missmarple Posted October 20, 2015 Author Share Posted October 20, 2015 I thought you only have a problem if he is in his 60s or look like he is? Did I read that wrong? Lol I consider 59 too old for me on its own. I was just thinking about it because I liked his pics and the rest..but the pics could have been from 10 years ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 20, 2015 Author Share Posted October 20, 2015 The 3rd date with Thad was more or less like the 2 others, except I talked more. We talked a bit about past online experiences (funny stuff that has happened to us) but, through them, we both revealed a bit more about ourselves and our way of thinking. For example, he said that just before he met me, he had gone on 3 dates with another woman from the site who said she wanted to be friends and he told her in that case you could come to my house or I can come to yours and have coffee or watch a movie, we don't need to go out. He said he only goes out with women he's interested in..weird but I guess he meant we're going out because he likes me, not because he wants a friendship. However, in these 3 dates he hasn't made any move or even a compliment to make me feel like he likes me that way...but I guess he does. I paid for his beer tonight, he accepted gracefully. There was no talk of a next date and nothing about his dinner invitation for Saturday. He told me he's going out tomorrow evening, his newphew is in a school play, I told him to have fun and we said 'we'll talk'. My 'problem' now is that, on Saturday, the singles site that holds events, has an event at a bar that I like a lot and I'd like to go...should I make plans to go with a friend or leave the day open for him? I'm thinking that he should have asked (or re-asked) tonight if we were to meet Saturday (his home or anywhere)...am I right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthDallas40 Posted October 20, 2015 Share Posted October 20, 2015 My 'problem' now is that, on Saturday, the singles site that holds events, has an event at a bar that I like a lot and I'd like to go...should I make plans to go with a friend or leave the day open for him? Why not make plans to go to the event with your friend, but be honest and say you're hoping THAD asks you out, so you'd appreciate a free pass to cancel up until late Friday night or early Saturday morning if he does. If a friend gave me that proposition, I'd completely understand and be cool with it... as long as they didn't wait past whatever deadline we set for canceling. And I agree THAD should be in touch soon about meeting again. If you haven't heard from him by Thursday night, I'd make other plans. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted October 20, 2015 Share Posted October 20, 2015 Just re-reading that post where he asked you to his place for Sat, you ended with saying you'll think about it? Perhaps he's waiting for you to let him know? If I was him, I would've followed up at the end of this date to confirm if you made up your mind. Also, he seems to like to invite people to home a lot based on what he said about friends lol...kinda weird to me but ok... I think I would tell him something like "thanks for inviting me for Saturday but I'm not comfortable going to someone's house this soon but happy to do something else on that day". See what he says. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted October 20, 2015 Share Posted October 20, 2015 Why not make plans to go to the event with your friend, but be honest and say you're hoping THAD asks you out, so you'd appreciate a free pass to cancel up until late Friday night or early Saturday morning if he does. If a friend gave me that proposition, I'd completely understand and be cool with it... as long as they didn't wait past whatever deadline we set for canceling. And I agree THAD should be in touch soon about meeting again. If you haven't heard from him by Thursday night, I'd make other plans. That's also a good plan, especially you didn't want to ask Thad out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 20, 2015 Author Share Posted October 20, 2015 Perhaps he's waiting for you to let him know? If I was him, I would've followed up at the end of this date to confirm if you made up your mind. That's the problem.. that he didn't follow up and he didn't even mention when 'we'll talk'..and I don't feel comfortable enough to tell him 'thanks for the invite but..' since it was made 3 days ago and he hasn't mentioned it since. I wouldn't even feel comfortable telling him that I will go (if I had decided to go)...because, just like you, I would ask tonight if we're on for dinner for Saturday if I had been the one who had made the invite. I may do what ND suggests. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted October 20, 2015 Share Posted October 20, 2015 Yep I think ND's suggestion is a good one. And I'm sure your friend would understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 21, 2015 Author Share Posted October 21, 2015 Last night I went to bed early and this morning I had 3 missed calls by Thad. I texted him saying I just saw his calls and asked if everything is ok. 5 hours later, no reply. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 21, 2015 Author Share Posted October 21, 2015 Well, he never got back to me..not nice at all. How hard is it to send a text to at least let me know he's ok? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted October 21, 2015 Share Posted October 21, 2015 Maybe he's not okay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 22, 2015 Author Share Posted October 22, 2015 Thad called today. I asked what had happened the other night, he said he had gotten lost..lol...he doesn't know my streets very well. Then, I asked why he didn't get back to me when I messaged him, he said he 'doesn't do well with text messages'..which is b/s..he could have called. Anyway, we talked for about half an hour about this and that and no mention of Saturday or any next date for that matter. Not sure what's going on with him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WithLove Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 If it was anyone else, you'd have moved on long ago. What gives? