zentoCC Posted May 28, 2014 Author Share Posted May 28, 2014 I thought of an alternative so I see him and go out with him and my family but he's trying to persuade me not too. He doesn't want to see my family I think. I'm seeing the lion king tonight, I don't feel in the mod for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted May 29, 2014 Author Share Posted May 29, 2014 I think we're back to arguing again. I'm starting to think nothing has change since last time. I tried to slow things down and avoid the honeymoon period, maybe I didn't do enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted June 25, 2014 Author Share Posted June 25, 2014 Things seem to be going very quickly at the moment. I'm hardly getting any time to study. I've been told to take it easy the next two weeks as I've over stretched a tendon in my left leg. It's actually been an on and off problem since I was 15 but it got to the point I was limping and it was affecting my knee and back. I can't sit with my leg crossed, well I can but it hurts to get out of it. So no karate. The job search is going .... on. I'm signing up with a recruitment agency as they're the best way to get a job in my chosen career. T has a new job he starts next week. It's not really what he wants but it has the hours he needs. He's been really sweet to me the last few days. He drove me and my friends to my friends and my joint birthday dinner and picked me up despise the fact he's really tired. He also took Friday off so we can have our date night. He's been suffering with hay fever so he's been grumpy and tired. He hasn't stayed over for over a month. It makes me feel a bit sad but I know we'd end up fighting if he stayed over so I haven't pushed. He says he should be feeling better in about a month. I had my cholesterol tested 3.55 which is apparently good. I have low blood pressure though, and I'm borderline overweight. I find it hard to lose weight though and I feel healthy my measurements are 38,30,39 as of Friday. I thought I might have lost a bit off my bust as my bras have been feeling a bit bigger, I've been doi g a lot of abs work outs and have just started squatting, hello less jiggly bum! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted June 29, 2014 Author Share Posted June 29, 2014 T has been being so nice to me it's almost suspicious. I'm really enjoying it though. We've both been suffering from hayfever today. It really wipes you out. I've had to put a stop to my workouts my leg is still bad, I can't even feel any improvements with it. I'm in a house full of guys! They're all watching football, I decided not to I did yesterday though. I'm not interested enough to waste every evening on it. I'm not even sure wht the rules are but I've learnt a few, not sure if that's a good thing or not. I'm procrastinating I wanted to do my sowing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted June 30, 2014 Share Posted June 30, 2014 Hope your leg gets better soon CC. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 11, 2014 Author Share Posted July 11, 2014 Thanks Silver, it's still not quite better but I managed to walk to the train station today so it's getting better. I'm going to the horse races today with work so I'm definitely going to be testing it. I haven't seen much of T lately I saw him for a total of 6 hours last week one of which he slept through. His new job has given him loads of hours and he's tired, he's also hayfevery. We haven't had sex in over three weeks and we've hardly been contacting each other. We've sort of been fighting too. I say sort of because its been more of the few texts we do send being about the fact we're not sending any. I've spoken him every day sort of. Just confirming I'm not seeing him and saying goodnight. I saw him last night for two hours, he just constantly asked me what was wrong which really started annoying me. The worst part is I think I've got a crush on a guy at work. I keep fantasising about sleeping with him. He'll be at the races tonight. T said he'll pick me up from the races and we can see each other then as we won't be seeing each other at the weekend. I feel like I should because other wise I'll only see him for two hours this week but I don't really want to see him. My housemates ate having a party and I'd rather go to that, I don't know if T will go or not. At the moment when I think of T I just want to be left alone. Sent from my RM-914_eu_euro1_337 using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 11, 2014 Author Share Posted July 11, 2014 So he did pick me up but he didn't want to come in just dropped me off and left don't even know why he bothered. I had a good time at the races, I'm still a bit drunk. Lost a bit of money too . One of my horses won at least. Hopefully I'm going to have my hair done tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Well have a good weekend, and sounds like you had a good time at the races. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 15, 2014 Author Share Posted July 15, 2014 I think I'm at the point of breaking up with him. I'm shaking even writing this. I didn't think I'd end up here again. I'm trying to talk to him but he just ignores me the only way he'll contact me is by text and he barely responds. It's the same old argument over and over. When he gets busy he completely shuts me out and I barely here from him and when I do he just takes out his frustrations on me. I'm not strong enough for this, I can't argue as well as him. He asked me why I hadn't said I love you recently, we'd barely texted for days. I'm meeting him at 8:30 on Thusday, I'll guess I'll see what happens then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 All the best ZCC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 15, 2014 Author Share Posted July 15, 2014 Thanks Silver. You have no idea how much it means to have people who only want the best for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Hugs CC. Keep us posted! