oglez1990 Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 Hey, this is my first post on this site so unsure if this is the right place. Either way, I met a girl on a dating site. We first started speaking in January this year but we were both too busy and only met up in mid-June, but stayed in contact with Facebook. We had two short dates (max 2hours) and she expressed how much she enjoyed it. She agreed to a third date, but cancelled without rearranging, and then claimed her phone broke when she didn't reply, and when I asked her outagain said she had no money to meet. I asked her out again on Tuesday (thisweek) but after a pretty long text conversation, she said ''its been tearing me apart because you're the perfect guy for me but I'm just not ready for a relationship, but I value our friendship''. I still have strong feelings for her and don't know if we can just be friends. What can I do? Maybe we can stay friends, still meet up and if we still feel chemistry we can try again when she feels ready? That's whatI want, as I'm trying to avoid being trapped in the friendzone forever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhowe Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 You are barely friends --- and she isn't ready for a relationship. The "phone broke" is as old as the hills as an excuse. I would just keep looking for the right person....this one isn't it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow Bird Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 I have never believed that there is only one perfect person for everyone. I believe there are several people that come into your life that can be right for you. This woman you are posting about came into your life as one of those that is a possible perfect for you kind of thing. BUT she is only ONE of those. She didn't come at the right time, so tell her it's ok to be friends (odds are you probably won't hear from her again anyway but say that to keep the door open). In the meantime, continue your search for another woman that's right for you and she's also ready to enter into a relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laura40 Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 Agree with mhowe, she isn't ready for a relationship. I wouldn't suggest being friends with her either OP, if you have feelings you'll only end up getting hurt more. I suggest that you move on and find a girl who does want a relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oglez1990 Posted August 1, 2013 Author Share Posted August 1, 2013 I just keep thinking theres a way I can make it better, or for us to try again and see if there is something, and that she may change her mind. We've spoke everyday basically for the past 7months, what will happen if we go a few days or weeks without contact? Will she change her mind? Shes already suggested we should meet again. Maybe Im just thinking stupid and need a few weeks to get over it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhowe Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 There isn't. Texting is not a relationship. Reality is a relationship, and her reality does not not include being in a relationship. You are not thinking stupid --- but you aren't thinking logically either. Don't text --- and see how long it takes her to reach out to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laura40 Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 You'll feel completely different in a few weeks, you'll probably be over her. She's only just told you she doesn't want a relationship, so emotions are high. Cut the contact with her, it's not good to keep in contact with her at the moment as you'll only end up developing more feelings and getting more hurt. If you feel in a few weeks you can be friends then sure, suggest being friends, but at the moment just have no contact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selfsabotage Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 Read corey wayne's book Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted August 1, 2013 Share Posted August 1, 2013 i feel like she's hiding something. and I don't understand why it took 6 months to meet, unless you're an astronaut and were away on a space mission... anyway, i'd just move on and find girls who do want to date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kendahke Posted August 2, 2013 Share Posted August 2, 2013 too late--you're there. Keep dating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thejazzynator Posted August 2, 2013 Share Posted August 2, 2013 I think that you shouldn't pursue her it'll only be a waste of time. Give it time, move on and talk to somebody else, focus on other things. Let her come to you, and if she is the one she will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selfsabotage Posted August 2, 2013 Share Posted August 2, 2013 too late--you're there. Not necessarily, drop off the face off the earth stop contact completely, stop being her girlfriend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oglez1990 Posted August 2, 2013 Author Share Posted August 2, 2013 Shes still communicating with me, only throughTwitter, but shes said we should meet again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selfsabotage Posted August 3, 2013 Share Posted August 3, 2013 Shes still communicating with me, only throughTwitter, but shes said we should meet again. Thats good then, call her in a week and arange a date, make it fun and easy. Leave the relationship talk up to her do not mention it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selfsabotage Posted August 3, 2013 Share Posted August 3, 2013 And stay off twitter until then dont communicate with her unless she contacts you during that week. Do not ignore her communication Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oglez1990 Posted August 3, 2013 Author Share Posted August 3, 2013 I guess thats a good sign maybe she just wanted to take things slower. Or maybe she wants me now shes scared of losing me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selfsabotage Posted August 3, 2013 Share Posted August 3, 2013 When she said she wasn't ready for a relationship, you tell her that your not either, tell her you want to keep it fun and see where it goes that you have no expectations. The reason she probably said she wasn't ready for a relationship perhaps is that you conveyed that you were. Preasuring her will cause her to back away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted August 4, 2013 Share Posted August 4, 2013 You only had two in person dates. She's not interested. I think you shoud just let it go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.