delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Yea I have been way too submissive - I also feel as if though she has had the upper hand seeing as though I subcontracted for her (I would contact her; she wouldn't respond; 3 days later she would contact me about the business and I felt obligated to answer for I am a professional! Keep in mind that I am not delusional - I realize that she is not really into me! But there has been some interest on her part: she suggested that we go to the movies next week! I just felt mislead (like her backup plan and that is why I asked her if she was into me). Besides, once when we had dinner she told me that if she wasn't into a guy, she would just tell him (instead of wasting his time). Just words I suppose! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calichick007 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Besides, once when we had dinner she told me that if she wasn't into a guy, she would just tell him (instead of wasting his time). Just words I suppose! She also started out this whole thing lying to you about being sick to get out of a date. Not sure why you'd believe her about anything else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Well after I sent her that text, I probably scared her off completely! I feel content about sending her that text though because I wanted clarification; I know what I want and I went for it! If she isn't into me (I think there is some interest on her part) then it isn't meant to be and I'll move on! And it is not like I sent her that text after our first date; I have known her for three months - she could at least be honest with me! And I feel like my value increased after I sent her that text because I basically told her that if she isn't into me, I'll just move on! And that is how I feel - I don't want to waste my time!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
motley802 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Why do guys always like the girls that treat them badly?! Sometimes its thrill of chase. Men are the ones who do chasing initially. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calichick007 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 She probably doesn't believe you'll move on. Not trying to be harsh, but a man who valued/respected himself would have moved on looooooong ago. Like months. She knows that, trust me. Please do not contact her again about this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 The irony here is that I wanted clarification and for her to just be honest and open with me, and what did she do instead? She ignored my message which would have allowed her to just be honest with me! Lol she had her chance to say, hey, let's just b friends - you are too good for me - yadda yadda yadda. Most people would respond after having known each other for three months! Instead she avoided my text, which has made it even more awkward! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 I do think you are delusional at this point. You really need to move on and stop communicating for any personal reasons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
motley802 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 The irony here is that I wanted clarification and for her to just be honest and open with me, and what did she do instead? She ignored my message which would have allowed her to just be honest with me! Lol she had her chance to say, hey, let's just b friends - you are too good for me - yadda yadda yadda. Most people would respond after having known each other for three months! Instead she avoided my text, which has made it even more awkward! And there is your answer! She is not that into you and wants to avoid awkward conversation since you guys are doing project together. And to be frank these types of conversations are better in person rather than over texts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laura40 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 I haven't read any other posts apart from the first page, so I apologise if I've missed any updates. From your first post I don't think she's interested. If she was interested she'd be texting you and not flaking on you. It sounds like she is taking you for granted. Drop the contact and I bet she'll come running, however it doesn't mean you should take her back! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Cali - yea, I am not going to bring up the issue again! I just need to get paid next week and that's it! I may send her this after I get paid - "I guess I have my answer! Wish you showed consideration to be straight up with me! Take care!" But I think that is unnecessary! I would just be feeding het ego! I get paid, I should just walk away! If she isnt into me, she should just leave me alone from here on after. I almost feel like asking her to mail me the check instead of meeting her in person! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dubb Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 She probably doesn't believe you'll move on. Not trying to be harsh, but a man who valued/respected himself would have moved on looooooong ago. Like months. She knows that, trust me. Please do not contact her again about this. karma.. she will get hers just like anyone else who plays games... Average girls play games. sexy and awesome girls don't. Us guys prefer sexy and awesome.. trust me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Well, motley, we are basically done with the project. She suggested we go to the movies next week! Lol anyways, I am going to back off - I just wish she would have said she wasn't into me when I asked her about it! Oh well! Thanks guys! I just need some space from the situation, and I'll do fine! this is part of life and it does make me feel very alive! I'll treat it as a learning experience! I doubt we'll ever go out again! And Darcy, I really agree with what you said about being submissive - and that is not my style usually! Oh well, it's just life! You have to experience this stuff to get a greater perspective! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Hey dubb - I like that comment! I am on my phone posting and for some reason, it is not allowing me to view pms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 I think you need to stop talking to her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Darcy - if she isn't into me, then that is what will inevitably happen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Darcy - if she isn't into me, then that is what will inevitably happen! This is a delusional sentence. She's not into you and she's still talking to you. You need to stop talking to her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Nah I think she is going to back off after this! And that is fine - if she likes somebody else then they are meant to be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laura40 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Just read the whole thread. I don't want to be harsh with you but please stop saying you're gonna get over her and just do it!!!! Actions speak louder than words! Good luck dude! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laura40 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Also to add - it's so obvious she's just playing you along. You're her back-up guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Nah I think she is going to back off after this! And that is fine - if she likes somebody else then they are meant to be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 Laura - that's why I sent her that text! I don't want to be her backup! I just wanted her to tell me and that way i could peacefully move on! She chose to ignore it, for whatever reason. When we have been out and about, and another girl shows interest in me, she gets jealous! It's like she is into me more when other girls like me!! 3-4 examples of this that I could bring up!!! And I sincerely think that this is it; I'll get my check and that'll be the end of it! And if that's how she wants to handle the situation, so be it!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laura40 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 She wants her cake and to eat it too. She wants you to be all hers (but doesn't want to date you) but she doesn't want another girl having you. Classic example of using someone as a back-up. I didn't intend to be harsh or patronising in my last post so I apologise if it came accross that way. If you're going to text her now then please just let it be about the money. Once you've got your money cut all contact. Endless texting asking whether she likes you or not is not going to get you anywhere. It'll probably upset you more. Just take her silence as your answer that she's not interested and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 12, 2011 Author Share Posted December 12, 2011 Laura - you're right - I am very frustrated with the whole situation! I feel as if though she could have shown me the consideration and told me directly how she felt after 3 months of lnowing one another. And she has been leading me on, which is why this has been going on! There is no excuse for me continuing pursuing her. I just got emotionally invested (and it sucks). We're both adults and I was simply hoping for clarification - I go after what I want in life, but now I just feel like never, ever asking her out again (cause all she does is say no). Then she somehow manages to crash into my life again giving me false hope! What is she thinking when she classified me as her backup plan? Why would she be interested in someone else (and yet keep me as her backup plan). Obviously she doesn't value me enough to even text me back, so why would I be good enough as a backup plan? Either she is going to take a hint, and ignore me from here on after, or she is going to start pursuing me when she realizes that I am backing off! What do you think of the text I sent her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
motley802 Posted December 12, 2011 Share Posted December 12, 2011 Delancey, buddy everyone is giving sound advice here. Forget her completely (apart from getting that money). Let her chase you and if she comes back to you then don't go with open arms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delancey Posted December 12, 2011 Author Share Posted December 12, 2011 Thanks all! I appreciate your advice! I just need to move on, so hopefully she just pays me and leaves me alone! If she isn't going to answer my text directly, she should just stop contacting me - that would be the cool thing to do! Thanks All! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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