missmarple Posted May 2, 2016 Author Share Posted May 2, 2016 Why continue to chat with him all those times without saying "nice chatting with you but I'm a bit busy -let me know when you know your work schedule" - maybe a compromise where you hint at it at least? There are so many reasons why he might not of gotten back to you yet. He did get back to me...to chit chat about the weather. I don't see why I had to 'remind' him what we had talked about...he's not 15. He had asked to meet, I had said yes and we had talked about it for over 15 minutes...and we had narrowed it down to Monday/Tuesday, as I said. HE was supposed to let me know on Friday and, by Sunday evening, he acted as if we hadn't talked about meeting at all. I want to meet someone but, after having met over 300 guys, I recognize the signs of someone who's wasting my time and I don't want to waste my time any more. I have wasted enough time on guys who were lukewarm about meeting. I have better things to spend my afternoons on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 I recently read that there is a calculation that we have romantic partner compatibility with 1:500 within our age group, that it's a numbers game so meet as many people as you can. That would just take way too long for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 I recently read that there is a calculation that we have romantic partner compatibility with 1:500 within our age group, that it's a numbers game so meet as many people as you can. That would just take way too long for me. Which makes me wonder... how do some people just marry the first person they date? are they that compatible? luck? or are they settling? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted May 2, 2016 Author Share Posted May 2, 2016 Which makes me wonder... how do some people just marry the first person they date? are they that compatible? luck? or are they settling? All 3 reasons, depending on the case. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophie274 Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 All 3 reasons, depending on the case. Aside from all of that, most people tend to meet their first boyfriend/girlfriend in high school or college, which means there is probably already a big degree of compatibility built in (especially for people who meet in college). You are likely to have similar backgrounds, ambitions, interests (I know many universities are very diverse, but people often tend to date others like them within that diverse group), are at the same stage in life ... There's already been a significant pre-selection. It's not like dating the person you sit next to on an airplane! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Oh yes, the other advice in that article was to go to all your favourite places, take up your favourite interests, especially in settings where you get to meet others who share your tastes and interests, and that will definitely increase your chances of meeting a compatible chances, but you still need to meet a LOT of people. Makes sense about people meeting their girlfriends/boyfriends at school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthDallas40 Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 He did get back to me...to chit chat about the weather. I don't see why I had to 'remind' him what we had talked about...he's not 15. I want to meet someone but, after having met over 300 guys, I recognize the signs of someone who's wasting my time and I don't want to waste my time any more. I have wasted enough time on guys who were lukewarm about meeting. I have better things to spend my afternoons on. Totally agree. He was a timewaster, not a real prospect. No need to give him the benefit of the doubt when he was fully capable of creating a good degree of doubt himself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 He did get back to me...to chit chat about the weather. I don't see why I had to 'remind' him what we had talked about...he's not 15. He had asked to meet, I had said yes and we had talked about it for over 15 minutes...and we had narrowed it down to Monday/Tuesday, as I said. HE was supposed to let me know on Friday and, by Sunday evening, he acted as if we hadn't talked about meeting at all. I want to meet someone but, after having met over 300 guys, I recognize the signs of someone who's wasting my time and I don't want to waste my time any more. I have wasted enough time on guys who were lukewarm about meeting. I have better things to spend my afternoons on. I think you've given him sufficient benefit of the doubt by waiting till Sunday night (just before the supposed possible date on Monday) to block and delete, and two days after when he said he would get back to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted May 23, 2016 Author Share Posted May 23, 2016 Three months after I'd last heard of him, John resurfaced. Yes, that John who I had gone on 2 dates with, who had cancelled the 3rd date because he was 'sick' and then never contacted me again. Well, yesterday was my name day (it's a big event over here, bigger than birthdays, a religious holiday..Europeans know about it, I don't think Americans have it) and I got a text message of a flowers bouquet with the words happy name day..and my name. The number was unknown (not listed in my phone, that is) but it is a rather strange number and I was 99% sure it was his. Still, I texted back 'thanks, who is this?' just in case I was wrong (everyone sends happy name day wishes over here) and, sure enough, I never got a response. I'm glad he didn't die from his 'serious' disease..lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 I love your response, while it's true you didn't recognise the number, it also let him know that you had already forgotten about him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophie274 Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 Happy belated name day! