Seraphim Posted October 11 Share Posted October 11 9 minutes ago, itsallgrand said: Thank you, Thanksgiving is a big deal to me, it's almost been one of my favorites. It was cool too because he didn't celebrate these holidays a lot during a lot of his adult years, and he really embraced them when we were together. His pumpkin pie! His big huge yard display for the kids on Halloween. He was the best and it's going to be hard not having him at the table and not coming up behind me to hug me as I cook! Bask in your wonderful memories if you can . It is hard and beautiful at the same time . Last year some time my son started laughing about memories of his dear papa. ( my step dad who was in my son’s life from day one . They adored each other ) I knew then he was starting to heal because he could laugh about his fun memories. One day and in your own time you will get there . Much love . 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted October 11 Share Posted October 11 11 minutes ago, Seraphim said: Bask in your wonderful memories if you can . It is hard and beautiful at the same time . Last year some time my son started laughing about memories of his dear papa. ( my step dad who was in my son’s life from day one . They adored each other ) I knew then he was starting to heal because he could laugh about his fun memories. One day and in your own time you will get there . Much love . I agree. And also send love and support. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted October 11 Author Share Posted October 11 1 hour ago, Seraphim said: Bask in your wonderful memories if you can . It is hard and beautiful at the same time . Last year some time my son started laughing about memories of his dear papa. ( my step dad who was in my son’s life from day one . They adored each other ) I knew then he was starting to heal because he could laugh about his fun memories. One day and in your own time you will get there . Much love . I'm glad for your son. 💗 I hope you all have a really nice Thanksgiving together this year. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShySoul Posted October 12 Share Posted October 12 I had a niece who passed away at age five on Dec 1st. She had a brain tumor so they knew this was coming for over a year and she survived longer then expected. But she took a turn for the worse before Thanksgiving that year and my brother and his family spent the holiday preparing for the worse. I know they stopped celebrating Thanksgiving after that. Holidays are hard to get through. It's difficult to have to put on a smile and be joyful and in the spirit when you don't feel it inside, when a big part of what made it special is not there. Do what you feel up to, but don't force it. Celebrate if you want, or don't. This time is all about you. So do what you have the energy for and what you feel good about doing. Very few things are going to be so pivotal that you must get it done. Anything else can wait, if you even want to do it at all. Have some pumpkin pie in his honor. Hang in there. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted October 12 Author Share Posted October 12 11 hours ago, ShySoul said: I had a niece who passed away at age five on Dec 1st. She had a brain tumor so they knew this was coming for over a year and she survived longer then expected. But she took a turn for the worse before Thanksgiving that year and my brother and his family spent the holiday preparing for the worse. I know they stopped celebrating Thanksgiving after that. Holidays are hard to get through. It's difficult to have to put on a smile and be joyful and in the spirit when you don't feel it inside, when a big part of what made it special is not there. Do what you feel up to, but don't force it. Celebrate if you want, or don't. This time is all about you. So do what you have the energy for and what you feel good about doing. Very few things are going to be so pivotal that you must get it done. Anything else can wait, if you even want to do it at all. Have some pumpkin pie in his honor. Hang in there. I'm so sorry about your niece. That is so terrible, it's not fair that a child ever has to go through that. In some way or form I will give my thanks. One of the things I love so much about Thanksgiving, at least how I've known it, is that it is centered on taking a pause to be grateful. Grateful for the harvest, grateful for the good things, grateful for people, grateful for anything! I have a lot I am grateful for even right now. Besides all the other things I could list, I'm grateful I had him in my life. It hurts so badly because it was so amazing. You know on movies and TV, where they show stories of big love that people weep at because they've dreamed about having something like that? We had that, truly couldn't make up a story that wouldn't look like a pallid comparison to the real deal when two people really love each other through thick n thin. I really appreciate the support. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShySoul Posted October 12 Share Posted October 12 4 hours ago, itsallgrand said: I'm so sorry about your niece. That is so terrible, it's not fair that a child ever has to go through that. In some way or form I will give my thanks. One of the things I love so much about Thanksgiving, at least how I've known it, is that it is centered on taking a pause to be grateful. Grateful for the harvest, grateful for the good things, grateful for people, grateful for anything! I have a lot I am grateful for even right now. Besides all the other things I could list, I'm grateful I had him in my life. It hurts so badly because it was so amazing. You know on movies and TV, where they show stories of big love that people weep at because they've dreamed about having something like that? We had that, truly couldn't make up a story that wouldn't look like a pallid comparison to the real deal when two people really love each other through thick n thin. I really appreciate the support. Thank you. She was the sweetest child. I like to think she was too sweet for this world and that she went to a better place because whatever higher force is out there knew so. We only got to have her around for a short time, but we were lucky to have her. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday as well. It's not centered around a lot of material things, more about appreciating all we are lucky enough to have. Hoping I can find that kind of love one day. I know when I do I'll be grateful for it everyday and try not to take one second for granted. I'm happy you were able to find it. Having it in your life is a special and blessed thing. Keep the faith. You'll make it. