lonelyheart2 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 also isn't it sometimes helpful, especially with long distance break ups to become friendly in some way? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 8, 2011 Author Share Posted November 8, 2011 And we're now shuffling with breadcrumbs..... Lanaa - The law of attraction will see right through your methods. As someone else said earlier, it's clear to me you want to be his friend with the added bonus that he wants you then as his girlfriend again. You might be able to tell porkies to us but the universe will see right through that and you will get what you most fear. Don't say you weren't warned, several people in this thread have given really good advice but you chose to ignore it. Hehe,i have really no hopes that we can get back again any time soon as he in an other country.I want to keep in touch with him yes.We ended in a bad way,he said bad stuff to me i said bad stuff to him so i wanted to show him i am not angry anymore ,i am over that part,,its past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
butterflyburn Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Yeah right Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
butterflyburn Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Hehe,i have really no hopes that we can get back again any time soon as he in an other country.I want to keep in touch with him yes.We ended in a bad way,he said bad stuff to me i said bad stuff to him so i wanted to show him i am not angry anymore ,i am over that part,,its past. I am not sure who you are lying to, us or yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyheart2 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 she is not lying to herself she is being honest. She knows it is unlikely that they will have a chance at reconciliation any time soon but I am sure she hopes for it to become a possibility in the future like many of us do Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanzi Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Hehe,i have really no hopes that we can get back again any time soon as he in an other country.I want to keep in touch with him yes.We ended in a bad way,he said bad stuff to me i said bad stuff to him so i wanted to show him i am not angry anymore ,i am over that part,,its past. But in the future ...... ? If you are hoping that you may get back together at some point in the future then you will be making him your focus for some time to come. Thats not really healthy and not very helpful in the healing process. He knows you have got over your anger now. He knows he can reach out to you if he wants to. He has asked you a question so I think you should respond otherwise it will eat away at you if you don't but I don't think you should ask him any more questions. Don't try to prolong the contact. All these questions and just drawing things out slowly. If you don't encourage him to respond yet he still finds reasons to text you that is quite telling and worth more than to-ing and fro-ing with inane questions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 22, 2011 Author Share Posted November 22, 2011 Ok short update I did not ask him any questions but he continued being friendly.He said some stuff that maybe aren't just friendly? like him missing our late conversations,his mother asking about me(she and i never even met).But the thing that confuses me is he is joking a lot..and clearly tries to avoid the topic of our really bad breakup,the only thing he told me about it is "there is an other truth behind our breakup that he would want to tell me about" but he didn't want to do it yet :S Any opinions,what do you guys think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notopposed Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 Based on the responses you've been getting I'd be very cautious about proceeding. His original response was very neutral. He hasn't said anything about wanting to get back together yet. His secret may be that he met another girl. When people break No contact it kind of reminds me of what happens to people when they go gambling and start to lose money. They keep playing and playing with a hot head trying to win back their money as fast as they can. Most of the time these people flame out and lose more than they ever wanted to and wind up depressed. Right now you're hovering at that point. Wait for him to give you the green light or you might be running a red. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 22, 2011 Author Share Posted November 22, 2011 Based on the responses you've been getting I'd be very cautious about proceeding. His original response was very neutral. He hasn't said anything about wanting to get back together yet. His secret may be that he met another girl. When people break No contact it kind of reminds me of what happens to people when they go gambling and start to lose money. They keep playing and playing with a hot head trying to win back their money as fast as they can. Most of the time these people flame out and lose more than they ever wanted to and wind up depressed. Right now you're hovering at that point. Wait for him to give you the green light or you might be running a red. Well I know he met a girl that's the reason our breakup was bad.So he cant really say that right now its all just friendly nothing more,,he puts some comments that can be seen as "flirting" maybe,but i ignore them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magnoliatree Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 When people break No contact it kind of reminds me of what happens to people when they go gambling and start to lose money. They keep playing and playing with a hot head trying to win back their money as fast as they can. Most of the time these people flame out and lose more than they ever wanted to and wind up depressed. This is completely on point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 That new comment makes me think he's getting serious with the other girl. I'm not sure why you want to be in the picture. He's using you to get over you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 22, 2011 Author Share Posted November 22, 2011 That new comment makes me think he's getting serious with the other girl. I'm not sure why you want to be in the picture. He's using you to get over you. oh well maybe,your suggestion is i just stop responding?v and how do you connect his new comment with the girl? