brazilgirl21 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 BG - I read in one of your threads that, as someone from a wealthy family, you thought nothing of spending several hundred dollars on a bag to save walking a few extra yards in a mall to buy a less expensive one. I have also followed threads where you fly home on weekends, fly to New York or Florida or LA. Most people don't live like that. They can't afford to blow hundreds of pounds on hotels and extra flights - they live on a day to day basis and just don't have the sort of money that you are fortunate enough to have. I understand that rich people live lives somewhat insulated from the harsher realities that most people have to cope with but perhaps this will prompt you to take a look and see how other people have to deal with the vagaries of life. DN - That may be the case. I was not suggesting that CS blow hundreds of thousands of pounds. Just that he stay at the airport and maybe spend 200 more to change his flight. Explain what happened. Like I said, my friend flew from Heathrow and his airline was pretty understanding. He paid 250 more and got another flight. And he didn't go to a hotel. He spent the 12 hours on the airport trying to resolve his flight issue. And he did. I'm not suggesting CS buy a new flight or a private jet to go visit his girlfriend... but cashing 200-300 more and waiting around in the airport to get MARRIED doesn't sound too bad to me. Again, this is my opinion and I don't think the fact I'm wealthy or not has anything to do with it considering I got a few PM's of people who agreed with me and said this had to be posted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
renaissancewoman101 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Sometimes even $200 can break the bank though. I do see both sides. It's hard. I do think OG and CS made the best choice possible, given the circumstances, and I wish them both the best Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 Well, people can think what they want. I personally would not be so selfish as to ask my fiance to sit around in an airport for 12 hours- or 5 days- JUST to catch another flight to see me. That is me personally. Perhaps I put less emphasizes on the fact it was our wedding and more on us seeing each other. I'm the Bride, I still am the Bride, and it didn't bother me one bit we had to reschedule our wedding because of this. I'm having a hard time understanding why people are condemning our decision (not his decision, OUR decision) and pretty much on the verge of saying CS didn't care enough to catch his flight when I, the other partner in this relationship, while missing him and would rather have him here, understands. Again, I found it overly selfish to ask him to stay in an airport for that long just to catch another flight. And perhaps now I understand (from DN"s post) why you still think $200-300 isn't that much. For those of us that don't have a lot of money or that are in an LDR that causes a lot of our income to go toward seeing each other, $200 $300 is A LOT of money. It's not just chump change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brazilgirl21 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 OG - If you are okay with it, that's all that matters. I guess you guys are kind of flexible about the wedding day. I just have this really big ideal of my wedding day and it would crush me if my fiance couldn't make it. I definetly wouldn't care if he waited in the airport for 12 hours... If that's selfish, then I'm probably a lot less selfless than you are. Anyways, apparently you both have no problem re-scheduling the wedding and you are dealing with this really well. I'm not going to post my opinion anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 At the end of the day, a wedding day is one day in your life. If he had missed the flight because of jitters or down right said he didn't want to get married it would be different but he had no control over this. I very well could have told him to sit until Friday at the airport but I found that to be extremely selfish on my part when all it takes is a simple moving of the wedding date which, in a way, worked out better for us. People put way too much emphaize on wedding days. It's one day. Yes, it's a huge day but if you can reschedule to make it easier on your partner... doesn't matter when it happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 This is the point though. To you, and apparently some other people, $200 is nothing. To other people it is the difference between being able to pay the rent or eat. It is very easy to expect other people to make financial sacrifices that you yourself would never have to make. These are very tough times for many people - some however have been insulated from them by family wealth. Those who are struggling to get by don't much like being told how to manage the meagre amount of money they do have by people who have never been in their position. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KH26 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Tbh, if this had happened to me (I'd missed my flight and would have to pay $200 more) I probably wouldn't have been able to afford that and as much as I would have wanted to go, I would have had to not go because it would have been difficult for me to then afford things while I was there. From everything I've read here, from posts they've both posted and the way they talk about eachother I really can't imagine that CS would have just wanted to miss his wedding and not cared that much. But everyone is different. Some people can afford to pay the extra (and if this were me and I had the money I would pay) but not everyone can. And I can imagine a wedding is not cheap, and it will be nice for them to have that extra money to enjoy their honeymoon when it does happen, especially if they're not going to see eachother again for a while afterwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidehop Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 I'm sure the wedding will be better than ever OG. That was a such a bizarre day too; I heard that the Prime Minister was also stuck because of the accident. Some injuries but luckily no one lost their life. It would've been god awful to lose your loved ones let alone on a Valentine's Day. In the end what matters is you two are together safely and happily Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 Exactly, if we had it and it wouldn't have cut into our budget, we would have. But still, even then I would have felt bad asking him to stay there for any long length of time. I have been in an airport before, it's not hte most comfortable place to be for more than a few hours... The few times we have talked about it (Since we are on a no wedding planning few weeks right now) it's def seemed like it was for the better. The date we are looking at means more of my family can come and we can do a few more things if we wanted to. Exactly. He's okay, that's all I care about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brazilgirl21 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 The thing is, I highly doubt he would have had to wait until Friday. Like DN said, I fly all the time and have a lot of experience in airports. Yes, the remaining flights may have been full, but there is ALWAYS people who cancel their trips last minute and end up giving up their space on the plane. Just like CS did when he missed his. If he had hung around in the airport, I'm sure he would have been able to get a new flight with DELTA in a time span of 12-24 hours. And without spending more than 300 pounds. But well, maybe he didn't have this information at the time. I just checked the DELTA site and they have literally 20 flights from Heathrow to Atlanta every single day. He wouldn't have had to wait until Friday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 The thing is, I highly doubt he would have had to wait until Friday. Like DN said, I fly all the time and have a lot of experience in airports. Yes, the remaining flights may have been full, but there is ALWAYS people who cancel their trips last minute and end up giving up their space on the plane. Just like CS did when he missed his. If he had hung around in the airport, I'm sure he would have been able to get a new flight with DELTA in a time span of 12-24 hours. And without spending more than 300 pounds. But well, maybe he didn't have this information at the time. I just checked the DELTA site and they have literally 20 flights from Heathrow to Atlanta every single day. He wouldn't have had to wait until Friday. I still would not have asked him to sit in an aiprot for 24 hours to do it. And 300 pounds is STILL a lot of money. We had all the information at the time we made the decision. Yes there are a lot of flights from London to Atlanta but there was no guarantee he would have goten on them considering they always over book. Again, I wouldn't have asked him to stay in an airport when he had alreayd been up since 5 am that morning another 24 hours on the off chance he caught a flight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brazilgirl21 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 This is the point though. To you, and apparently some other people, $200 is nothing. To other people it is the difference between being able to pay the rent or eat. It is very easy to expect other people to make financial sacrifices that you yourself would never have to make. These are very tough times for many people - some however have been insulated from them by family wealth. Those who are struggling to get by don't much like being told how to manage the meagre amount of money they do have by people who have never been in their position. My dad was not wealthy when he got married to my mom. They actually went to their honeymoon on a bus. But you can be damn sure that he would have done everything to get to his wedding. My dad had the success he has because he is very aware of his rights and fight for them. There was an accident on the roads. It wasn't CS' fault that he lost his flight. The airline would have to put him in another one with a minimun fee. Anyways, I'm out this thread since I'm being attacked for being wealthy. OG says that CS has a really good job all the time. It's not like he is struggling to eat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
renaissancewoman101 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 But still, even with being able to get a flight, he would still have to pay the $200 change fee, and that is a lot of money. Also, it seems, most flights are overbooked nowadays, and is harder to get on as standby. I flew a few times last year and found that flights were stuffed to the gills, and there was always a list of people waiting for standby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 My dad was not wealthy when he got married to my mom. They actually went to their honeymoon on a bus. But you can be damn sure that he would have done everything to get to his wedding. My dad had the success he has because he is very aware of his rights and fight for them. There was an accident on the roads. It wasn't CS' fault that he lost his flight. The airline would have to put him in another one with a minimun fee. Anyways, I'm out this thread since I'm being attacked for being wealthy. OG says that CS has a really good job all the time. It's not like he is struggling to eat. When all your money goes to a wedding and flying and hotels, having $200 extra does become a problem. It's great your dad made his wedding but I'm not so selfish of a person as to ask my fiance to sit in an airport for God knows how long simply to come see me. Weddings can be rescheduled. The fact is, we wouldn't have been able to get married if he had caught a plan because people had that day asked off in my family, they can't just drop everything to come to a wedding. For us, financially, it made sense just to scrap the trip and get married in October. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KH26 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Also airports are not cheap. Buying food and drink if you had to stay for a while would probably mount up too (probably not that much but still, that's probably money that doesn't need to be spent). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