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 The facts you do know is that he did not respond to your texts promptly and that he has not made another time/place plan with you. Right now he is not a person you are dating but he might ask you out again in the future. Not sure it makes sense to give even a moment's thought to "what might be going on with him" since you do know those facts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 22, 2015 Author Share Posted October 22, 2015 If it was anyone else, you'd have moved on long ago. What gives? Why would I have moved on? He hasn't done anything that bad. The worst thing he's done so far is not replying to my text yesterday. Not sure it makes sense to give even a moment's thought to "what might be going on with him" since you do know those facts. Well, it's not like it's on my mind 24-7 but I did find it strange that he didn't ask to meet but he did call and talk for half an hour. This isn't something I'm used to. Men either disappear or keep asking to meet. I think it's the first time that, after 3 dates, someone acts like this, so, yeah, I find it strange. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthDallas40 Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 Why would I have moved on? He hasn't done anything that bad. The worst thing he's done so far is not replying to my text yesterday. That's what I thought as well. Patience, people! I think it's the first time that, after 3 dates, someone acts like this, so, yeah, I find it strange. Again, that was my impression too; I didn't get the feeling you were overly invested. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 He likes chatting to a woman who is into him as he knows you are and he so far is not interested in putting in the effort to make another plan to see you. He wants to make sure that if he is interested in seeing you again you'll still be interested. I met several men who wanted to continue chatting or emailing but wouldn't make or commit to a plan to get together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 23, 2015 Author Share Posted October 23, 2015 He likes chatting to a woman who is into him as he knows you are If that's the case, he knows more about me than I do..as I don't know if I'm into him or not. I mean, he's pleasant to go out with but regarding chemistry I have no idea if there is any..for example, kissing him has never even crossed my mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 If that's the case, he knows more about me than I do..as I don't know if I'm into him or not. I mean, he's pleasant to go out with but regarding chemistry I have no idea if there is any..for example, kissing him has never even crossed my mind. I mean he knows that you accepted his date invitations so he assumes you are into him. And if you'll chat with him for a half hour that's another good sign. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 25, 2015 Author Share Posted October 25, 2015 I've heard nothing from Thad since Thursday and I don't expect to, either. Fine by me. On a different note, remember the 59yo guy I decided not to call after all? Well, I talked to a friend about him. She's 55, so, close to his age, also a teacher, divorced, no kids and she has a profile on the same site. I gave her his profile name and said if she likes the profile, I can email him and tell him that I'm dating someone but because his profile is interesting, I talked to a friend about it and give him her profile name to see if he's interested. She's rarely online but she said I can give him her phone number (if she's interested and if he's interested, too, of course). He just seems like a very nice (and handsome) guy..I hope something will come out of it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 25, 2015 Author Share Posted October 25, 2015 I just talked to a new guy online. Taylor, 46, 6'1, brown hair/eyes, single, no kids and lives close to..Thad..lol...and he's a ship inspector. We talked for about 15 mins online, we discovered we had been born in the same neighbourhood (he moved when he was a teen) and then I had to go but gave him my phone number (got his, too) and said he can call me this afternoon..he said he will. While I was talking to him, I got a phonecall from an unknown number. It turned out to be Todd, a guy I had gone out with once...a year and a half ago! A teacher like me. I hadn't been attracted to him but we had chatted a few times and I planned on introducing him to a friend of mine but he had disappeared. Anyway, he told me he had been 'busy' (for a year and a half..lol), that my new pics are great (from my summer holidays), that I've lost weight (6 pounds or so..I was surprised he noticed) and he added me to his list again and said we should go out some day. I said, sure, I'll take my friend along Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted October 25, 2015 Share Posted October 25, 2015 Was he the one who one of your friends was involved with a long time ago and he had been a jerk? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 25, 2015 Author Share Posted October 25, 2015 Was he the one who one of your friends was involved with a long time ago and he had been a jerk? No, I had never met that one in person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 25, 2015 Author Share Posted October 25, 2015 Taylor called me and we talked for about 15 minutes. He was at a cafe, waiting for a friend, which I found strange but anyway. From the conversation, he's not really my type..I felt like he was trying to 'outsmart' me a few times and like he wasn't being himself. Anyway, the talk itself was about basic stuff, where we grew up, our jobs, my cat, our families etc. Eventually, the conversation died and he said we'll talk again..I could have told him we should meet in person but I didn't feel like it at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmarple Posted October 27, 2015 Author Share Posted October 27, 2015 I have a date with a new guy for tomorrow afternoon. Greg is 48, 6'2, brown hair/green eyes/sweet smile, a financial advisor, divorced for 6 years, has a 20yo son, lives close to me and works even closer. He had been on my list for a few days but we only got to talking tonight. He writes very well and we have one thing in common...he appreciates good spelling..lol. We talked for about 15 mins and he said we should meet. I said ok but asked for his phone number first. I called him, he sounded to be my type on the phone (to the point and we only talked about the details of the meeting), he said he has nothing planned for tomorrow and agreed with my suggestions about time/place...I like easygoing men Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 Good luck and have fun with Greg! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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