whathappensnext Posted November 14, 2004 Share Posted November 14, 2004 yeah well how do you know someone esle will do the same thing to you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReadyorNot Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 yeah well how do you know someone esle will do the same thing to you? Twice in a row now... both guys were long term relationships.. not just like 6 months or something... I thought for sure I would be seeing my ex today.... I dont even really feel like we broke up.. I think he is just playing a game with me... cause the way he acted the two times I saw him since we "broke up"... He didnt call.. .I drove past his house with my friend on the way to her house and he is home... just watching tv... he probably doesnt have a care in the world for me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pyralis Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 Look ReadyorNot, you need to let go and forget about him. If he treats you badly and plays these awful games then the relationship is not worth it. It's not worth the pain and heartache. Let him go, but don't close the doors either, just because you've had bad experiences in the past doesn't mean that your next relationship will turn out to be the same. There are a lot of good guys out there. Don't shut them out of your life because you've had a couple bad relationships. I know what you are probably going to say. "Easier said than done." I know, it's not easy. It's never easy to forget about someone you've fallen for, but if you think about it, it makes sense. Try your hardest to forget about him and move on, there is someone out there that will treat you with all of the love and respect you deserve, you just haven't found him yet. But remember, if you close the doors to other guys, you never will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReadyorNot Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 I feel like I am just pissing off people on enotalone.... I feel like I should completely stop posting my problems... its like I am a bother and I am making people mad... Im a bother to everyone..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pyralis Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 I feel like I am just pissing off people on enotalone.... I feel like I should completely stop posting my problems... its like I am a bother and I am making people mad... Im a bother to everyone..... That's not true, ReadyorNot. I'm just trying to help. You have every right to come to eNotAlone and ask for advice. That's what eNotAlone is all about. You are welcome to post and you are most certainly not a bother to me or to anyone else here. If that were the case, then I'm sure no one would be trying to help, and it looks like you have a lot of people willing to spend their own free time to help you with your problem. I'm sorry if my previous post came accross like I was mad. I'm not. I just want to help, as does every one else responding to your posts. Please don't stop posting, please continue. You are very welcome here, ReadyorNot. You take care. Okay? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisisnotanexit Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 hey i'm sorry you feel this way i can relate to your mother situation. i know how that feels and it hurts real bad. it's a constant struggle for me, but i promise it's not the end of your WORLD. she may be throwing her life away, but it's not your life. i knwo it hurts, believe me i do, but one day youre not gonna have to live with it anymore and you're gonna have your own life. this is your life, not anyone else's. don't let her get to you. don't give up. and this boy situation. hun, you're so young. there are soo many fish in the sea. i'm so sorry these jerks have made you feel this way, but were at an age that a lot of us don't knwo what we want and a lot of guys are just losers. one day soon youre gonna meet someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated. dont assume there's no hope, because i know there is hope! death is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. dont you want to stick around and see what can happen? things are gonna happen for you and you're gonna see just how good life can really be soemtimes. you've got so much to live for, don't forget that. i know it doesnt seem like it now, but your life isn't ALWAYS going to be this way. i know you think it is, but theres honestly no way you can know that without a time machine. please stick around and continue to be the strong person i know you are. i really admire your strength and applaud you. please remember youre not alone and if you ever wanna talk to me or anyone on here, please do. were here for you no matter what. youre gonna get through this. i'm not the only one who can beat suicide. and i'm very sorry about your dad too. loss is very difficult. i'm sure your dad would love to know his daughter was still alive and making it..make him proud by sticking around and learning and growing up the wonderful person you are. you can do so much, please just do not kill yourself, because you're worth it i promise! trust me..msg me if you ever need to and please check out these sites..take care link removed link removed or call 1-800-SUICIDE take care! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisisnotanexit Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 oh yes, and please, i cant emphasize enough..if you dont want to tak to one of us more, please talk to SOMEONE. anyone. a friend a family member, teacher, cousin, boyfriend, whoever..it works wonders! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finnerss Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 Readyornot, we're all here for you, even me, and I'm an absolute newbie, but as I said in another one of my posts, I have found so many great people in here and just by reading their posts I can realize how great they are, and that goes for you too. I applaud you too, and maybe you underestimate yourself a little bit, you seem to be more than smart and strong, and please keep on posting, when a topic or a person is a bother you know what people do? they just don't reply, and you've received so many replies in here for one reason : We care about you! You sound really great and would love to talk to you even through MSN. One more thing, there's something that you might want to consider carefully, the only reason that your BF is acting in a similar way to the last one, or at least with some similar things, is maybe because you haven't set out a time for yourself, you said that you've lost your friends in order to spend more time with him. A suggestion, try getting back to some of your friends, even acknowledging that you should not have turn them away. Everyone can appreciate when someone's done a mistake, maybe not even a mistake, but just strayed further than he or