Male's opinion on email

[Dusk66]

Hi, I wrote another threat a couple of days ago.

I have some problems with my boyfriend, and although the love has been damaged, I still love him. He has done things wrong, and that’s his problem.

But I also feel I have done things wrong, like acting emotionally and upset which I feel I let myself down and I pushed him away.

Then he was in facebook looking for a relationship and I haven’t heard from him again, one month ago.

And for this last reason I feel I need to do something about it, and I don’t know if it is possible to sort things out between us, but otherwise it will be a closure.

By the way we are living on different countries, we met a couple of years ago on a holiday and we have been in contact since then.

 

What do you think if I write to him an email like this:

 

I love you, but I am not completely sure, because we don’t know much of each other and we have hardly spent any time together.

It would have been a good idea to meet in X( country where he is working), because you know that that’s not possible en Y (your country) after what happened, because I don’t think I have been able to forgive you for that.

It seems like we want different things.

If you want to go out with somebody else, that’s not problem. I’ll leave my heart free as it was the day I met you.

Now I am going travelling.

I finish my work in October.

If there is nothing that you can do to see each other, nothing can be between us.

If you are looking for somebody else, one thing is clear you don’t love me.

I think that it is better that we take our own path.

 

Is there anything that you would change? Do I lower myself? Does it make me loose my dignity? Is there anything that will push him even further away from me? Do you think that it is a good idea?

[ToF]

Hi Dusk,

 

Well I'm not a male, but I do have my two cents to add if you don't mind. I notice that you call him your boyfriend, but it seems like he's your ex-boyfriend from what you have written here. If I understand correctly, you haven't spoken in a month and he's openly, actively been looking for other relationships. Whether you officially agreed on a break-up or not, it sounds as if this relationship is over for him, and has been for a while now.

 

Personally, I'm in favor of getting the closure you need. But I don't think it would be wise to go into this with much hope of it leading to a reconciliation with him. It's possible that you may not even get a response, unfortunately. If he's done with the relationship, then this is a good tool for closure, but it's not going to help you get back together with him. Maybe you should start looking into your own healing? Moving on?

[fastball2113]

"What do you think if I write to him an email like this:

 

I love you, but I am not completely sure, because we don’t know much of each other and we have hardly spent any time together.

It would have been a good idea to meet in X( country where he is working), because you know that that’s not possible en Y (your country) after what happened, because I don’t think I have been able to forgive you for that.

It seems like we want different things.

If you want to go out with somebody else, that’s not problem. I’ll leave my heart free as it was the day I met you.

Now I am going travelling.

I finish my work in October.

If there is nothing that you can do to see each other, nothing can be between us.

If you are looking for somebody else, one thing is clear you don’t love me.

I think that it is better that we take our own path."

 

As a guy, if I had broken up with someone based of trust based issues there would be no return. There's a double-standard that if a man makes a mistake that the woman does NOT have to forgive him, but if a woman makes a mistake that he has to take her back. If you haven't been able to forgive him yet, don't bother with the email. If you feel like you've forgiven him, that the slate is clean then go ahead

[Dusk66]

Don't you think that if he hasn't valued me enough I am devaluing myself even more by giving him more chances?

Don't you think I'm increasing his alpha ego?

A man when he cares gives 100% and if you are not a prirority for him I don't thing any talking will change.

Men don't react with words.

I just wanted him to see me value myself.

[ToF]

Don't you think that if he hasn't valued me enough I am devaluing myself even more by giving him more chances?

Don't you think I'm increasing his alpha ego?

A man when he cares gives 100% and if you are not a prirority for him I don't thing any talking will change.

Men don't react with words.

I just wanted him to see me value myself.

 

If you think you're doing all this by sending him this email, then it's probably a bad idea to send it.

 

Why do you want him to see you value yourself?

That's something that should only matter to you.