Snow2tears Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 I just broke up with my bf but if you read my other thread. You'll know that we ended off really well. I know that I have to be okay with being alone. My boyfriend had always dealt with things himself and I always admired that. Now that we're friends, he has no obligation to make me happy. I also don't want him to not want to be my friend, because I know I'll be talking to him a lot still thinking we're just friends but that's just the same thing as when I was his girlfriend. I want to learn to give him space and other people space. Especially my friends because i depended on them so much through this break up. im Finally happy. I'm not sure how to become independent again, any advice or suggestions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittykat12 Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 What are you finding it hard to deal with? The boredom? I read a lot and force myself to do things even when i dont feel like it - like cleaning and cooking, it never bothered me before, I used to actually really enjoy cleaning, but at the beginning I had to force myself to do those chores. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted September 12, 2013 Author Share Posted September 12, 2013 It's not boredom, well I guess you're right to some extent but I think it's more of the fact that I'm so used to always being around him and if I'm not with him I'm on Skype with him. And I guess now that we're able to talk normally. I just want to keep talkin and talkin. But I know he needs space. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittykat12 Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 Those are normal feelings - it passes and you just get used to being by yourself. And talk to your friends , that is what they are there for. I guess just dont repeat the same thing over and over again , hard I know Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solamente Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 being a senior in high school, i don't see how you even had time for a boyfriend in the first place . there are soooooo many things to do, and i bet your friends would like to do things with you again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted September 12, 2013 Author Share Posted September 12, 2013 Well I did make the mistake of putting them aside for my bf BUT I still kept my best friend and I feel like everyday I'm making one more is it possible to be friends with your ex. We both ended off mutually and love each other, not IN love. I understand that I have to let things heal but balance that between not cutting him off completely. I'm always trying to find new hobbies I'm passionate about and obviously homework will take much of my time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittykat12 Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 Then you should reconnect with your friends - and try not to do that again, you should always maintain friendships, they are very important Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted September 12, 2013 Author Share Posted September 12, 2013 Can exes still be friends? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittykat12 Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 I really don't think so Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted September 12, 2013 Author Share Posted September 12, 2013 Why is that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SooSad33 Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 They can be i think.. as long as those 'feelings' you had are NO longer there.... IF you do still have those deeper, loving feelings for them it won't work. You know you can't look at them that way..yet. So, aim for maybe many months down the road before you consider it or even a year or more, where you CAN accept just 'being a friend'. If you can't, then i suggest you tell them you can't and why. Otherwise you're going to have that rift between you and it'll cause more 'tension' between you which in turn will just damage & ruin everything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhowe Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 I just broke up with my bf but if you read my other thread. You'll know that we ended off really well. I know that I have to be okay with being alone. My boyfriend had always dealt with things himself and I always admired that. Now that we're friends, he has no obligation to make me happy. I also don't want him to not want to be my friend, because I know I'll be talking to him a lot still thinking we're just friends but that's just the same thing as when I was his girlfriend. I want to learn to give him space and other people space. Especially my friends because i depended on them so much through this break up. im Finally happy. I'm not sure how to become independent again, any advice or suggestions? "Independent again"??? you are in hs....you go to class, hang with friends, do your homework and go to bed. Rinse, repeat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow2tears Posted September 12, 2013 Author Share Posted September 12, 2013 Yes but after being accustomed to him being around. Having that companionship with someone special. It's not easy to just forget someone who gave you so much to remember. Not that I want to forget about him. I want to cherish our memories. I have to change my routine. He's not going to be the one saying Good Night. He's not going to be there when I cry. I'm still trying to learn my boundaries as a friend Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhowe Posted September 12, 2013 Share Posted September 12, 2013 Well, that's understandable. It's only been a day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.