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted May 23, 2016 Author Share Posted May 23, 2016 Happy belated name day! Thank you, sophie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie2006 Posted May 26, 2016 Share Posted May 26, 2016 Three months after I'd last heard of him, John resurfaced. Yes, that John who I had gone on 2 dates with, who had cancelled the 3rd date because he was 'sick' and then never contacted me again. Well, yesterday was my name day (it's a big event over here, bigger than birthdays, a religious holiday..Europeans know about it, I don't think Americans have it) and I got a text message of a flowers bouquet with the words happy name day..and my name. The number was unknown (not listed in my phone, that is) but it is a rather strange number and I was 99% sure it was his. Still, I texted back 'thanks, who is this?' just in case I was wrong (everyone sends happy name day wishes over here) and, sure enough, I never got a response. I'm glad he didn't die from his 'serious' disease..lol. So strange! He went to all that "trouble" to send you a text and he doesn't even bother to respond? I'm so glad that you threw that "fish" back into the sea. Happy belated "Name Day" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted May 26, 2016 Author Share Posted May 26, 2016 So strange! He went to all that "trouble" to send you a text and he doesn't even bother to respond? I'm so glad that you threw that "fish" back into the sea. Happy belated "Name Day" Everything about the way he behaved was strange so I wasn't surprised..and thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted May 31, 2016 Author Share Posted May 31, 2016 I just talked to a new guy online. Ross, 50, tall, attractive, never been married, no kids, interesting conversation, etc, etc..but...he left his job 8 years ago and is now trying to get a taxi license. I asked what he's been doing these 8 years. He said he was basically doing nothing, just DJ'ing during the summer...and covering his expenses with money from some flat he's been renting out. This is definitely not my style at all and I've no idea how someone can live like that. On the other hand, he sounds interesting.... I'm just not sure if I want to meet him. At the end of the convo he asked if I want his phone number. I said I'd rather we talked a couple more times and I may give him my number if we seem to have enough things in common. I have to think about this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WithLove Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Why did he leave his job, and what job was it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted May 31, 2016 Author Share Posted May 31, 2016 Why did he leave his job, and what job was it? He said because 'it was summer and it was too far and he didn't like the salary'. It was at some company he had been working at for 12 years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WithLove Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Ehh.... not a good enough reason to leave a place of employment for 12 years. I'm not sure about this guy. I don't think he really has some of your "must-haves". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Ehh.... not a good enough reason to leave a place of employment for 12 years. I'm not sure about this guy. I don't think he really has some of your "must-haves". I agree - seems fishy and not someone who would be a good match for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted May 31, 2016 Author Share Posted May 31, 2016 I'm not sure about this guy. I don't think he really has some of your "must-haves". I agree - seems fishy and not someone who would be a good match for you. Thank you both..you've helped me make up my mind. Indeed, I'm going to pass on this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Lol he quit his job because it was summer and too far away? But the previous 12 years and 12 summers had been ok? And followed by 8 years of no real job. Fishy indeed. Glad you decide to pass on him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted June 25, 2016 Author Share Posted June 25, 2016 I've been having such bad luck with online dating lately (no luck, at all, actually) that I'm this close to giving up. I got a phonecall by someone I had gone on ONE date with...over a year ago. He had called a few times (each time months apart) and I talked to him out of politeness. Well, no more of that. When he told me who he is, I hung up on him..and felt much better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie2006 Posted June 25, 2016 Share Posted June 25, 2016 I wonder why some people do that -- contact someone whom you met only once or twice after an extended period of time. I know that in some cases, the second time around turns out to be a charm. But in most cases, the person who's contacted is left to wonder, why did the they even bother?! There was this one guy. We'd met regularly for a month or so? And I went on holiday for 4-5 days (I can't remember for sure but I know that it was less than a week) and poof! When I contacted him after I got back, it was as though he'd dropped off the face of the earth. I was stupid or desperate (probably both) so when he contacted me ... after 5 months or so? I gave him another chance. Yeah, I learned never to give second chances to people who didn't make the effort to make things work the first time. Miss M, you're smart to have hung up on the guy. That's what I should have done. Anyways, maybe it's time to take a break (?) from OLD for a while, if you're feeling jaded? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted June 25, 2016 Author Share Posted June 25, 2016 Anyways, maybe it's time to take a break (?) from OLD for a while, if you're feeling jaded? I'll take August off..I'll be away on holidays for the most part, anyway. A friend of mine who knows astrology has been saying for months that I'll meet my soulmate in September. I don't believe in astrology that much (not when it comes to predictions and stuff) but who knows? Better in September than never..lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janut1 Posted June 27, 2016 Share Posted June 27, 2016 Im glad to hear Im not the only one having no luck on OLD. I don't know if its because its summer or what but its slowed down quite a bit here. I did reach out to a man who I thought was attractive, liked his profile, etc. He wrote back to me that he was corresponding with another women and feels its only fair he focuses on her. Just a morality thing. I thought that was refreshing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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