Toji Posted July 30, 2004 Share Posted July 30, 2004 Harsh words & violent blows Hidden secrets nobody knows Eyes are open, hands are fisted Deep inside I'm warped & twisted So many tricks & so many lies Too many whens & too many whys Nobody's special, nobody's gifted I'm just me, warped & twisted Sleeping awake & choking on a dream Listening loudly to a silent scream Call my mind, the number's unlisted Lost in someone so warped & twisted On my knees, alive but dead Look at the invisible blood I've bled I'm not gone, my mind has drifted Don't expect much, I'm warped & twisted Burnt out, wasted, empty, & hollow Today's just yesterday's tomorrow The sun died out, the ashes sifted I'm still here, warped & twisted Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stinkweed Posted July 30, 2004 Share Posted July 30, 2004 That's really good. The feelings portrayed in the poem are very sincere... nice job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emotional Posted July 30, 2004 Share Posted July 30, 2004 that was sick~ i liked it a lot..i feel u on that..i like all the ryhmes in it and it makes a lot of since!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neva_black_n_white Posted July 30, 2004 Share Posted July 30, 2004 I really liked what you writ, it seemed to be precise yet at the same time based on oxymorons, i dont know it was cleverly written, i know i enjoyed reading it, it was a poem that was intensively written and really drew me into it, i dont know what to say about it, it was great, seriously! kel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
under_the_pressure Posted July 30, 2004 Share Posted July 30, 2004 that was an amazing poem. terrific. it's so real because i can totally connect to it. great job. under Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toji Posted July 30, 2004 Author Share Posted July 30, 2004 thanks all though i dont really like this one i guess its ok.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_hate_the_world47 Posted July 31, 2004 Share Posted July 31, 2004 That was a wonderful poem.Keep writing. ~Meagan~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toji Posted July 31, 2004 Author Share Posted July 31, 2004 i like your poem Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ang3l2004 Posted August 2, 2004 Share Posted August 2, 2004 WOW that was a great poem,Keep up the writing you have talent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fallingisfun Posted August 4, 2004 Share Posted August 4, 2004 I love it. The repetition was perfect, your rhyme scheme was great, and it made perfect sense. The flow was also flawless. Keep writing, this is seriously good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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