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 17, 2014 Author Share Posted July 17, 2014 So we ended up meeting last night. We're still together, he said he'd try more and I woke up this morning to a text. I think I got him to realise that I matter too, that he can't just ignore me because he's got other things in his life, we all get busy. I told him if he put as much effort into arguing with me as he did just contacting me generally we wouldn't have these fights. I think that made him think. We'll see how it goes. Good news is that hay fever season is nearly over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 Fingers crossed that it works out CC. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 18, 2014 Author Share Posted July 18, 2014 I just found out a guy who I worked with hung himself yesterday. He quit his job last week, we had know idea that it was that bad. He was a nice guy. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 That's very sad CC. I'm sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjkk Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 Omg, I'm so sorry to hear that! It's heartbreaking. Hugs to you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 19, 2014 Author Share Posted July 19, 2014 Thanks guys. I went out to dinner for my sisters graduation yesterday, it was fun. All her boyfriends family came it was the first time I'd properly met them they were nice. I went to comiccon with my sister. We had to queue for four hours to get in but we had fun when we weren't drowning in the torrential rain, haha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 22, 2014 Author Share Posted July 22, 2014 So the good luck keeps rolling in. It's the first time in weeks I get to spend the evening with my bf and I have a cold and am possibly on my period (I think my cold might have stopped it). We have had sex in over a month. I guess it could be worse, I just don't wanna find out how. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Oh well, Hope you get to snuggle up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 22, 2014 Author Share Posted July 22, 2014 We did more an just cuddle. seems I had the shortest period ever. Plus he didn't seem to care I was ill, haha. He had to wait an hour and a half for me in the opticians, my appointment was really long because I've been having problems with my contacts. I got new glasses though, I really like them. I had to get the pair on display because they were out of stock. I looked them over and they seemed fine. I got them half price because I'm on a contact lens scheme. It was nice to have a good day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 25, 2014 Author Share Posted July 25, 2014 Cannot decide whether to go the pub or not. It's perfect weather and nice company but I'm tired and ill and I've got loads to do. I just have a hard life if that's all I can complain about haha. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 28, 2014 Author Share Posted July 28, 2014 I ended up leaving work at 11 today. I felt so bad, my head was pounding and I felt out of sorts. As soon as I got away from my computer and the noise of the office I felt so much better. I've been in bed all day reading. I feel a bit guilty, I can never sleep in the day, I tried but got bored after 45 minutes. I feel like I shouldn't be reading on work time. I also haven't really got any food in the house. I had a pizza about 2. I didn't feel hungry but I thought I should eat. I'm not sure what I'll have for my dinner. I dropped some cake I made off at my parents, I was supposed to go for dinner there. I've missed so much karate, there's no way I can grade in September. I already know I'll be missing at least on lesson in August because I'm going to Edinburgh. I had fairly good weekend at least, I didn't feel 100% but I took it fairly easy and Tom stayed over for the first time in months and he cuddled me loads which was really good. Being ill really brings you down, I can't exercise I'm not eating right and it makes me realise how little I've accomplished recently. I've been applying for jobs for months but I still haven't even had a rejection letter let alone a interview. Maybe I should just give up and stay where I am. Which I was told on Friday I will be until March any ways. This is turning out to be one hell of a long secondment, and I know when they make it permanent they're going to make me apply for it, yet another job I don't really want but I'll have to do it because I can't get the career I want despite the abundance of jobs in it. I've even considered quitting and volunteering but I only have enough savings for about 5 months and I won't get any help from the government because it's my fault I'm out of work. Besides it's a bit extreme, guess I just need to plod on and stop feeling so sorry for myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Please don't quit without another job to go to! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted July 30, 2014 Author Share Posted July 30, 2014 I won't, I'm just in a funk I can't get out of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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