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted October 16 Author Share Posted October 16 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted Thursday at 10:52 PM Author Share Posted Thursday at 10:52 PM I've always loved this song, and I love this tribute cover. My sweetie liked to tease me about liking "cheese" metal and rock. It's a small part of what I like, but, it's comfort listening to me, including all the iterations and covers. It's helping me get bite sized pieces of work done, as the sadness is like a weight on me and I have to motivate myself in little ways. And reward myself for even small things. You do what you have to do sometimes! We have a shared love of a diverse range of music, though he was infinitely more talented than me musically. He had many creative gifts. There's a music room in our house bulging at the seams with instruments and equipment, and he could play it all. His music got sweeter and lighter in his 40s, just beautiful stuff. There's unfinished songs here that he was working on, he was always working on something. I'm working on a version of one of his songs. We did mixes together a lot, with him doing the heavy lifting! But he always praised my singing and my music, and he got the googly eyes when we sang together, and it did make me feel seen and special. Everywhere I see and hear and feel him. I'm just doing my best but truth is I feel very lost. One step at a time. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted Thursday at 10:58 PM Share Posted Thursday at 10:58 PM 5 minutes ago, itsallgrand said: I've always loved this song, and I love this tribute cover. My sweetie liked to tease me about liking "cheese" metal and rock. It's a small part of what I like, but, it's comfort listening to me, including all the iterations and covers. It's helping me get bite sized pieces of work done, as the sadness is like a weight on me and I have to motivate myself in little ways. And reward myself for even small things. You do what you have to do sometimes! We have a shared love of a diverse range of music, though he was infinitely more talented than me musically. He had many creative gifts. There's a music room in our house bulging at the seams with instruments and equipment, and he could play it all. His music got sweeter and lighter in his 40s, just beautiful stuff. There's unfinished songs here that he was working on, he was always working on something. I'm working on a version of one of his songs. We did mixes together a lot, with him doing the heavy lifting! But he always praised my singing and my music, and he got the googly eyes when we sang together, and it did make me feel seen and special. Everywhere I see and hear and feel him. I'm just doing my best but truth is I feel very lost. One step at a time. Especially given his artistic and musical talents I bet you do! I love that you performed together whether in private or otherwise.I'm glad the music helps. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted Thursday at 11:16 PM Author Share Posted Thursday at 11:16 PM 16 minutes ago, Batya33 said: Especially given his artistic and musical talents I bet you do! I love that you performed together whether in private or otherwise.I'm glad the music helps. Mostly private but a few times publicly. And I never would have without him. I did some singing when I was young, and then just hanging out with people jamming and I'd sing. But with him was my first time in front of a crowd. Nothing serious, but absolutely fun. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted Thursday at 11:25 PM Share Posted Thursday at 11:25 PM 8 minutes ago, itsallgrand said: Mostly private but a few times publicly. And I never would have without him. I did some singing when I was young, and then just hanging out with people jamming and I'd sing. But with him was my first time in front of a crowd. Nothing serious, but absolutely fun. My older sister is a singer and now does some jamming and lots of karaoke. She performed publicly in her teens and 20s. I can't sing. My husband and son can! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted Friday at 11:50 AM Share Posted Friday at 11:50 AM 12 hours ago, itsallgrand said: I've always loved this song, and I love this tribute cover. My sweetie liked to tease me about liking "cheese" metal and rock. It's a small part of what I like, but, it's comfort listening to me, including all the iterations and covers. It's helping me get bite sized pieces of work done, as the sadness is like a weight on me and I have to motivate myself in little ways. And reward myself for even small things. You do what you have to do sometimes! We have a shared love of a diverse range of music, though he was infinitely more talented than me musically. He had many creative gifts. There's a music room in our house bulging at the seams with instruments and equipment, and he could play it all. His music got sweeter and lighter in his 40s, just beautiful stuff. There's unfinished songs here that he was working on, he was always working on something. I'm working on a version of one of his songs. We did mixes together a lot, with him doing the heavy lifting! But he always praised my singing and my music, and he got the googly eyes when we sang together, and it did make me feel seen and special. Everywhere I see and hear and feel him. I'm just doing my best but truth is I feel very lost. One step at a time. I love the sweet romance of your post . A deep and true love of creating and for each other . That is so special in the world . It also speaks of your deep bond with each other . ❤️Store all these wonderful things in your heart and mind . 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShySoul Posted Friday at 09:55 PM Share Posted Friday at 09:55 PM My uncle who passed away a few months ago loved music. He self taught himself (let me find the obituary to make sure I get this right): piano, guitar, violin, bagpipes, accordian, trombone, recorder, concertina. He also built and taught himself to play a harp. He was also a song writer and singer. I can't sing or play a thing. So I'll leave up to all you more musically inclined individuals to do it for me. I'll be in the audience applauding. Music has helped me through my worse times. Glad it can help you in yours. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted Friday at 10:18 PM Author Share Posted Friday at 10:18 PM 21 minutes ago, ShySoul said: My uncle who passed away a few months ago loved music. He self taught himself (let me find the obituary to make sure I get this right): piano, guitar, violin, bagpipes, accordian, trombone, recorder, concertina. He also built and taught himself to play a harp. He was also a song writer and singer. I can't sing or play a thing. So I'll leave up to all you more musically inclined individuals to do it for me. I'll be in the audience applauding. Music has helped me through my worse times. Glad it can help you in yours. Wow that is impressive. Such a huge loss to the world. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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