second date or anything flirty. Oh well, next. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 24, 2014 Author Share Posted September 24, 2014 I feel very disappointed today. I texted Alonso this morning and he replied and we texted a bit back and forth until he stopped talking..but my disappointment doesn't have to do with him..more with online dating, in general. It seems like no guy I like likes me back and every guy I don't like is interested. Kane is still calling me. I think I'm going to take a break from it all. I've been visiting those sites (3 of them daily) for a year or so...it's like a habit and nothing comes out of it. So, I'm thinking I'll stay away from them for a week for starters and see if my luck changes. Meanwhile, I discovered there are some singles events near me...one is this Friday and I had made plans to go there with a friend. Unfortunately, she won't be able to make it and I wonder if I should go by myself but I'm not sure..I've never been to an event like that before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted September 24, 2014 Share Posted September 24, 2014 (((((Miss Marple)))))) Your perseverance is commendable. Reading your journal, learning about your outlook...I have so much respect for you. Maybe a break is needed. Go out with your friends, take new pics of yourself, have some new experiences...and come back in a few weeks and see if you feel different. When was the last time you did a profile overhaul? Have you ever tried letting a friend take over your initial interactions? I'm actually on my friends eHarmony account talking to men on her behalf...she takes it too seriously and it's stressing her out (you're not like that at all- but maybe a different set of eyes could help?) Anyway, you're awesome. And he's out there. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 24, 2014 Author Share Posted September 24, 2014 Have you ever tried letting a friend take over your initial interactions? I'm actually on my friends eHarmony account talking to men on her behalf...she takes it too seriously and it's stressing her out (you're not like that at all- but maybe a different set of eyes could help?) None of my friends is interested in the net, as strange as it sounds (and unthinkable to me...lol). One of them (the one who was to come with me on Friday) has an online profile of her own but she hardly ever logs in to check her own messages...much less mine. It really isn't stressing me out talking to men..what DOES stress me out is that I can't figure out why on earth men I couldn't care less about are interested and the ones I like aren't. I've even wondered if I should act totally indifferent on dates even if I do like someone...because the guys I showed the least interest in (as in not asking them questions, not smiling and almost showing I was bored) are those who at least asked for a second date. But since I hate pretending, I can't do that, either. Thanks for your nice words...I needed to hear something nice today Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 24, 2014 Share Posted September 24, 2014 I went to many singles events by my own and singles resorts. I promised myself I would stay for at least 45 minutes and talk to at least three people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted September 24, 2014 Share Posted September 24, 2014 Singles event coordinators urge people to go alone so that they leave their friend bubble and mingle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 25, 2014 Share Posted September 25, 2014 Singles event coordinators urge people to go alone so that they leave their friend bubble and mingle. That was one reason I went alone. Or I would go with a friend and we would agree to separate shortly after we got there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 25, 2014 Author Share Posted September 25, 2014 Batya, what exactly goes on during those events? This one I'll (probably) be going to is at a bar. I imagine it's not like speed dating, right?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 25, 2014 Share Posted September 25, 2014 Batya, what exactly goes on during those events? This one I'll (probably) be going to is at a bar. I imagine it's not like speed dating, right?? It depends on the event - I would if I were you go to an event that is focused on an activity -other than just meeting and mingling at a bar. I went to events that were dances, cocktail parties, dinners, religious sponsored events, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 25, 2014 Author Share Posted September 25, 2014 Well, I'll be going after all and God help me..lol. Their next events are also at cafes/bars so I don't know if they do dances and dinners and stuff, too. I spoke to a very nice guy on the phone and told him it's my first time in such an event and he said not to worry, 2 members will be at the door to welcome me and introduce me to the others...and the age range is 30-54..so, hopefully, there will be some men in their '40s. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 25, 2014 Share Posted September 25, 2014 That does sound good! I would look into outdoor type groups too -hiking, or indoors -swing dancing/salsa dancing classes (how my friend met her spouse), dinner events where you have a table of 10 people who meet each other (how another friend met his spouse), etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted September 25, 2014 Share Posted September 25, 2014 It's sounds like you're go into have a good night Have fun We have a "it's just lunch" thing here where a matchmaker sends you on lunch dates....maybe if something like that is available, you could give that a go? (Might be hard being a teacher and doing that though) Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted September 25, 2014 Share Posted September 25, 2014 Good luck, I hope you have fun and meet some interesting guys!