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyheart2 Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 have you responded to his 'joke' about meeting up yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 22, 2011 Author Share Posted November 22, 2011 have you responded to his 'joke' about meeting up yet? Yeah i responded back with a joke,i am keeping it light and neutral i forgot to mention that part i don't know how his new relationship possibly could go well and even serious ,if he is "half flirting" with me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 I think the question is, is he with another girl right now? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeepman41 Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 And we're now shuffling with breadcrumbs..... Lanaa - The law of attraction will see right through your methods. As someone else said earlier, it's clear to me you want to be his friend with the added bonus that he wants you then as his girlfriend again. You might be able to tell porkies to us but the universe will see right through that and you will get what you most fear. Don't say you weren't warned, several people in this thread have given really good advice but you chose to ignore it. The Law of Attraction states that like attracts like and you can manifest anything in life you want. In the matter of people there is also freewill involved. In you want to attract someone you must put the focus on yourself and Law of Attraction will influence others including your ex to want to be with you. But if you are obsessing and pining over someone the LOA sees through that and brings about what you most feared. Don't repel by obsessing, attract by influencing and becoming a better person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 23, 2011 Author Share Posted November 23, 2011 I think the question is, is he with another girl right now? I haven't asked yet,saw no reason as we only talk in a friendly way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nestorZ Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 I really don't like this. Yes, you're keeping it all friendly atm but you know that's not all you want. And with him living in another country, do you really think you can keep this up for who knows how long? And most importantly, why would you even do that? a) he gets a new girl and stops contacting you b) he strings you along while having someone else c) he doesn't have anyone new, but you're still thousands of miles apart for a long long time. Call me crazy, but none of these options look good and in every one you'll keep waiting for him and won't be making any progress. Dunno what you're gonna do, but I'm pretty sure you should stop contact to save yourself from future pain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 23, 2011 Author Share Posted November 23, 2011 nestorZ I understand what you are saying,But this long distance we have been doing before,and if you want it enough it is possible.So that is not an issue for us.We both come from traditional conservative families and eventually our relationship would lead to marriage if it workes out,so the distance wont be there for ever.both him and i will be in croatia after new year in the same town,so we would see eachother if there would be any will.but as it looks right now there is nothing more than "friendship" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nestorZ Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 I just don't want you to hurt yourself by playing this "friend" role when it's so obvious you want and need more. Btw, I'm Croatian so I want only the best for me people I hope you'll find out sooner rather then later if a relationship is possible/probable because I feel you're risking alot by being his friend. Good luck Lana Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted November 23, 2011 Author Share Posted November 23, 2011 Well of course and i know that,thats why i dont have any expecations.I havent asked him anything,i just replied,will se what happens now Hvala Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Lansing Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 I think that was a positive interaction, but leave it at that. He was happy to hear from you. But definitely don't follow up, other than maybe a "Thanks he hasn't asked you any questions. Aything beyond that would be kind of needy... You've laid the groundwork for a possible reconciliation down the road, but remember: it's out of your hands. He knows you don't hate him, so he won't be scared to contact you in the future. Thus, if he does ever start to regret the breakup, he will contact you. In the meantime, don't contact him. Continue moving on, and be grateful to know he doesn't hate you and that he knows you don't hate him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Lansing Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 Oops that last post of mine was written before I read your update. What I said still applies though. Leave him alone and let him contact you. If and when he does, be friendly but don't be his friend. You need to heal, and I don't think he'll come back unless and until you do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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