Why do women like a man who takes charge?

[Seraphim]

This is more of the context I was personally referring to although I'm interested to hear everyone's take on it on what it might mean to them. So in the context of the quote above, what I'm curious about is there an aspect to it such as if the plans go awry or don't turn out as expected in some way then you don't have to take responsibility for it. You can just tell yourself it's not your fault. I know that sounds silly, but I posed the question because I was wondering it there were any cases where it was true for anyone.

 

Doesn't necessarily have to be in that context though, all the different replies so far have been very interesting.

 

Most things I chalk up to unforeseen events unless I know for certain he has donkeyed something up. I don't think people should be excused for messing up if that is what they truly did. In same vein I don't just say, " hey you were in charge of x,w,y,z and it is a dog's breakfast and YOU are at fault.

[pippy longstocking]

oh we all play the blame game under stress ...no matter who made the plans or took the lead ..

 

its par for the course and usually nothing more than a frustrated blow out of "well you made the plans nob face"

 

I don't know anyone who seriously conducts their life likethis , or sits back purposefuly to let their SO make the plans

then take the blame .

[deejay74]

I'll limit this to one specific scenario--dating.

 

From my own experience, you set yourself well apart from other men by taking control of making plans for a date. A lot of men are very meek and wishy washy when it comes to this and are too focused on approval-seeking behavior. "Well, uh, what would you like to do? What day works best for you? What time will you be ready to go out?" All of this means you're making the woman work just to set a date, instead of simply saying "I'll pick you up Friday at 7:00--have an appetite!"

 

I would agree to this too.

 

I used to be the type that always said "I don't know, what do you want to do?" years ago and it never got me that far. I have a friend that still does this and he's not very successful with women.

 

Now, I do what camus said. When I start dating someone, I always have a plan for the first, and sometimes second date. I know exactly where we're going and when. But, after a couple of dates I let the woman choose because I don't want to come accross controlling.

[EQIQ]

A lot of the things we find attractive don't really have much modern-day relevance. For example, you hear all the time that most women prefer taller guys, strong guys, etc. If we were still living in caves this might have a practical implication, but most of these features have very little practical application these days. At least in developed nations.

 

You are forgetting the "open the jar of olives test". Need strength for that lol

[IAmFCA]

A lot of the things we find attractive don't really have much modern-day relevance. For example, you hear all the time that most women prefer taller guys, strong guys, etc. If we were still living in caves this might have a practical implication, but most of these features have very little practical application these days. At least in developed nations.

 

Different topic: What is attractive in a man? Being tall and strong is distinct from "taking charge", and taking charge still has modern-day relevance. Can I earn my way and safely go about my business? Yes. Do I still appreciate a partner who can take charge? Yes. Are there times when I take charge as a woman? Yes.

[In the Dark]

Nothing to do with blaming in my experience.

More to do with giving the impression of masculinity.

To be able to speak up and have an opinion on matters rather than be the type which goes, 'I don't know....what do you want to do?'

 

Lets face it, no one likes a confrontation of any sort with a stranger and the man is expected to be able to have a spine in such situations.

This is forced fed into peoples psyche by movies as well which many of us tend to subconsciously abide by.

 

Taking charge shows spine and shows masculinity.

Some guys do not like seeing that in a woman and expect them to stay in the kitchen while some prefer to sit back and relax or have equal ground with some debate.

 

Different topic: What is attractive in a man? Being tall and strong is distinct from "taking charge", and taking charge still has modern-day relevance. Can I earn my way and safely go about my business? Yes. Do I still appreciate a partner who can take charge? Yes. Are there times when I take charge as a woman? Yes.

 

Physical appearance 'tall strong' still goes a long way in the assumption of what things which are unknown could most likely be behind a person and is used as a 'safe bet' still regardless of who the male may actually be.

Sometimes lessons learned, sometimes the want is hard to break away from.

[Weeb]

Honsetly, most of the time I just hate making decisions (at least the kind where I'm deciding for someone else as well). I rarely say no to someone else's suggestion so it just makes it so much easier.

 

It's also more of a masculine thing to do.

[acfan]

Just speaking from my experience in dating I have had the criticism like "God,that movie was terrible" and complaing about the resteraunt. So, I would set up the date (which is a lot of work) but, if I get complaints I am not going on another date with her. As far as going out with groups of friends I would not dare to suggest a place because of criticisms. I have to say I don't go out much anymore except by myself, I have yet to complain about where I take myself. I think whatever works for the couple is great I just have yet to find it for me.