zentoCC Posted March 9, 2014 Author Share Posted March 9, 2014 I swear my eyes are have more blue in than they used too. I have hazel eyes and I used to have a blue sploge at the bottom now it seems to have spread up the side of my eye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 9, 2014 Author Share Posted March 9, 2014 I did my charity run. It wasn't as hard as I thought. I did struggle a bit after 3k because it was up hill, I'm was going to walk if I still was struggling at 4k but I missed the sign so ended running to the finish. probably a good thing. Now to go around. Collecting money off of everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted March 10, 2014 Share Posted March 10, 2014 As I am lazy. It I enjoy walking.Running is just too much effort for me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 10, 2014 Author Share Posted March 10, 2014 Haha, I prefer walking to but running is quite good exercise. I went round to T's briefly yesterday all is family was there. It was a bit weird to see them again but they made it seem like I hadn't even been gone. That put me more at ease. I got to see his niece too, she's really cute. I wanted to hold but I thought I'd better not as I have a cold. His Mum said I'd lost weight and I looked good. At the risk of sounding vain, I really wish I'd took some before and after picture because I can't see it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 10, 2014 Author Share Posted March 10, 2014 My head feels a bit mushy today. Probably doesn't help it's a Monday. I've been over thinking on a lot of things and wondering how open is to open in a relationship? I was also wondering if I'm ok with how career is going, worrying I'm getting old, am I developing feeling too fast and how do I slow them down, am I going to get hopelessly lost in Japan and miss my plane back, what if I can't have kids etc, etc. Basically I'm a crazy person, hopefully I'll find out it was the hormones, if not..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 12, 2014 Author Share Posted March 12, 2014 I feel much better after seeing T last night. He answered any questions I had. Most were just random ones I thought of but a few I cared about the answer too.. He answered one even though he didn't want to at first. I'm starting to feel like I could push him too far if I wanted to because he wants it to go right this time. That's a bit scary. Today I woke up the my lower eyelids swollen. I googled it and after coming up with a load of scary stuff I found it's probably because my eyes got too dry with my contacts in. At least they're not as sore as they were this morning. Work is hectic at the moment. A colleague isn't happy so she's called in sick so the rest of us have to cover for her. Karate tonight and I'm actually looking forward to the gym tomorrow as I didn't go last week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 15, 2014 Author Share Posted March 15, 2014 I'm drunk and I'm happy. I'd been feeling a bit irrationally annoyed at T but we sorted it especially when I got drunk enough to blurt it out, I know I shouldn't need alcohol but sometimes it helps. We had a nice night and he's coming downstairs to bed now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted March 15, 2014 Share Posted March 15, 2014 Good to hear you are happy CC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 18, 2014 Author Share Posted March 18, 2014 Thanks Silver, I am happy for the most part. I've been silently keeping up with your journal lately but I'm glad your doing well. T just came over, I kicked him out early because I'm really tired but I wanted to quickly update on here before I went to bed. He wanted to talk, he knows I don't really want to tell my Mum we're back together because of how we broke up (I told her everything). I know she's going to question it and I don't know if I'll be able to answer her questions and I don't want there to be tension. The truth is I don't think I processed what happened very well, I find it hard to think about and I just have this sense of intense sadness around it. I accept now that it was a misunderstanding but some part of my brain finds it hard to reconcile with my memories. After he left I thought of a question I want to ask him but I'm not seeing him now until Friday. T did mention something about me being 110% about this. I'm not sure if he's right or not. I'm also a few days away from my period and I'm getting quite worried about how painful they might be. The good news is that they seem to be evening out. Apart from that thinks are going well, hopefully I'll be ready for my holiday and everything will eventually sort itself out. I just nearly lost this post by accidentally hitting 'reply to thread' I don't know what I would do without the undo button! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted March 18, 2014 Share Posted March 18, 2014 Sorry if I sound daft, I thought that T was a new boyfriend. No judgements from my end or anything. But is he the guy you broke up with when you first came to ENA? If he really wants to get things right this time, then that is great, and it would see. That the time apart has been a very good thing for the relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 19, 2014 Author Share Posted March 19, 2014 Yeah he is also my ex. The time apart has definitely been good for us. It's weird being in an old but new relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted March 19, 2014 Share Posted March 19, 2014 Well. That's Nic to hear CC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 20, 2014 Author Share Posted March 20, 2014 Got my passport and adapters, ordered my money and photocopied my passport, downloaded some more books onto my kindle and started a list of things to pack. I'm still not done! We went out last night for my Dad's birthday my sister was to busy with her boyfriends family. It was nice though, I had a really nice prawn and salmon risotto. I got my Dad a really mean card but I made up for it with his favourite beer. I probably should be getting stuff done instead of wasting time on here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 20, 2014 Author Share Posted March 20, 2014 I was supposed to go to T's tonight but because I was tired and hate driving in the dark when I'm tired I asked him to come to mine. He didn't react enthusiastically and I don't know if it just me being oversensitive because I'm tired but it made me think about last time we were together and now I'm close to tears. It's definitely something I'm going to have to work on. Especially as he'll be here soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 22, 2014 Author Share Posted March 22, 2014 Finally started packing last night. T came round earlier than I expected, just as I stubbed my tie on the bed I nearly passed out it was that painful. We had a nice evening together. Its good that it's all fun and light before I go away. It makes me worry less. I think I'm almost sorted just a few things to finish off I'm having a harder tine deciding on what to wear today and the day after I get back than what to take on holiday. I'm staying at my parents the night before and after so it's easier for lifts. The receptionist at work commented that I didn't look excited enough, but I'm worried about being so far away for long and she's asked me about my holiday 5 times a day for weeks! I'm glad to be off just so I don't have to answer the same questions over and over again!!!! Ahh, well better get back to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 22, 2014 Author Share Posted March 22, 2014 Left my house, at my parents. Just need to buy a couple of things from the shops and post a letter. Going to visit my Nan in a bit. I think I've packed reasonably. Its not too heavy and there's quite a bit of room in there for stuff to buy. I didn't get a goodnights sleep, I haven't all week really, so I'm feeling a bit down. I'm quite nervous about this trip all of a sudden I think I have to much information so I have loads of things I now know could go wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 22, 2014 Author Share Posted March 22, 2014 Ok I've read some more and it seems like I don't need to worry about how much I've packed. I'll be happy when I get to the hotel there's going to be about 24 hours of travel! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted March 22, 2014 Share Posted March 22, 2014 have a great time CC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 23, 2014 Author Share Posted March 23, 2014 Thanks! Currently at the airport waiting for the gate to open. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 23, 2014 Author Share Posted March 23, 2014 Omg, it's opened! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 23, 2014 Author Share Posted March 23, 2014 Second flight is delayed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 23, 2014 Author Share Posted March 23, 2014 Spending the night in Paris. I'm quite tired and sore. Not the best start to a holiday. Hopefully the plane will be at 10:45 tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted March 30, 2014 Author Share Posted March 30, 2014 We're just leaving Kyoto after an amazing 5 days. Off to Osaka next to relax. We need it after going to so many temples. We're hopefully going to Universal Studios. Which will be a change. Hope everything's going well for everyone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 (((((((((ZCC))))))))) Have a GREAT time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zentoCC Posted April 3, 2014 Author Share Posted April 3, 2014 I had a strange dream last night. It was Christmas in summer and my sister (the one I'm not as close to) gave me a baby book for my future kids that she'd designed herself she'd also written a touching speech in it. It was a very odd dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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