Bored with life, and becoming so miserable because of it.

[Ritz Maidge]

I am almost 22 years old. When I look at most other people my age, I feel a tad bit jealous - all of their friends, the parties, big social gatherings, or just having somebody to talk to at any given moment. Me? I don't have that. I really never have - and it's making me miserable.

 

Every day, I am told how "beautiful" "smart" "friendly" and "nice" I am. Yet I still can't say that I have any friends... People hang around me a few times, then they bore of me and disappear.

 

I have tried and tried for the past two weeks to get my "friends" to hang out and do something, but it's always the same stuff: "I'm busy" or something along those lines.

 

Oh, lets try this one on for size: a couple of weeks ago a "friend" was going clubbing, but said that she was going for her cousins birthday - it was just going to be the two of them doing family stuff. She said she would invite me the next time she went out. This past Thursday, I sent her a text to see what she was doing for St. Patrick's day - I asked her if she wanted to go grab a couple of drinks that evening, and then maybe go to a club or something. Her response, "Oh, I can't, I'm already going out with some friends." Really? She didn't even bother to invite me.

 

I consider myself to be a social and active person. I don't like being idle - I like to be on the go and doing things. But more than that, I NEED people. I feel completely dead and empty inside if I don't have people to see, talk to, or hang out with! The only thing that is keeping me semi-sane here is the fact that I am in school, therefore get to see people daily... and I also work, so I get to interact with people at work daily.

 

But that's not enough. What do I do when I'm not working or don't have classes, like today? I sent a "friend" a text earlier asking if he would like to go to a car show for a little bit today. He has yet to respond... and I think he's just going to ignore the text completely. I have a gut feeling telling me that.

 

I really don't know what to do with myself. Life is * * * * ty without people in it. I like to do anything and everything - I can find fun in most all situations - but I need people to do it with, and that's where it all fails. I'm not the "friend" that people want to hang out with, I'm just the "friend" that people go to when they need help with something....

 

 

When I don't have people to hang out with, or something to keep me busy, I find something... and that often involves going out and shopping. I can't keep doing this. I've spent entirely too much money shopping this past month.... but I can't control it. It's the only thing I can think of at times to keep me "busy" and sane.

[MindHead]

WARNING RAMBLING AHEAD

 

There was a time when i felt I had to need for friends. I thought all I needed to be happy was to immerse myself in some endeavor of self-improvement, whether it was music, fitness, science, or whatever. Until I realized, whats the point if no one is even aware or can share in these interest or talents? I felt like a tree falling in forest, with no around, I might as well not even exist. So I since then, I've trying to fill that social void in my life, but it hasn't been easy.

I think I COULD' have a meaningful conversation with almost anyone. Music, art, entertainment, sports, construction, spirituality, science, current events I'm up on them all. In a group setting, I think people usually find me pretty funny and original, and I can usually a enjoyable time, vice versa.

But when it comes to having a one on one conversation, especially with a girl I would like to get to know better, my mind is usually a barren wasteland. The questions and quirps that I think come to most people so effortlessly, never seem to come into my head. So instead, of talking about something and building a personnel connection with someone, I'll usually just end up avoiding them, as opposed to coming off as boring or stupid.

If we don't make "close" friendships, its pretty hard to have even casual friends, because they're often our connection to social gatherings. I can empathize with how lonely it is when the weekend comes, and you're expecting a 'friend' to call you up but it just doesn't happen.

Remember, your pretty fortunate that your around people quite often, whether your at work or school, take advantage of these opportunities. Sometimes, it helps to think up some questions before we get to gathering. Although it hurts to get turned down, planning events or inviting people out works more often than you think, because occasionally others may feel just as bored and lonely.

[LBP]

This is totally normal. More people feel this way than you might think. The truth is, even the most popular of individuals spend a majority of their lives alone. Most of them don't realize this, but it is inevitably true. You, at an early age, are becoming better equipped to accept and understand this. Consider your experiences a blessing rather than a burden. Work on your own activities and interests. Learn. I am confident that this will be a practical improvement for you.

[MindHead]

i think i spoke a bit too lengthy about my own experiences there....didn't want to seem like a jerk for distracting anyone from your post, seeing its not my thread.

 

I think your right though, there's alot more lonely people in the world than one would think. Some more often than others... generally they're alot more open to friendship.