renaissancewoman101 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Also airports are not cheap. Buying food and drink if you had to stay for a while would probably mount up too (probably not that much but still, that's probably money that doesn't need to be spent). very true. I didn't think about that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sanesoul Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 I'm pretty bothered by the fact that this happened a couple days ago and people are still giving the "coulda, shoulda, woulda" advice. What's done is done, and you two seem to be handling it just fine. Life isn't like the movies (as you have pointed out), and things happen. It's how you deal with it afterwards that shows how strong the relationship is. You'll be fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 I'm pretty bothered by the fact that this happened a couple days ago and people are still giving the "coulda, shoulda, woulda" advice. What's done is done, and you two seem to be handling it just fine. Life isn't like the movies (as you have pointed out), and things happen. It's how you deal with it afterwards that shows how strong the relationship is. You'll be fine. Thank you Sanesoul. And you are right, it's not like the movies. Everything works out in the movies... life, sadly, it doesn't always. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 My dad was not wealthy when he got married to my mom. They actually went to their honeymoon on a bus. But you can be damn sure that he would have done everything to get to his wedding. My dad had the success he has because he is very aware of his rights and fight for them. There was an accident on the roads. It wasn't CS' fault that he lost his flight. The airline would have to put him in another one with a minimun fee. Anyways, I'm out this thread since I'm being attacked for being wealthy. OG says that CS has a really good job all the time. It's not like he is struggling to eat.You are not attacked for being wealthy - I am simply pointing out that you don't seem to understand how it is for people who are not. What your father may have done in a hypothetical situation is not the same thing as the real-life situation in which this couple found themselves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
civilservant Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 You're not being attacked for being wealthy, you're being attacked for attacking me in the first place. The fact of the matter is that us I do have a good job, but because of the smaller amount OG makes I pay for basically everything on our trips- I don't begrudge her that, at all- but it still means that it puts pressure on my finances (because I still have to eat, pay rent and live) to the point where I simply can't find $200 at a moments notice. It must be nice to live life without financial limitations- but I don't have a golden inheritance. And as for the people who PMd- they did so because they knew it was inappropriate to post what you did in the first place, because it's flogging a dead horse (me). What's done is done- OG and I consider the matter closed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 I don't think anyone is being attacked here for being rich. I come from a wealthy family myself. $200 is pocket change, essentially. Not bragging or anything, just saying how it is. I know CS did his darnest to try to get there and it just didn't work out, money-wise, time-wise. It's no one's fault. If this happened to me and my fiance/me were able to shovel out the $200 plus hotel accommodations, that's NOT a sign of "effort". It just means that we are fortunate enough to have that money to dish out. But not everyone is like that. It's not like CS is "sitting" on tons of money and just chose not to pay a little more to see OG. $200 (or even less to some) is a lot of money to come up with for a lot of people. I know that I'm in the minority but I understand that I am. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SayWhen Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 What's done is done...what's the point in going on about it? I think it's great that OG and CS took it in stride and are working to better their relationship and to reconnect emotionally after having spent so much time planning their wedding. Now that all the planning is essentially done, they can focus on each other and anticipate getting married without as much stress. I am thinking of you both today since I know the 16th was your planned wedding date...I hope you get some video chat time and can find a way to make today special Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brazilgirl21 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 I'm sorry I didn't want to make anyone feel bad... I probably shouldn't have commented but when people come to ENA, they do open their life and choices for criticism. Heck I know it has happened to me a few times and I do get upset by some feedback. I wish OG and CS very well, I hope it doesn't seem like otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Circe Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Is today shopping day with the bestie, OG? Will your niece come along too or does she hate shopping centres? I couldnt stand them as a kid (and not much has really changed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 I think fall colors will be better for outdoor photos rather than February slush. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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