Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 Oh my gosh.. I'm back from uni and just catching up on your journal now OG - and WOW - the dream dress is beeaautiful. I'm so glad you can get it now - and because the tax money is money you didn't expect - it feels like getting it for free! I got back over a grand in tax too - and I thought I was going to have to pay money. H tells me I need to treat myself.. but I don't know what to spend it on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 I thought I was going to have to pay too. CS told me to treat myself and I was like I don't need anything, but how would you feel if I wanted to get our dress? He was instnatly happy, lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 lol, it's fine. After I sent it I was like 'she's going to think I'm a crazy person for that random question ' hahaha I was thinking of trying to sell it on e bay honestly... I mean, why not? They are hard to sell though... I got two dresses too. The first one I got 6 months before the wedding. After a day of dress shopping with my mum I was so tired and frustrated (I am not a shopper at all) that I just picked one that mum loved (that was the clue right there that the dress was a disaster - she always loves stuff that looks horrendous on me) and I thought looked different and I thought I liked. After it arrived, I put it in the cupboard and didn't look at it or try it on once. FInally, two weeks before the wedding (when I finally started getting excited about it because it was close now) I put the dress on - and I bawled my eyes out. It was sooooooo awful. My parents kept saying "don't cry! We can get another one!" and I was all "sob sob - no - sob sob - we can't waste money - sob sob - it's awful - sob sob sob". My dad told me it was no problem and that they wasted money all the time so they could definitely waste some for my wedding so we went and got the second one two weeks before - off the rack - had it altered I tried to sell my first one on ebay. Surprise surprise noone wanted it. But then my first one was hideous. At least your first one is genuinely a beautiful dress - you'll no doubt have much better luck. But ebay is probably not the way to go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 I hope so.. no lie, we are paying about $100 for him to stay in a hotel as near to the airport as we can get him to put my mind at ease. He'll go up the day before, spend the night, then catch his morning flight. I am taking NO chances this time... I think this is all way better now. I mean - court house weddings are all fine if its what you want but you wanted a big wedding initially and the October wedding sounds sooooo much more suited to what you guys wanted. You now get the dream dress.. great photographer.. beautiful venue with inside and outside options and an officiant and at least the option to write your vows or add little poems or speeches if you want to. Just goes to show - the Universe wanted you to have a better wedding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 I have it listed on e bay right now.. .I may see if a consignment shop will buy it or somethign like that.... Yeah... the Universe could have picked a more subtle way of telling us, lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 I would not have gotten married if I felt that way about the "piece of paper" you refer to in a dismissive way ... As far as travel I personally would find it terrible if my husband planned a trip without checking in with me first especially since we have a small child. I would do the same. He also tells me if he's not going to be home at his normal time. I didn't interpret it that way - I didn't read it as a lack of importance attributed to marriage - but rather a heightened importance attributed to any committed relationship, married or unmarried, at least where the intention is to stay together forever (which is as committed as you can get really) - and thats what the jigsup seems to have. Despite not wanting to get married I always got the impression they intended to stay together forever. I kind of just read that as OG saying she feels married already so even though she's not married - there's things she couldnt do without discussing with CS - and does the jugsup feel the same way or is it different in her r'ship... As for the trip planning - I agree - not onyl would I feel terrible if he planned a trip without checking in with me first - but if he planned a trip without me coming along too for leisure purposes I'd feel pretty bad - even if he did check in with me first. But at least I can say that is reciprocal - I know he feels the same way. He'd be really sad and upset if I took a holiday without him coming too. But - not everyone is like that. I know a couple (and they had a kid at the time - have two more now) where the man takes holidays quite frequently without his wife. Somehow that works for them. But I know he used to be quite reluctant to have kids so maybe their deal was "ok - we can have kids - but you have to accept that I'll need holidays by myself without either of you". I couldnt do it but it seems to work for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 ^yeap. No one enters a relationship thinking 'hm, this will fail in three years' therefore the basics of a relationship are no different to the vows of marriage - they just aren't said out loudl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 I don't think LT couples make the same vows as married people especially married people who have religious ceremonies. Why do you say "especially married people who have religious ceremonies"? Sometimes I see people (not you Batya) say that you shouldnt bother to get married at all if you aren't religious. I don't understand that at all. A promise is a promise is a promise. Is it any less of a promise because I don't believe I'm going to go to some firey inferno where I'll burn forevermore if I break my promise? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 Why do you say "especially married people who have religious ceremonies"? Sometimes I see people (not you Batya) say that you shouldnt bother to get married at all if you aren't religious. I don't understand that at all. A promise is a promise is a promise. Is it any less of a promise because I don't believe I'm going to go to some firey inferno where I'll burn forevermore if I break my promise? By that definition CS and I aren't getting married then because the word God nor any religious aspect is mentioned in our vows - I made sure of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 Honestly at this point I don't care about the cost... the one we are looking at ti's literally right next to the aiprot. Short of him getting run over by a bus or car *knock on wood* he'll get there at least. Yeah I definitely think - for both of your piece of mind alone - it's more than worth the cost. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 It's pretty competative, but hey it's worth a go. It's basically an in depth assesment, interviews, special and verbal reasoning, mental agility, the whole 9 yards but then again the pay is brilliant - starting salary is $75,000! Wow - that is a pretty amazing starting salary!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 CS and I only exchanged about 10 or 15 emails today. I hate the first Tuesday of the month. He has this meeting thing he has to do so instead of the normal 50-60 we send throughout the day, we barely communicate because he's busy with the meeting. Damn meetings... Wow - that is such a lot of emailing - I would have thought 10-15 a day was a lot! Let alone 50-60!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 Wow - that is such a lot of emailing - I would have thought 10-15 a day was a lot! Let alone 50-60!! we send each other an email every 10-15 minutes. No lie when I say we are in constant contact through the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 Are they long emails? Or a bit like status updates? Or a mix? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 Hm, both. I mean, we literally hold a conversation the whole day. The only times we don't email is when one of us is eating, busy at work, or sleeping. We talk about what we would tlak about on the phone just, in an email. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 Wow - that's awesome.. it's lucky you are both so good with written communication! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KH26 Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 It's pretty competative, but hey it's worth a go. It's basically an in depth assesment, interviews, special and verbal reasoning, mental agility, the whole 9 yards but then again the pay is brilliant - starting salary is $75,000! Oh cool! Sounds like it would be quite interesting too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SayWhen Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 We're also having a totally secular ceremony. I even left out "holy matrimony" from our vows. I hope you find a buyer for your gown! You can also list it on a pre-owned wedding dress site. They're very high traffic...I bet it'd sell quicker on there than on eBay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 3, 2011 Author Share Posted March 3, 2011 We're also having a totally secular ceremony. I even left out "holy matrimony" from our vows. I hope you find a buyer for your gown! You can also list it on a pre-owned wedding dress site. They're very high traffic...I bet it'd sell quicker on there than on eBay. I don't think we have that either... do you know of some of the pre owned wedding dress sites Say When? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 what about just returning it to link removed? you never wore it, right? (oh, nevermind, you got straps put on).... yeah, you can always try ebay... just put a minimum bid of what you want. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 3, 2011 Author Share Posted March 3, 2011 So I went and re tried my dream dress on. The second I walked out of the fitting room and saw myself in it I fell in love with it all over again. It's just so perfect, it accents all my curves and I FEEL beautiful and sexy in it. It's casual but at the same time formal... I tried on an 18 to begin with and it fit. I told my consultant I was planning on losing a little weight and she talked me into trying on a 16 and it FIT! I was so shocked! And it wasn't too tight, I could still breath and everything and I think with the 16 I won't have to have it altered at the bust because it fits so well, what weight I do lose might not affect that area. The hem has to be hemmed and I may put a bustle on it. Now, remmeber how the old strapless dress made me look top heavy? Do you guys think this dress does too? image removed I don't feel as top heavy in it as I did with the last one and putting straps on it will be easy but I wanted third parties opinions. Also, I got my earrings! image removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 3, 2011 Author Share Posted March 3, 2011 what about just returning it to link removed? you never wore it, right? (oh, nevermind, you got straps put on).... yeah, you can always try ebay... just put a minimum bid of what you want. Yeah, that and the seller only allowed returns for like 14 days. It's on ebay now so we shall see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SayWhen Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 link removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KH26 Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 Ohhh the dress is gorgeous!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted March 4, 2011 Author Share Posted March 4, 2011 Alright, figured I would rattle off a quick entry before I ate. Mom and I went to the wedding venue today to look around. While it's not the chapel on the edge of the mountain that CS and I would love to have, it's within our price range and easily accesiable to everyone. CS is sleeping on it - he REALLY didn't like the inside and really, it's not my taste either - and we had a big of a disagreement on my way to work but it's pretty much our venue. If he agrees to it. I mean, it's not THAT bad. It's an old Southern house - actually one of the town's historic landmarks - and the inside just.. well, it kind of reminds me of a funeral home. The front of the house is gorgeous and we would love to have the ceremony there but it's RIGHT next to a street so we would have to be dealing with cars zooming past during the ceremony. No thank you. image removed The backyard isn't that bad - it would look better once the trees bloom - but it's kind of hilly. There is this one area were it levels out enough for us to do the ceremony. It's a walk, no doubt., Good thing my entrance song is 4 minutes long, hahaha image removed I have a lot of ideas running through my head on how we can do things there. There was one funny moment. This is the dining room (were the food for the reception will be). Notice the wallpaper? This is how the conversation went: image removed Lady: "This is wallpaper dated back to when the house was originally built in the 1800's" Me and my mom: "Oooooooo!" Lady: "It depicts the Revolutionary War-" Me: *burst into a fit of laughter. Lady: *looks at me funny* My mom: "Her fiance's side lost that war." Me: *continues to giggle for like five minutes* On a much sadder note, a family friend passed away this morning. He grew up with my dad but became super close with my mom while they were married - and was one of the ones who pushed my mom to leave my dad over the abuse and infedilaty. I always knew him, ever since I was a little girl. Last time I saw him I was working in my first gas station so... '07? He had a heart attack today. Dead at 43. He's a year younger than my mom... I think that really shook her up. He was a truck driver and was out of state when he died, they are waiting on his body to be flown back home before announcing when the funeral will be. I hope it's this weekend so I can go. Then we only have to worry about my dad showing up.... -.- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.