mymelancholysoul Posted October 16, 2004 Share Posted October 16, 2004 She said she would never leave She said she would never go She said I was safe beside her She said I was better off alone She said I would win the fight She never mentioned what It would cost But then again, It was only my life I gave her my soul on a silver platter And sealed it with a crimson flow I sat alone on a white tilled floor Waiting for her to hold me close She never came to my home She never held me close She never mentioned what it would cost But then again, It was only my life Her promises came and went Much like the many years Each passing day brought little hope Each night brought bright red screaming In the midsts of all my anger Through the shadows of all my tears Her voice would ring out on high And say we were in the clear She never mentioned how much it would cost But then again, It was only my life She lied to me and I to her We gave our word of secrecy She said she would never betray me I swore to never admit the pain But to keep this all inside To pretend and fade away Did more to me than she will ever know Sometimes she was good Other times she was bad The only thing that stayed for certain was She never mentioned how much it would cost So yeah, its not my best work....and I hope not my worst lol. I am still working on the title and maybe even the wording...Enjoy or not, its all up to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elveden Posted October 16, 2004 Share Posted October 16, 2004 It's exellent!? I'm impressed with that.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForAnother Posted October 16, 2004 Share Posted October 16, 2004 I agree not your best. Your past one was amazing... I enjoyed this one too... some good stuff. You use crimson I am seeing in your writing quite a bit. Variety perhaps? Still liked the ideas put down. Perhaps look for your stronger ideas and condense it? All in all, I really enjoy your style of writing. It just feels good to read. Get another one out there, I really enjoy reading your stuff. ForAnother Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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