Protex Posted September 28, 2004 Share Posted September 28, 2004 Dagger Thrust, harder drive the dagger into my heart the dagger that makes me bleed the dagger that makes me love you Plunge deeper into my chest feel my breaths deepen feel my body cringe from the dagger that makes me love you Stare into my eyes eyes filled with passion a passion for you. You and your dagger, the dagger that makes me love you. Discern my pain, baby, feel what I feel. Stare as I take the dagger the dagger that makes me love you With your weapon in my hands will you let me change your mind? Be ready love, to feel what I feel cry the tears I've cried bleed the blood I've bled and love me as I have loved you This is the dagger that will make you love me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bilal72401 Posted September 28, 2004 Share Posted September 28, 2004 good job nice poem!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
behind_these_eyes Posted September 28, 2004 Share Posted September 28, 2004 That was really awesome. Nice job Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
under_the_pressure Posted September 28, 2004 Share Posted September 28, 2004 Awesome poem. I really like the repitition in it and the last line how it's changed around; This is the dagger that will make you love me.Bravo. uner* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_hate_the_world47 Posted September 28, 2004 Share Posted September 28, 2004 Brave.I loved that poem.I think it may be one of the best i have read in awhile. ~Meagan~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Protex Posted September 28, 2004 Author Share Posted September 28, 2004 Thank you all so very much, you guys give me motivation to write. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flightlessguitar Posted September 28, 2004 Share Posted September 28, 2004 hey i like this poem a lot. just to help u tho. poems are made to b read as u no. since this is the case i think that it might help u a lot if u didnt use the word dagger so often. i usually like it when some poems say "it" until the very last line or stanza where they tell u wut they were talkin about a long. Very nice poem tho. thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Protex Posted September 28, 2004 Author Share Posted September 28, 2004 I use repetition of the word to build up to the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts