greywolf Posted September 19, 2013 Author Share Posted September 19, 2013 I tend to prefer male patients. I'm not exactly sure why that is. I think I just find them easier to deal with. Males and females both can be needy, but females tend to be more more anxious about their condition, and what to know what every single medication you are giving them is for (nothing wrong with that though), and just generally anxious and stressed. So for women, I make sure to explain everything and tell them what's planned for the day, and what the doctor has ordered, and how their labs are looking. Men tend not to care. I can tell them again and again what medication I'm giving them, or that radiology will be coming to take an x-ray, but it usually goes in one ear and out the other. What they really want is some TLC lol. I was taking care of a patient last week, and at the end of my shift, I told him I was leaving and that the night nurse would be in to see him soon, and he said, "But I don't want you to go." And they always just look so vulnerable when they say things like this, and my heart just breaks a bit. Today I had a patient that was intubated, which is a tube that goes into the lungs, and they can't talk when they are like this. He gestured for me to come over to him, so I approached him and asked him what he needed, but he just took my hand, and then closed his eyes, and I stood there holding his hand like that for awhile. My heart broke just a little again, but I also felt a little embarrassed about it lol. And that's the way they always are. They don't want me to go. They are always happy to see me. And half of them want to know if I'm married lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 22, 2013 Author Share Posted September 22, 2013 I haven't had a full length mirror since I've moved here, and it's kind of liberating. I'm super behind on laundry, so today I wore a shirt that I haven't worn in ages because I always felt self-conscious about how chubby I looked in it. But today I wore it, and I haven't seen myself in a mirror, so I just don't care. I always thought this shirt was uncomfortable too, but it's actually very comfortable. It was just uncomfortable because I was so self-conscious in it all the time! And the really sad part is that I'm not fat. =/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hers Posted September 22, 2013 Share Posted September 22, 2013 How is everything else going? Are you enjoying your new city? Have you made some friends yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 22, 2013 Author Share Posted September 22, 2013 How is everything else going? Are you enjoying your new city? Have you made some friends yet? No friends yet =( I'm not at the point at work yet where I can talk to co-workers when I don't have much to do. I spend my downtime at work studying about my patients' conditions. I think once I get more comfortable and confident, then I'll be able to be friendlier at work. There are a couple of people at work that are my age though, and I have talked to them and they seem nice. I don't really go out much though because I always feel so busy and like I have so much stuff to do, but then I end up wasting time on the internet anyway. *sigh* I've been meaning to check out the downtown area on a Friday because supposedly there have stuff going on, but I never get around to it. But hers, there's no Chipotle here! *cries* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hers Posted September 22, 2013 Share Posted September 22, 2013 I had chipotle in Atlanta a couple weeks ago and it was so wonderful! How are you liking your apartment at least? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 22, 2013 Author Share Posted September 22, 2013 I had chipotle in Atlanta a couple weeks ago and it was so wonderful! How are you liking your apartment at least? I love my apartment. It's right next to the hospital. It's quiet. Though I suspect that may change once people start moving in. I think only half of the apartments here right now are occupied, and my neighbor told me the rest are owned by snowbirds. One of my neighbors actually works at the hospital too, and I see him at work, but he works nights so I rarely see him outside of work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tiredofvampires Posted September 22, 2013 Share Posted September 22, 2013 Congratulations on the job! That scenario with the call lights sounds like something that would happen to me...or any beginning nurse! If anyone has to be in the hospital, they should want a nurse like you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 22, 2013 Author Share Posted September 22, 2013 Congratulations on the job! That scenario with the call lights sounds like something that would happen to me...or any beginning nurse! If anyone has to be in the hospital, they should want a nurse like you. I'm glad you have confidence in me, because I have none for myself lol. I've been a little frustrated at work because the hospital has overstretched themselves in hiring new grads, so I've been shuffled around with preceptors, and that really increases my stress because I don't like going to the hospital wondering who my preceptor is going to be for that day. I'm also supposed to be