Snow2tears Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 It's almost been a month after the break up. And I just can't stop thinking about my ex! When I do, all I feel like sadness, regret, and the urge to call him and be like "give us another chance". We didn't end off on a bad note. We were dating for 6 months and over time he just got tired of my clingy ness and he lost sight of what he wanted. Honestly, I don't know if he still loves me or is willing to get back together because he would have contacted me right? And I also know that I shouldn't be wasting my time on him. But it's just so painful always thinking about him when I don't even know if he's thinking about me. Sometimes I feel like I'm really over it and looking into a bright future, and other times I'm looking back and reliving the memories wondering what went wrong. And if we could get another chance. I know that he's not the best for me and it will never be the same even if we did get back together. So why is it that I'm still dwelling and overthinking it when clearly I know what's best. I'm on the right track already. But whyyyyyy I'm becoming so frustrated. We even agreed to be friends but he's not making any effort to talk to me, granted he's not a avid texter and I barely see him at school. When we do see each other he actually talks I guess. I'm just confused, tired, and frustrated with myself right now. I don't know what to do. I should be studying for a chemistry test tomorrow, but I can't even focus. It's my last year of highschool and I know I'll probably not get into another relationship until university but I can't help but feel...impatient for another boyfriend. I know that's probably really bad lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittykat12 Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 Study for your test You have many more boyfriends ahead of you, believe me. If he got tired of your clingyness, then look at fixing that, not for him, but you. Get into sport or social groups. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 I'm really trying to get it into my head, I am working soooooo hard on myself. With the whole "you won't be lonely if you're okay with being alone" or "love yourself before you can love someone else" it's just that in the midst of doing all those things. He's in the back of my mind bringing me down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittykat12 Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 What was life like 7 or so months ago - before him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 Well I was talking to him long before then. I would always Skype with our mutual group of friends. They're more his friends. I don't really remember Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 I think what I'm hurt about the most is that the break up was mainly my fault, I even intiated the break and I regret it. But in the long run I know it was good for me. I just wish I had a clear sense of what I wanted and why I feel this way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittykat12 Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 Then you should really focus on building some solid friendships - or else I think this may happen again with the next BF, noone wants to be someones everything, well I dont think. It is too much pressure -- you will make lots of new friends at uni, and this will all seem like a distant memory Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 I do have some great people who are there for me, I just don't feel satisfied with them because the connection with a boyfriend is different...sigh I guess I know what you mean. It's late for me and I've been stressed this week. Maybe that's why I'm more emotional lately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simplexity Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 it's okay everybody is undergoing in that phase.. it's still early to really recover , just try to still focus on your study .. you'll be fine .. sometimes it would take about at least 90 days to feel at least better , in my experience at least .. just keep posting and journalling here .. and again dont forget to list down or re-read why you both won't work ..take care dear I'm really trying to get it into my head, I am working soooooo hard on myself. With the whole "you won't be lonely if you're okay with being alone" or "love yourself before you can love someone else" it's just that in the midst of doing all those things. He's in the back of my mind bringing me down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simplexity Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 also try to watch check this link and watch the video you need some distraction and a good laughter is better medicine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 Haha thank you, hopefully I won't stay up thinking about this...ugh LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 3, 2013 Author Share Posted October 3, 2013 I read in the forum about reconciliation. Is it bad I keep thinking that once we spend some time away from one another we learn from our mistakes, we can create a new and better relationship? They talked about first talking normally, a little flirting, and then hanging out. Taking it one step at a time as if we're starting over again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustard1234 Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 Get thee to Rori Raye. Stat. Google her. You're welcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kz91 Posted October 3, 2013 Share Posted October 3, 2013 Put it this way, you were fine before you met him and you'll be fine now he's gone. Believe me, I wish it sounded as easy as it looks but sadly it's not! There's gonna be hard days and good days, cherish the good days because they don't come around often. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 4, 2013 Author Share Posted October 4, 2013 I've been thinking, and I realize that what hurts me the most isn't the fact it ended but I lost him as a good friend. All the awkwardness, and tension I have to deal with. If I could have it my way, I want me and my ex to be just strictly great friends. Where we can hang out without a second thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simplexity Posted October 4, 2013 Share Posted October 4, 2013 You will come to that stage if you and both of you manage to overcome your feelings to each other ..i still have my first ex bf as my best friend and we're like best buds till now..he is now married with kids and whatever happened to us just been the foundation of the great friendship we now have Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simplexity Posted October 4, 2013 Share Posted October 4, 2013 Also Snow2tears just remember everytime you feel like trying to win him back again ..just think that you dont want to play with fire because it can hurt & burn ok? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 4, 2013 Author Share Posted October 4, 2013 thanks simplexity. If it's okay, I want to rant. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I hate there is never an obvious explanation. Never a clear black and white line. It leaves so much room for second thoughts. Everyone knows not to feel sad and to just get over them. We know all the reasons why they aren't good for us, but why do we still feel so sad. I'm only seventeen, I have many other things to worry about. Why am I dwelling over one person? When he probably doesn't even give me a second thought. I don't want to become bitter. What is moving on if you just drop them? Shouldn't I be allowed to keep people in my life if I still care about them? Who's to say moving on is about forgetting about someone. That's impossible when they have given you so much to remember. Isn't moving on about being okay without them? Am I not allowed to think good things about him. I'm so confused. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simplexity Posted October 4, 2013 Share Posted October 4, 2013 Moving On isn't about forgetting about someone , it's about accepting that you both are not right or meant for each other and is better off without that person in your life.. Memories will always be there , but the question is, there's nothing much we can't do if the other peson no longer wants to be there for us. We can't forced anyone to stay to us. We can try to brawl with reality but it will jsut prolong and cut your more deeper and will give your more pain than necessary. It's like knowing that fire can be so warm and can give us the good comfort feeling when it's cold but playing with it will get us burn and will leave scars that no one can can heal but only time... Other people can only do so much dear for you, we can share to you what we've experienced, we can give you advices , but at the end of the day it will still be your call .. you are your own hero... No one else can saves you from this wallowing pit of sadness but yourselves .. gather that inner strenght within you to realize that you deserve somuch better than Him Take care ..hopefully you feel better soon.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 4, 2013 Author Share Posted October 4, 2013 Today was a pretty good day. We were able to joke a little today. Even though I feel a little tense, I feel like it will pass. when I think about couple things like prom or see couples, I get a little bothered but I'm sure that will pass too. Weird thing happened though, his best friend who supposedly dislikes me was talking and being a little too comfortable with me (playing with my hair for example) I really don't know what to think of this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted October 5, 2013 Author Share Posted October 5, 2013 Not able to sleep, I keep thinking about my ex. As if we were going to get back together. It wouldn't be natural it wouldn't feel real. But I still feel like id take him back if I could. I don't know if it's because I feel lonely. I want to just lose feelings...I want someone new to come along. Is that wrong? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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