Oneironaut Posted September 16, 2011 Author Share Posted September 16, 2011 No, I think you misunderstood something I said earlier. I told him that I'd wanted to talk on Skype, and he said he wanted to wait and see how his computer went. Then, after I went to lie down with a headache, he started chatting with someone. When I asked him about that later, he said he'd have asked ME to chat on Skype, but I was lying down. No, his behavior has not changed at all. He still treats me well, and is still encourages me to talk about things that are bothering me. Thanks for posting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ariel85 Posted September 17, 2011 Share Posted September 17, 2011 This whole thing reminds me of the episode of The King of Queens, when Doug and Carrie ask each other who the one person is that they would give the other person a pass to sleep with - lol, and Carrie says something like Brad Pitt, and Doug says Carrie's nail girl. Then Carrie flips out because he picked someone real and viable. That's what would bum me out, O. I personally couldn't dismiss it that my BF just happened to admire pretty women. I'd be tweaked that he still had such a connection to someone from his past, and someone who had a mad crush on him, and someone whom he admits to enjoying the ego stroke of her attention from. THAT would worry me. But, you've talked it out, are happy, so all's good. BTW, I don't play video games, but after watching that clip, I think I should start! That game looked so fun. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted September 17, 2011 Share Posted September 17, 2011 No one is perfect. Anyone who thinks they are perfect are naive or has a very big head about themselves. While yes, it is a weird situation, it's also easy to forget sometimes we as humans simply just make mistakes we don't realize until someone points out how it is affecting others. I myself have done a thing or two that in ordinary circumstances wouldn't matter but that I didn't know until L said something that it had bothered him. I quickly changed what I was doing and never did it again. And vice versa. There's a quote by Bob Marley I go by: “The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oneironaut Posted September 17, 2011 Author Share Posted September 17, 2011 Ariel, yes, it's awesome fun if you're into RPGs. I've been playing it for over 4 years...in fact, I'm playing it right now, while I'm surfing the Net. OG, that's a fantastic quote, and very true. I like very much! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brownstone322 Posted September 17, 2011 Share Posted September 17, 2011 Heh...yeah, I learned a long time ago, the hard way at first, that posing a question on an Internet forum is going to open you up to a variety of responses. I'm used to this now, and did actually want a variety of ideas from different people to make sure it wasn't just me. That wasn't really my point. It was a matter of timing. I think you took the story public with almost no information, which didn't invite "ideas" or "advice," but wild speculation, which is rarely of any value. Now that we've heard his explanation, the story seems pretty benign. The most he can be accused of is being a bit callous and insensitive, and, trust me, guys are often guilty of that kinda thing, often through laziness. This thread, meanwhile, turned out to be alarmist and served no real purpose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greywolf Posted September 17, 2011 Share Posted September 17, 2011 This thread, meanwhile, turned out to be alarmist and served no real purpose. I wouldn't say that. Even if she didn't get useful advice as you said, it doesn't mean that there was no purpose. Maybe writing everything down helped her feel better. Maybe coming to ENA kept her from doing something she'd regret until she gathered more information. Maybe she needed validation for her feelings about the picture. There's plenty of reasons for posting a thread, and personally, I think it's nice to read stories that turn out good instead of all the bad things that we read on ENA all the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oneironaut Posted September 17, 2011 Author Share Posted September 17, 2011 That wasn't really my point. It was a matter of timing. I think you took the story public with almost no information, which didn't invite "ideas" or "advice," but wild speculation, which is rarely of any value. Now that we've heard his explanation, the story seems pretty benign. The most he can be accused of is being a bit callous and insensitive, and, trust me, guys are often guilty of that kinda thing, often through laziness. This thread, meanwhile, turned out to be alarmist and served no real purpose. I wouldn't say that. Even if she didn't get useful advice as you said, it doesn't mean that there was no purpose. Maybe writing everything down helped her feel better. Maybe coming to ENA kept her from doing something she'd regret until she gathered more information. Maybe she needed validation for her feelings about the picture. There's plenty of reasons for posting a thread, and personally, I think it's nice to read stories that turn out good instead of all the bad things that we read on ENA all the time. greywolf is spot-on here. Ever since I started keeping a diary at the age of 11, writing things out helps me sort through them. I'm the first to admit that I freak out at times and become borderline hysterical. Everyone has flaws, and that's one of mine. I recognize it and try to work on it as best I can, which is exactly why I came here. Rather than sit here in my living room and stew and do something rash that I would regret later (as it was, I'd already deleted his pictures off my phone), I reached out to other people for both different perspectives and support. Talking with the posters here distracted me and gave me a chance to calm down enough that by the time I talked to him, I was no longer at the point of making blanket accusations; instead, I was able to ask him about the picture calmly and without attacking him. It's human nature to seek out the company of others in times of crisis, and believe me, I was going through a crisis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted September 17, 2011 Share Posted September 17, 2011 If we all thought through before posting on here, why would ENA even exist? People have unprotected sex and ask questions here before taking a test, people write letters to their ex's and post here before sending them.... It's what this board is for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond78 Posted September 17, 2011 Share Posted September 17, 2011 It's human nature to seek out the company of others in times of crisis, and believe me, I was going through a crisis. Yes, I was feeling the crisis too! lol But I am so glad you guys talked it out and things are going well again. Life always throws unexpected curve balls and I must say you handled it very well! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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