fallingisfun Posted August 4, 2004 Share Posted August 4, 2004 Imagine me standing out in the streets Arms in the air while I conjure a scream Spinning in circles, like, "how can this be?" Why did I let you see inside of me? You said to depend, resistance I tried Then I gave in, and began to confide A blanket, my comfort, you were my life I gave you my heart; you fed me your lies Its fine, I'm not mad, just wish you were here I hate that I loved you, and still hold you dear I'm glad you left, can't you see my cheer? Can't you see me drowning in my happy tears? You played a sick game, but what was the point To love me, hold me; to mend then destroy? When you looked at me, did you see a toy? Flip me around, heads or tails, like a coin Are you satisfied now, you won, I'm gone Isn't that what you were counting on Leading me along like I was your dog Then when you were done, dropping me off Its fine, I'm not mad, just wish you were here I hate that I loved you, and still hold you dear I'm glad you left, can't you see my cheer? Can't you see me drowning in my happy tears? You left me after all of my walls were dropped Just when I needed you, your love just stopped Like a balloon, all my wishes were popped And now my remains are waiting to be mopped You left me cold, your reason, unknown Like a leaf in the storm, I was just blown Up and away, so you could be on your own Or find someone else to love then disown Its fine, I'm not mad, just wish you were here I hate that I loved you, and still hold you dear I'm glad you left, can't you see my cheer? Can't you see me drowning in my happy tears? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ang3l2004 Posted August 4, 2004 Share Posted August 4, 2004 Wow that was wonderful very well written with alot of emotion very nice job Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lunatic Posted August 4, 2004 Share Posted August 4, 2004 Great poem with a lot of emotions. Keep up the good work with your writing... Hubman 8) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scout Posted August 4, 2004 Share Posted August 4, 2004 That poem just precisely nailed exactly how I feel about my break-up (except for the recurring stanza "i'm fine, not mad, just wish you were here). Well done!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fallingisfun Posted August 4, 2004 Author Share Posted August 4, 2004 Thanks everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_hate_the_world47 Posted August 4, 2004 Share Posted August 4, 2004 That was a wnderful poem.You have great talent.Keep up the good work. ~Meagan~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
under_the_pressure Posted August 4, 2004 Share Posted August 4, 2004 That poem was amazing. You have real talent. My b/f and I just 'broke up' and he kinda treat me like I was a piece of meat. But very nice job. under* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartbroken_f Posted August 5, 2004 Share Posted August 5, 2004 That was a fabulous poem. You are really talented and you can conjure up strong emotions in readers as you did with me. Please keep up the great work!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fallingisfun Posted August 5, 2004 Author Share Posted August 5, 2004 Thanks everybody! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartbroken_f Posted August 6, 2004 Share Posted August 6, 2004 You're welcome. Hope to read more of your work some time soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fallingisfun Posted August 6, 2004 Author Share Posted August 6, 2004 I have a feeling I'll be posting plenty of poems in here. Thanks for the support. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stinkweed Posted August 6, 2004 Share Posted August 6, 2004 Great poem. I like how you express feelings and make them get inside of the reader. Keep up the good work =D>. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmptySoul Posted August 10, 2004 Share Posted August 10, 2004 I like it. Be proud, I don't usually like rhyming poetry. Empty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fallingisfun Posted August 10, 2004 Author Share Posted August 10, 2004 Thanks, and I don't usually write rhyming poetry. That's mostly what I post in here because most of the readers on this forum are into the rhyming thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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