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 26, 2014 Author Share Posted September 26, 2014 So, as I'm getting ready for the singles event, Alonso texts me: Where are you? Why aren't you in chat? HAHA I texted back that I'm getting ready to go out and he said he just woke up (he was working today) and he hopes I'll have a good time. I said thank you and that was that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quirky Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 Hope you are having fun! I tried a singles event once, it didn't work well for me, I got too drunk lol..mostly because I felt awkward and weird. I did like 2 guys though. But they were friends. But I am curious to see how it was for you. I also understand getting deflated, do have a break if you're not feeling as positive. I think you are extremely resilient Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 27, 2014 Author Share Posted September 27, 2014 Well, I did have a good time last night. The bar was nice, it was in a garden with flowers and stuff and the music was very much to my liking. When I arrived, I found just 6 people from the event at a table...the girl who was in charge, 4 women at around my age and a guy who was...really ugly..lol. I was introduced to them all and I had a nice chat with the woman next to me. Then, slowly, others started arriving and, eventually, we were about 15 men/15 women. I mostly talked with 3 guys, unfortunately all too young for me (33, 38, 39) but nice nevertheless. I didn't like the fact that every 15 mins or so the girl from the site made us change seats (in order to talk to more people) but I guess that's how those events go. She did ask me if I liked someone (so she could put him next to me) and I did like one guy (he must have been around my age) but I was too embarrassed to say and I ended up not talking to him at all. In general, it was a good experience albeit a bit too expensive...20 euros (25 USD) for the ticket that included one drink (I had sangria). It's a good way to meet people if you are the talkative type. The next event is next Friday - it is a wine tasting night and although I don't drink much, I do find it interesting as a concept. 25 euros that one..lol...but, still, I think I'm going to go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted September 27, 2014 Share Posted September 27, 2014 Glad you're going to go! Not all events do the musical chairs thing. I'm glad you went and stayed -impressive! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hodgeheg Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 Hey miss m, sounds like the singles event was fun! And kudos to you for going alone! I became fed up with online dating after about 6 months and left it alone for a while. I met people in more "natural" ways for a while before starting online dating again. Because I had left it a while there were new people when I signed back up, and because I had a new profile I attracted more attention. The third guy I met the second time around has now been my boyfriend for about 6 months. You're attitude to this is brilliant miss m and I hope you will find somebody for you very soon x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 Today I made reservations for the next event, the wine tasting night this Friday. This time a friend is coming with me, too. PS Thanks for the encouragement, Batya and hodgeheg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 3, 2014 Author Share Posted October 3, 2014 First of all, tonight is the wine tasting event and I'll be going with a friend. On other news, I got an email by someone I couldn't remember. After talking for a bit, I realised it's a guy I had met on one of the dating sites, I had liked our conversation very much but, in the end, we never got to meet because there had been some misunderstanding (I expected him to call me on the morning of the day, he called at 7pm) and we stopped talking. We'll see if we manage to meet this time. For now, I'l leave him nameless..lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted October 3, 2014 Share Posted October 3, 2014 I hope tonight goes well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick974 Posted October 3, 2014 Share Posted October 3, 2014 Wine tasting sounds cool, can't wait for your head up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 3, 2014 Author Share Posted October 3, 2014 Well, wine tasting wasn't to my liking at all. First of all, the bar was tiny. Then, there were far less people than the other night...maybe 15. My friend has a problem with her back and there were no chairs, so, she had to sit in a corner. I talked to a couple of guys and the one who was interested in me was 37! There were 3-4 guys around my age but noone seemed to want to talk to me. Finally, I got dizzy...I tried 4 different kinds of wine and, as I rarely drink, and there was nothing to eat along with the wine, it didn't agree with me at all. Overall, it was a failure of a night...and for 25 euros! Next event night is on Saturday but too far for me, an hour away. I may go to the one after that..in 2 weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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