Snow2tears Posted September 24, 2013 Share Posted September 24, 2013 It's been a few weeks since the breakup. My ex and I are able to text and are on good terms. I feel like I'm 60% healed. But recently, my friends have been getting boyfriends or soon to be getting one and I really can't help but feel utterly alone. I understand I have family and friends that care for me and I'm trying my best to keep myself busy. But it's different from talking to friends or family. Having a boyfriend and having that companionship was so amazing. And I miss it. I'm being cautious not to use anyone as rebound. I just hate having these moments of loneliness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonstar89 Posted September 24, 2013 Share Posted September 24, 2013 I know what you mean its been a little over two weeks also but you cant compare yourself to anyone else. Run your own race if your always comparing yourself to others you will alwasy be unhappy, whether your in a relationship or not. Get out and make new friends, good ones who will uplift you and push you into your destiny! When you are okay with being alone and okay with who you are as a person a guy will come along and find that very attractive! As a guy i can tell you right now that that the most attractive thing in a women is her ability to be alone and be okay with it! A girl who just falls for any guy who shows her attention is not atractive to GOOD GUYS, guys who are looking ot get laid wont care and they are a dime a dozen. However if you want beauty for your ashes then use this time to better yourself and move yourself into good things! take a new class, go work out, join a club or take up a hobby or something that will boost your self confidence. Help others who are less fortunate, count your blessings and i promise you will find someone who will truly appreciate you in the way you deserve! =) smile its a great day to be alive Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted September 24, 2013 Author Share Posted September 24, 2013 Tonstar89- you really made my day. It's just what I needed, thank you so much Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonstar89 Posted September 24, 2013 Share Posted September 24, 2013 I am glad i could help =) god bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayru Posted September 24, 2013 Share Posted September 24, 2013 Wow this made so much sense. My ex told me that he needs me to learn to be alone, to grow up and not be so dependent on him, family, or anyone else. I guess guys really do find that attractive huh... 1 month post BU, but after our long talk last night (in which he said that above) I feel like today is day 1! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonstar89 Posted September 24, 2013 Share Posted September 24, 2013 Jayru-I would be careful. what your ex told you is not something a grown up man would tell his ex gf. learning to be alone something you need to learn on your own or be told from a friend, if he is telling you to learn to be alone and not so dependant on him, family and friends he is probably using it as an excuse to break up with you and not cause he is genuinly concerned about your reliance on him and others. What i told snow tears i told her in FRIENDSHIP and out of advice, what yoru ex told you is not something a mature guy would ever ever tell his GF as a reason to break up. If he was mature and true in his intentions he would have told you something like,"i love you very much but our relationship is not good for us" or " I love you and i value you in my life but right now we simply cannot have a healthy relationship." I could be wrong but unless he told you it out of anger he probably was looking for a reason to break up with you. Either way it is true and guys do like women who do not relly on a guy or guys for their self image and happiness. Do what i told Snowtears and you will find the man of your dreams =) dont settle for second best when you know in your heart you deserve better! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knifefight Posted September 24, 2013 Share Posted September 24, 2013 You don't miss him. You miss the IDEA of him. You miss the idea of being with someone who cares, smart, funny, attractive, whatever else quality. Trust me, i'm in the same situation with my ex-gf. You miss the times you had, but you don't miss HIM. He's changed. Always remember that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simplexity Posted September 25, 2013 Share Posted September 25, 2013 This I completely agree... He is no longer the same person . You long for the past and the idea of what was once been. You don't miss him. You miss the IDEA of him. You miss the idea of being with someone who cares, smart, funny, attractive, whatever else quality. Trust me, i'm in the same situation with my ex-gf. You miss the times you had, but you don't miss HIM. He's changed. Always remember that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayru Posted September 25, 2013 Share Posted September 25, 2013 Thank you for the advice.. yeah he told me this during a long 4 hour conversation about why he needed to break up with me. The main reasons according to him are that he cant trust me and the way we communicate is really unhealthy. He told me that for there even to be a chance of reconciliation that I need to mature and learn how to be on my own and learn to communicate with him. I went from my parents house to his house once I got pregnant, and I never really had to be independent. All in all, I think it was an accummulation of all of our issues on top of my neediness that did us in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.