Married 28 years and trying to understand wife's lesbian affair

[lukeb]

I do struggle with these concepts, the wife's new found feelings are creating a lot of hurt for the OP, and I'm not made out of stone and I know about heartbreak and loss. I actually don't know what it is like to have been in a 28 year relationship my last partner died a little more than a year ago after a 3.5 year relationship. It is not about cherry picking concepts that suit me, these situations can be evaluated on their own merits. Gay people do get married, especially 20, 30 or more years ago, it was basically the thing to do to conform, but even today they get married because they feel pressure to do so. This has merit and it applies here. I wish the OP and his family well in these difficult times.