training in the stepdown unit now but they still have me in ICU because there are no available nurses to train me in stepdown. That scares me because in ICU we get 2-3 patients while in stepdown I'll be getting four! So I had a different preceptor last week, and while she was really nice, I felt like she was expecting me to do more than I felt capable of. My old preceptor knew exactly where I was at and I always felt comfortable with her. But this new one was like, "Oh this is your 4th week? Ok here's the patient. Have fun." And it was a patient with a higher acuity than I'd ever had before and I felt so lost. Then at the end of the day she told me that I lacked confidence and that I went through 4 years of school and I should have more confidence in myself, and it came accross more as scolding rather than constructive criticism. I feel really annoyed by that now. Of course I lack confidence! How is telling me that I should have more confidence actually supposed to help me be more confident? How about telling me about my strengths? UGH. And I actually don't lack confidence in any of my skills. I lack confidence when it comes to decision making, but I figured that would come with time (as it always has in my experience). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted September 22, 2013 Share Posted September 22, 2013 I agree with TOV, anyone would love to have you as their nurse. I wish my department got to wear a pretty color, we are in this God awful khaki. We look like we belong in a women's prison. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 23, 2013 Author Share Posted September 23, 2013 I agree with TOV, anyone would love to have you as their nurse. I wish my department got to wear a pretty color, we are in this God awful khaki. We look like we belong in a women's prison. haha. You're in housekeeping, right? Housekeeping color at my hospital is this maroon color. I've seen women wear maroon scrubs, and the men where a maroon polo shirt with black slacks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 haha. You're in housekeeping, right? Housekeeping color at my hospital is this maroon color. I've seen women wear maroon scrubs, and the men where a maroon polo shirt with black slacks. Yep. Well, I'm technically in Laundry but housekeeping and us are in the same department. Maroon is what male CNAs wear with us, CNAs are light pink. Our LPNs were light blue, RNs dark blue, and nursing supervisors wear white. I just want a second color to pick from dangit, lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 23, 2013 Author Share Posted September 23, 2013 Yep. Well, I'm technically in Laundry but housekeeping and us are in the same department. Maroon is what male CNAs wear with us, CNAs are light pink. Our LPNs were light blue, RNs dark blue, and nursing supervisors wear white. I just want a second color to pick from dangit, lol I remember that our sitters wear khaki. You're right, it does look lame. lol. CNA's wear ceil blue. And then everyone else wears some variation of blue. Honestly, I don't know what the point is. I don't think patients can keep track of all these colors anyway! We can wear holiday scrubs 2 weeks before a holiday, and I'm trying to figure out if Halloween counts... >_> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 So many years ago when I was nursing, we wore starched white. I kid you not - and starched little caps. Mostly, nurses wear navy here these days, but where I work, none of us, including nurses wear any type of uniform. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 Period stains??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 I remember that our sitters wear khaki. You're right, it does look lame. lol. CNA's wear ceil blue. And then everyone else wears some variation of blue. Honestly, I don't know what the point is. I don't think patients can keep track of all these colors anyway! We can wear holiday scrubs 2 weeks before a holiday, and I'm trying to figure out if Halloween counts... >_> I thought the same but they tend to quickly keep up with it. It also helps when giving directions - "You need to find a patient on the over night ward? Just head down that hall until you see someone in dark blue and they will be able to tell you." haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 23, 2013 Author Share Posted September 23, 2013 Period stains??? I know, right?? I am just not willing to risk it... >_> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 Can I tell you something TMI? One day out of my period is insanely heavy. In about 30 minutes, I bled through an overnight pad, and soaked through my underwear. Thank goodness I was wearing a black skirt and was on my way home. I cannot imagine wearing anything but black on that day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 23, 2013 Author Share Posted September 23, 2013 Can I tell you something TMI? One day out of my period is insanely heavy. In about 30 minutes, I bled through an overnight pad, and soaked through my underwear. Thank goodness I was wearing a black skirt and was on my way home. I cannot imagine wearing anything but black on that day. haha. It's my turn for TMI now. This was something I never ever ever had to worry about. On my worst days, I could get by with a pantyliner. But I have an IUD now, and sometimes I forget how heavy it gets. Sometimes it's so heavy that my tampon seems full as soon as I put one in. =/ So one day I was at the hospital, I had one tampon and one pantyliner, and I had to just manage with those, and it was awful. Terribly terribly awful. =/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 Surely there must be a stock room somewhere.....? