Brokenheart99 Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 Perhaps this isn't the best place to post this. Either way, been about 2.5 months since we split. Lately I feel like ive been doing okay, healing, getting better, being more positive, thinking and missing him less. Ive had a slip up of breaking no contact recently, I just defriended him off fb, I've been keeping busy as I can etc. either way, last few days I've been in a funk, just terrible mood..I can barely bring myself to be cheery and Idk just been in a pretty foul mood last few days. Is that pretty normal? What could be explaining it, just seems so out of the norm given how my healing has been going. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SooSad33 Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 Yes, you can expect all kinds of moods & emotions. 2.5 months isn't that long after. I'm 4 months and still feeling it too. Cpl times a day I still do a little 'break down', have my tears then feel a bit better for a while. Try to get things done and smile with the kids... But then again, by bedtime, I'm really missing him again. and on go more 'deep thoughts & feelings' again. Like i've heard.. it comes in 'waves'. You'll be fine then these emotions creep up again. I've had a lot of anxiety even with med's to help ease it. It is still there a bit. It all sucks..*sigh* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brokenheart99 Posted September 6, 2013 Author Share Posted September 6, 2013 If I was missing him, I guess I would understand, but I don't think it's that I necessarily miss him. I'm just in this terrible mood, I don't feel like talking to anyone or smiling. I'm wondering if it even has anything to do with the break up, I'm sure it does. Hence I figured I would ask to see if anyone has gone through something similar. Is this feeling just a replacement for missing him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bwhite00 Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 yah month+ for me, in constant contact to help myself heal and it's kind of hit or miss opposed to NC as to whether that's a good/bad idea... the anger issues are where i struggle the most. tears for the pain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SooSad33 Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 It probably is related to everything going on. Like you mentioned, 'missing him less' and 'broke nc cpl of times'? See, it is still there, things aren't all gone.. yet. Give it a day or two see if you wake up in a better mood and see if this is just another 'wave/phase'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
savignon Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 If I was missing him, I guess I would understand, but I don't think it's that I necessarily miss him. I'm just in this terrible mood, I don't feel like talking to anyone or smiling. I'm wondering if it even has anything to do with the break up, I'm sure it does. Hence I figured I would ask to see if anyone has gone through something similar. Is this feeling just a replacement for missing him? I can totally relate. It's not about "him" but a major loss can force you to take a look at the rest of your life... Job, living conditions, financial well being, friendships, etc. My breakup was only mildly traumatic in the grand scheme of things but it made me look in the mirror without the distraction of a relationship as a main focus and say...am I happy by myself? Do I have everything I need emotionally, spiritually, physically, financially and life time goal wise? So it's not about "him" but my attention on him is what distracted me from evaluating other areas of my life that I have no choice but to look at now. I've been in a total funk realizing how lonely I am and different areas of my life I let slide while distracting myself with him. A good lesson, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brokenheart99 Posted September 6, 2013 Author Share Posted September 6, 2013 Yeah that might be a good part of it, I neglected and gave up so much of my life to be with him and in general when I was with him. So like now I try to get back into all that I had before and finding other things to do to keep occupied and create in my life. And for a while, it feels okay and I genuinely do have a good time. But it feels like a bandaid trying to cover a gaping wound, eventually the blood seeps through. It's frustrating cuz I always felt pretty happy with him, even tho I deserved better. And I never felt this way. I was happy being unhappy, I guess.. if that makes any sense. The good made up for the bad in some way. But oh well. I hope this feeling goes away soon, Bleh. That's the best word to describe how I feel, Bleh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sadgirl23 Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 I agree the feelings come in waves. I'll think I'm OK or treading water and then some song or thought will pop up and I'll just spiral into a downwards gyre and think I'm going to have a breakdown and contemplate all number of confrontations where I tell him how much he's hurt me. And how ducky I feel. Then it eases off and passes. Bizarre. So sad when you think about how feelings of love and passion for someone come like waves too. They are so nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hopelessincan Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 Yes its normal, but maybe its the weather or heck I'm hoping PMS I've been in a terrible funk for the last five days. I too have been doing things I used to do before him, catching up with friends I haven't talked to in years, going out if invited. Mine started after a really good weekend (forced myself but had fun for the most part). I felt great the holiday Monday, started catching up on housework/repairs, then BOOM, my mood just switched to angry and sad and back again. Something must have triggered it, but I don't know what. In my case, I do know its related to him. Thought I'd sleep it off and it was a passing feeling (like they have been the last 14 weeks) but no, this one just wont pass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brokenheart99 Posted September 7, 2013 Author Share Posted September 7, 2013 Idk I've been having a pretty rough few days. It's been 2.5 months and he's entirely over me I feel. It just seems as such. I know we are over and whatnot, but it's like how do you just up and move on that fast? I hate the finality of it all. I just wanted him to love me in a little way forever even when we were both in relationships. But he's just so happy, unfriended me without a care in the world, ignored what I said to him. Not even anger, not even anything, it's like indifference. I know I need to get to that state too but he beat me in everything. I know I need to focus on my own healing, but this just sucks, it's such a huge blow, huge setback. We dated 3 yrs....2 months post break up and he unfriended me as the dumper saying "our lives have moved in different directions faster than anticipated". We have never been no contact before in our break ups except this one, but I guess this is what no contact does. If worked for him faster than it did for me. Yeah, I know I need to focus on my own healing. And yes I'm not in contact with him, etc etc. I'm just sad, pissy, bummed, hurt all at once. It always seems to suck, I feel like I never get over this idiot. He just up and moved on. Good freaking for him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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