jonny15 Posted March 22, 2013 Share Posted March 22, 2013 The older you get the more likely you are going to find people that want someone who has considered marriage as a possibility for a relationship. I know it sucks to ponder that and I say that as someone who is experiencing my first exclusive relationship. Heck, even before we were exclusive she was the only person that dated me after the first date. I'm 30 and in my first (and maybe only) relationship with a woman that can see a bright future with. Here's a though to ponder, if you find someone that you connect to emotionally and trust. And the relationship lasts over a year, are you saying you can't see yourself talking about a future with them? If I had been with them a year, then yea, I guess the thought of a future with them could be possible. But even then, I wouldnt want them talking about marriage or babies. Heck, I don't even want kids. But on the other hand, I do feel like i've missed out on life. So I wouldn't be looking for the first one to be my only one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted March 22, 2013 Share Posted March 22, 2013 Do date and be physically intimate with. Basically, a normal relashionship for someone my age. The marriage and family stuff is something I am not currently even close to looking for. I haven't even had a date yet, so I have no want for the marriage thing. OK that's more specific. Figure out what you're willing to do to achieve that goal and what you're not willing to do and accept and understand any downside of what you're not willing to do so that you're not tempted to have a pity party of why you're not meeting anyone. I do think it's essential to work on good and warm eye contact but that's just me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachopin77 Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 A lot of people are saying it would be weird to just tell a guy they are cute when you see them, but as a girl, I've had random people tell me the outfit I have on looks very nice or I have a beautiful smile, and it always brightens my day. Even if its people I'm not attracted to. (its usually girls or older men and women who tell me if they are random strangers). Is it different for guys? Like if I were to tell the guy at the cash register or something "hey you're pretty cute" or "You have really nice eyes" as I paid for something. I feel like no matter who tells you, I feel like its a confidence booster because SOMEONE recognized a nice quality you have and went out of their way to tell you. I don't know though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 Like if I were to tell the guy at the cash register or something "hey you're pretty cute" or "You have really nice eyes" as I paid for something. I feel like no matter who tells you, I feel like its a confidence booster because SOMEONE recognized a nice quality you have and went out of their way to tell you. I don't know though. Yes, that would be a confidence boost. It would feel really good to be told that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 A lot of people are saying it would be weird to just tell a guy they are cute when you see them, but as a girl, I've had random people tell me the outfit I have on looks very nice or I have a beautiful smile, and it always brightens my day. Even if its people I'm not attracted to. (its usually girls or older men and women who tell me if they are random strangers). Is it different for guys? Like if I were to tell the guy at the cash register or something "hey you're pretty cute" or "You have really nice eyes" as I paid for something. I feel like no matter who tells you, I feel like its a confidence booster because SOMEONE recognized a nice quality you have and went out of their way to tell you. I don't know though. Sure, it's nice if said in the right way in the right context. I don't like being recognized for my physical features by men I don't know - sometimes it's mildly flattering, often it felt creepy/made me anxious. I don't think it's a great way to start a conversation with someone if you are generally looking for something serious - I think people prefer to be recognized for their inner qualities especially if you want to start a conversation with the person and get to know the person (as opposed to what the person looks like). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachopin77 Posted March 24, 2013 Share Posted March 24, 2013 I guess it's mostly if it's something that is innocent or not at all sexual. If someone compliments your smile or eyes or innocently tells you that your dress is nice, its different then if someone goes up behind you and is like "Ayyy babe lemme hop on dat". If a guy that I found attractive came up to me and told me I had a pretty smile, that would be great. But in that situation, there wouldn't really be anything else for the guy to notice other than your outer qualities. It'd be what made him approach in the first place. But it's not offensive because that isn't leering at or treating you like a piece of meat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stay_home Posted March 24, 2013 Share Posted March 24, 2013 What do you think of women approaching men? 1. Women have you ever approached a man/would you? 2. Men, how would you feel if a woman approached you(if a random girl came up and said she thought you were attractive) I am just totally wondering because today I sat at school and looked over at a cute boy and i had so much temptation to go up and tell him he's cute then run away. Lol of course though, I am too chicken and fear rejection. So, I just observed from far away. however, after, I felt like would if I missed a possible chance? Then, I came home and then research. A lot of mixed reviews on women approaching men. It shows women know what they want/strong and then Let a man be a man and be the hunter. Opinions? thank you. It happens sometimes. Sometimes I get approached and I'm always flattered by it. I think the idea of women approaching men (in my opinion) just gives a woman a better advantage of meeting someone right for her. Life is all about opportunities, risk and taking chances. And those who take the most calculated risks are the ones who end up with more opportunities. So I don't feel as if I'll ever understand the science behind women who don't approach. Whereas the women who do, generally have much more dating material then the woman waiting on you to approach her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted March 24, 2013 Share Posted March 24, 2013 I guess it's mostly if it's something that is innocent or not at all sexual. If someone compliments your smile or eyes or innocently tells you that your dress is nice, its different then if someone goes up behind you and is like "Ayyy babe lemme hop on dat". If a guy that I found attractive came up to me and told me I had a pretty smile, that would be great. But in that situation, there wouldn't really be anything else for the guy to notice other than your outer qualities. It'd be what made him approach in the first place. But it's not offensive because that isn't leering at or treating you like a piece of meat. Yes, it depends on what is said and how it's said. I personally would prefer no compliments about my physical features (maybe something about my shoes or an accessory although these days there's nothing to compliment!) - if the man wanted to get to know me then he could simply say "how are you doing today" and in that way perhaps learn something about "the inside" if I felt like sharing. A stranger complimenting my physical features triggers me to close up/distance a bit to make sure it's ok, while a sincere "hi" is a nice icebreaker. If the person had no interest in getting to know me and simply wanted me to know he liked one of my physical features I'd prefer he said nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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