she should, you might find your friends opening their arms to you, and those that don't, well, you are entitled to find new better friends. I can tell you, there are people like myself who can appreciate when someone's had a tough life and admire it, but it's very hard to find someone who can admire someone who feels like history's going to repeat itself only in the wrong way, what about the good things? have you thought about that for people who are yet to appear in your life? Great moments can become yours again, and even better, and if you take your focus away from the wrong things, you will find your history changing for the best. One more thing that might be hard to think, but it might be worthwhile, how about thinking on a brand new start? moving away... IF you might have considered suicide, well, that's a radical change, a permanent one, why not giving another radical change a chance? like moving away and starting from scratch, but this time, knowing that bad things happen and you can make them good. A total change might be good, if you consider moving even to Mexico, well you'll have a friend to start with meaning me. You sound smart, so I'm sure you could find something great for yourself anywhere you might want, sometimes you just have to take a tough decision and make a radical change. Having considered ending everything, I guess moving out isn't such a radical change and will definitely have a better outcome than just ending it. Hope to read more from you and even talk to you through MSN or PM. Best wishes Sergio Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReadyorNot Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 Hi, Thank you for your post. I have just been through an insane night... this doesnt include the bf at all... I came home from work.. FEARING that my mother would be drunk... I pulled in the driveway and she is staggering around the driveway to get the dog in... The dog KNOWS when she is drunk and hides in the backyard or takes off if given the chance... I told my mom to get in the house and as she is trying to open the door and get in, she lets the BLACK cat zip out the door... I spent 20 minutes crawling around on the wet dirty ground trying to get him out from under the car.. >I finally do and I go in the house and my mother is freaking out saying that I am a horrible child.. a piece of crap and she wants me out... So I go to my room and then I decided to go downstairs will all the animals and I called the dog who was hiding.. as she walked by my mom kicked her as hard as she could... so I went and gave my mom a cuff in the head and said to never kick my dog again..She got up and grabbed me and dug her nails beneath my skin and hit me back in the head twice... Everything escaladed from there... I would tell you the whole story but its long... I tried to hide out in the basement all nigh but she just kept screaming to get out and that she never wanted to see me again. You have no idea how much I want to move.. not out of this city.. out of this house.. when I was younger and all this drunk stuff happened (she use to come after me and beat the crap out of me 3 years ago) I didnt want to leave because this was the house I have only ever known and my dad lived here.. but now I cant wait to get out.. NONE of you have any idea how my life will be when i move out of here.. it will just begin... Right now, I cant put certain things in the garbage.. she checks everything... I cant be on the computer too long... I cant be out with friends for too long.. I am being controlled... It will be amazing to be able to put something in the garbage without anyone snooping through it.. WOW My problem is I do not have any money.. any money I do make is going for car payments and my visa bill since my bf and I went to Florida in the summer. When I work for the government (6months out of the year) I make great money, but right now I just have a cashier job and I am in overdraft.... Im still shaken up after last night... I have to go relax Thanks, Talk to you soon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisisnotanexit Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 i am so sorry you may not believe me, i do go through similar things with my own mother..it's gotten worse recently. i feel your pain and i feel your same deseire to move. i know its going to happen one day i just have to save money like you. we can do it. you can get through this. i'm so glad you're planning for the future and realizing you can get out of this one day instead of thinking you'llb e this way the rest of your life. if you ever want to talk about this, please msg me. we can get through this i know it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReadyorNot Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 i am so sorry you may not believe me, i do go through similar things with my own mother..it's gotten worse recently. i feel your pain and i feel your same deseire to move. i know its going to happen one day i just have to save money like you. we can do it. you can get through this. i'm so glad you're planning for the future and realizing you can get out of this one day instead of thinking you'llb e this way the rest of your life. if you ever want to talk about this, please msg me. we can get through this i know it. This all started in 1997... and in 1999 the neighbours even called the cops... they could hear us... I had JUST gone threw a breakup with a bf I had been with for almost 4 years and I wouldnt tell herwe broke up.. so he called and she wanted to talk to him.. I was just trying to protect the phone and she ripped it out of my ear and pushed me down and I was up against my bed and she stood there kicking my head in with her foot... I STILL get sharp pains on my left side of my head and I know its from that night. The cops came and I had the option to charge her, but I didnt want to do that. Things calmed down for a bit and then when I met my bf it got worse... you have no idea how many times he would drop me off, and then I would call him 10 min later to come back and get me.. he woudl walk in the house and she would be on top of me in the living room just beating the crap out of me. He couldnt even get her off of me.. he is small but very strong... Finally when my bf had to go babysit his mothers house I went with him... I just packed up and left for 1.5 months and never even spoke to my mom. I came to pick up new clothes once I believe. After that she got better.... then she got bad again and better and then bad... Now she is getting drunk once a week and she does verbally harass me still its been since 2001 since she has actually come after me. I use to leave to go to my bfs.... but as you all know we arent on the best of terms.. and I felt like I needed to take care of the animals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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