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 23, 2013 Author Share Posted September 23, 2013 Surely there must be a stock room somewhere.....? Maybe?? I'm too shy to ask. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 23, 2013 Author Share Posted September 23, 2013 I'm feeling a little frustrated with work. On paper, this hospital has an excellent new grad program. Follow through has been a different matter. I started out with a preceptor in ICU. Last week I was supposed to start orienting in the unit that I was actually hired for (stepdown), but my preceptor was already orienting someone else! So it was another week in ICU for me. This week they're going to have me orient in telemetry. The patients in telemetry are similar to patients on a regular med/surg floor but require cardiac monitoring. The reason they are having me orient here is so that I can get used to having a higher patient load. In ICU we get 3 patients at the most, two is more usual. In stepdown, I'll be getting 4. Tele nurses get 5 patients. My first preceptor has been concerned about how they are handling the situation for me. When she saw that I was still orienting in ICU, she said that they need to have me orient in stepdown so I can get used to having 4 patients. I told her they were going to have me orient in tele for awhile so that I could get used to more patients and she said, "But it's not the same. They are all walkie-talkies over there." Ah! I dunno! I am not good with this stuff. I know there are some people who are very flexible and can just step right in and take what comes to them, but I need way more structure to feel comfortable. Not knowing who my preceptor is going to be when I get to the unit stresses me out so much. I worry that the new preceptor is going to expect more than I am capable of. That they're going to think, "You've been here for four weeks and you can't do this yet?" Sometimes I have really good days where I feel like I'm learning and doing well, but most of the time I get home and just want to cry with worry about all the things I possibly did wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 23, 2013 Author Share Posted September 23, 2013 Bah! One more rant and I'm done for the day. I see sooo many posts from my old classmates about working (the ones that found jobs), and how hard being a nurse is, and stuff like, "I just finished a very hard shift, my poor feet/back/etc." And it annoys me so much because we have tons of classmates that don't have jobs yet. I just want to be like, "Oh yeah, boo-effin-hoo, your life must be sooo hard because you have a job!" UGH /rant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 26, 2013 Author Share Posted September 26, 2013 I experience a lot of guilt in my life because I have these extremely high standards for how I should run my life that I never meet. I have the day off today, and as usual, I planned to get a ton of things done, but instead, I was so exhausted that I slept in till 10. And then stomach cramps, nausea, and lightheadedness have kept me on the couch for most of the rest of the day. The moments where I've felt well enough to get up, I've swept the floor and done my laundry. And yet, I feel guilty about it. I probably wouldn't feel so guilty if I was super productive every single day, but I'm always slacking off and getting distracted by every single thing, that I never accomplish as much as I should, even on good days. So when the boyfriend called and asked me how I was doing, and when I replied that I felt like crap, and that I felt even worse that I hadn't done anything all day, and when he kept on trying to suggest that I go do something, and I kept on trying to explain that I didn't feel good, and when he replied that he "didn't have any solutions" for me then, I was glad he was not in the same room, because I may have become violent (if I had any energy to get up off the couch, that is). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 29, 2013 Author Share Posted September 29, 2013 I feel embarrassed about this because mostly, it's gross, and second, because I feel ashamed about it in general, but for some time, I've wondered if I have mild IBS. My parents consider it a psych disease though so I don't feel comfortable talking to them about it, and anyone else that I might feel comfortable talking to about it aren't health professionals, so I'm really on my own on this one. I don't even know if there's such thing as mild IBS. Bah. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted September 29, 2013 Share Posted September 29, 2013 psych disease? no. you know the answer is no. it's a microbial and auto-immune disease. that's been pretty well established in recent studies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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