behind_these_eyes Posted October 4, 2004 Share Posted October 4, 2004 Home sick today so I wrote a poem to cope with the agonizing bordom. Hope everyone likes it, any feedback is appreciated though. I dug myself a hole and laid down to await A voice I hoped to hear- a fictitious escape. I glanced down at my watch, and wondered where you were, Assumed you were just late.. But soon I wasn't sure. I heard your loud footsteps And my heart skipped a beat. I knew I'd soon be saved; I'd heard my hero's feet. I tried hard not to smile- ironic, on my deathbed. But as I gained my hope, Something hit my head. "Must be a rope," I thought; Something to pull me out, But suddenly all of my hope had transformed into doubt. I felt the grainy substance. The powder framed in hate. My smile at that point was slain. I surrendered, now stone-faced. The shovel struck the dirt, Ushered it on to me, And showered me with death Until you had me buried. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sisterlynch Posted October 4, 2004 Share Posted October 4, 2004 I love that idea of love showering you with hate, that is excellent. You are a very good poet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Protex Posted October 4, 2004 Share Posted October 4, 2004 Very, very, very, very well written. Actually made me read it over again and again, very few poems can make me do that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_hate_the_world47 Posted October 5, 2004 Share Posted October 5, 2004 Wonderful poem.Bravo.I loved it so much. ~meagan~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gauchori Posted October 5, 2004 Share Posted October 5, 2004 lol I just like to say that its was very good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
under_the_pressure Posted October 6, 2004 Share Posted October 6, 2004 Awesome! I loved it. But I'm also pretty twisted...I absolutely LOVE IT!!! Great GREAT job!! under* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts